|
Title: unexpected pregnancy Post by: Privateer on February 05, 2009, 09:55:27 PM so Tuesday my wife tells me she's pregnant. This was neither expected or planned. She's 40. I'm 37. We have two daughters 8 and 5.
And I'm seriously freaking out. Any words of wisdom, encouragement, whatever from anyone else who has had an "oops" child? thanks Andy Title: Re: unexpected pregnancy Post by: Popeye the Sailor on February 05, 2009, 10:09:10 PM Well......at least you didn't have 8?
Title: Re: unexpected pregnancy Post by: Big Troubled Bear on February 05, 2009, 10:10:25 PM Ease into it slowly, my oops is 3 years old now :o
Title: Re: unexpected pregnancy Post by: sugarcrook on February 05, 2009, 11:35:40 PM You're too old for the Foreign Legion.
Title: Re: unexpected pregnancy Post by: Mother on February 05, 2009, 11:38:35 PM ask her who the father is
Title: Re: unexpected pregnancy Post by: He Man on February 06, 2009, 12:16:35 AM dont tell the kid
Title: Re: unexpected pregnancy Post by: duclvr on February 06, 2009, 03:47:37 AM I've had a similar scare this past year. I'm too old to start over.
Title: Re: unexpected pregnancy Post by: TiNi on February 06, 2009, 04:15:13 AM congratulations! :)
you can do it! is either of your other children a girl by any chance? i ask because i was 5 when my brother was born, and i was a huge help to my mom. Title: Re: unexpected pregnancy Post by: Sinister on February 06, 2009, 06:27:49 AM so Tuesday my wife tells me she's pregnant. This was neither expected or planned. She's 40. I'm 37. We have two daughters 8 and 5. And I'm seriously freaking out. Any words of wisdom, encouragement, whatever from anyone else who has had an "oops" child? thanks Andy WOOOHOOO!! Congratulations, Andy! What a blessing. Our daughter was an 'unexpected joy' (wife on pill, had a plan, etc), and I can't think of anything better than that big two-toothed smile. It'll keep you young, bro. Have a ball. Greg Title: Re: unexpected pregnancy Post by: derby on February 06, 2009, 08:19:45 AM Have a ball. i think that's how he got into this situation. ;D Title: Re: unexpected pregnancy Post by: rgramjet on February 06, 2009, 08:48:23 AM My wife had our first son at the age of 40.
We were blessed with B/G twins 3 years ago this April. Her 47th birthday is today. Im 38. Your daughters will be a HUGE help just as my oldest son is. Its all good! Title: Re: unexpected pregnancy Post by: Duck-Stew on February 06, 2009, 08:48:54 AM No words of help Andy, but my brother was an 'oops' and he was an endless source of joy as we grew up. [thumbsup]
Title: Re: unexpected pregnancy Post by: Le Pirate on February 06, 2009, 08:49:04 AM Well, it might be unexpected, but thats a little late to worry about now ;D
You're going to be fine, you've done this twice before. plus, now you have built in help ....plus, your wife is going to need you now. Don't forget that there are greater chances for problems when a woman gets pregnant after around 35. Title: Re: unexpected pregnancy Post by: Vindingo on February 06, 2009, 08:57:55 AM My sister was and "oops" she is 15 years younger than me, :o 17 years between her and the oldest, and 13 between the youngest. It is almost like