Ducati Monster Forum

Kitchen Sink => No Moto Content => Topic started by: Speedbag on October 20, 2008, 11:25:31 AM

Title: RIP - Smokey
Post by: Speedbag on October 20, 2008, 11:25:31 AM
Today my friend Smokey died.  :'(

Smokey was a vintage Ariens garden tiller of undetermined age. My guess is that he was old, as he possessed no safety guards or equipment of any kind, nor did he have evidence of ever having any. I obtained him over a decade ago for the always great price of free, and used him to churn up the garden in the spring and fall.

Known by other names such as 'That Goddamned Tiller' or 'The Orange Piece of Shit', his official moniker stuck due to his thirst for straight 50 weight oil. Once started and running, Smokey would emit plumes of blue smoke rivaling that of most 2-stroke snowmobiles or motorcycles, ensuring a bug-free tilling experience as long as there was a slight breeze at your back to keep you out of the cloud.

'Once started and running' is a key phrase to describe him. Smokey's seriously clapped-out 5HP Briggs and Stratton pulled over like the spark plug wasn't even there, and each use required a thorough plug cleaning and at least three or four good shots of starting fluid combined with very precise throttle and choke settings and dozens of pulls. In case the smoke wasn't a good enough indication to the neighborhood that he was back in action, the clatter from the crankcase and the rusted-out shell of a muffler was. But he would always start and perform, despite my under-the-breath mutterings that he would toss his connecting rod sooner or later.

Today I invested roughly a half hour to stir him from his summer slumber, roughly the same amount of time necessary to complete the task of pulverizing my meager garden plot. And, finishing the last row of the garden, Smokey's engine belched a righteous, firebally BANG from his perforated muffler and clattered to rest, never to start again.

Rest in peace, Smokey.

(http://i367.photobucket.com/albums/oo118/Speedbag/smokey.jpg)

(anybody got a horizontal shaft Briggs laying around that they don't want?)
Title: Re: RIP - Smokey
Post by: Grampa on October 20, 2008, 11:27:50 AM
I got's me a dead tiller in the yard too.

I cant find a replacement carb for it. :(
Title: Re: RIP - Smokey
Post by: red baron on October 20, 2008, 11:28:02 AM
 [laugh]

RIP Smokey
Title: Re: RIP - Smokey
Post by: mitt on October 20, 2008, 11:28:58 AM
they don't make em like they used to..

rip

mitt
Title: Re: RIP - Smokey
Post by: Got Duc on October 20, 2008, 12:16:59 PM
Damn!

RIP trusty steed.

Get a Troy bilt as a replacement (after the pain is gone) you won't be disappointed.
Title: Re: RIP - Smokey
Post by: Howie on October 20, 2008, 02:23:05 PM
Poor Smokey :'(  RIP

I use a much more basic tool to till the earth, a shovel ;D
Title: Re: RIP - Smokey
Post by: Buckethead on October 20, 2008, 04:32:11 PM
Gotta love the "common sense" approach to safety.  [thumbsup]

He's in a better place now. At least I presume you took him to the dump.
Title: Re: RIP - Smokey
Post by: Speedbag on October 20, 2008, 04:35:03 PM
Quote from: Obsessed? on October 20, 2008, 04:32:11 PM

He's in a better place now. At least I presume you took him to the dump.

Oh, no. He's back in the garden shed waiting for his engine swap.  ;D
Title: Re: RIP - Smokey
Post by: akmnstr on October 20, 2008, 04:45:07 PM
QuoteOh, no. He's back in the garden shed waiting for his engine swap.  Grin

There ya go.  Don't let him Die.   

I picked up a tiller at a garage sale years ago.  It didn't run so I got a short block, rebuilt Tecumseh and got it running. 
It wasn't much for safety features either and many components were from a different engine so it's performance was, at best,
funky.  I always took great pride in my tiller though.  I had taken a piece of crap, got it to work, and then grew my own food. 
That's what happens when you combine a motor-head and a greeny eco freak, ya get vegetables with motor oil.   

Title: Re: RIP - Smokey
Post by: akmnstr on October 20, 2008, 04:46:42 PM
(http://i367.photobucket.com/albums/oo118/Speedbag/smokey.jpg)


That is a thing of beauty [clap] [clap]
Title: Re: RIP - Smokey
Post by: Buckethead on October 20, 2008, 04:49:35 PM
Quote from: Speedbag on October 20, 2008, 04:35:03 PM
Oh, no. He's back in the garden shed waiting for his engine swap.  ;D

Even better! He's on indefinite convalescent leave while he's on the organ-donor waiting list.
Title: Re: RIP - Smokey
Post by: herm on October 20, 2008, 05:07:51 PM
i confess i was expecting a much different topic here,........
Title: Re: RIP - Smokey
Post by: TiNi on October 20, 2008, 05:10:09 PM
me too  [laugh]
Title: Re: RIP - Smokey
Post by: akmnstr on October 20, 2008, 05:19:17 PM
Quote from: herm on October 20, 2008, 05:07:51 PM
i confess i was expecting a much different topic here,........

Quoteme too 

Yeah but, in these troubled times, wasn't this a pleasant surprise [clap] [clap]

And what about that photo of that piece of industrial art, truly a classic. 

Speedbag, got any more photos of the tiller, one just ain't enough.  Maybe one from ground level.  But
nothing that would embarrass smokey   [cheeky]
Title: Re: RIP - Smokey
Post by: Got Duc on October 20, 2008, 05:36:42 PM
So technically he didn't die he is just getting a bypass  [thumbsup]
Title: Re: RIP - Smokey
Post by: Speedbag on October 20, 2008, 06:19:19 PM
Quote from: akmnstr on October 20, 2008, 05:19:17 PM
Yeah but, in these troubled times, wasn't this a pleasant surprise [clap] [clap]

And what about that photo of that piece of industrial art, truly a classic. 

Speedbag, got any more photos of the tiller, one just ain't enough.  Maybe one from ground level.  But
nothing that would embarrass smokey   [cheeky]

By popular demand, I shall pull Smokey from the shed tomorrow and take a couple more shots for posterity.  ;) Stay tuned.

He is a model of simplicity, is he not? Safety, schmafety -- keep your damned hands out of where they don't belong, a product of a time before the Evil Product Safety Label and Guarding. He must be preserved.

He is not truly dead, just on a sabbatical of sorts until I find him a new heart.  :)
Title: Re: RIP - Smokey
Post by: superjohn on October 20, 2008, 06:20:35 PM
Farewell Smokey. May you forever rest gently in the dirt you once used to till so strongly.  ;D
Title: Re: RIP - Smokey
Post by: Howie on October 20, 2008, 08:43:28 PM
Quote from: Speedbag on October 20, 2008, 04:35:03 PM
Oh, no. He's back in the garden shed waiting for his engine swap.  ;D

[thumbsup]
Title: Re: RIP - Smokey
Post by: Rameses on October 20, 2008, 10:41:34 PM
He needs desmo power!!

[evil] [evil]
Title: Re: RIP - Smokey
Post by: Speedbag on October 21, 2008, 05:20:37 AM
Quote from: Rameses on October 20, 2008, 10:41:34 PM
He needs desmo power!!

[evil] [evil]

THAT would be awesome.....
Title: Re: RIP - Smokey
Post by: Speedbag on October 21, 2008, 08:35:09 AM
 :)

As promised:

(http://i367.photobucket.com/albums/oo118/Speedbag/Smokey2.jpg)

(http://i367.photobucket.com/albums/oo118/Speedbag/Smokey3.jpg)
Title: Re: RIP - Smokey
Post by: akmnstr on October 21, 2008, 09:17:47 AM
Quote from: Speedbag on October 21, 2008, 08:35:09 AM
:)

As promised:

(http://i367.photobucket.com/albums/oo118/Speedbag/Smokey2.jpg)

(http://i367.photobucket.com/albums/oo118/Speedbag/Smokey3.jpg)


Tiller porn, now that's hot.

Maybe when you replace the engine you could get some fatter wheels/tires and maybe
a few carbon fiber bits.  Then again,            why alter perfection. 
Title: Re: RIP - Smokey
Post by: OwnyTony on October 21, 2008, 09:34:55 AM
OOO a 4 stroke would fix that right up.  The simple "not-safe" parts only needs a motor.  better than home depot/lowes crap troy bitz or roybe crap.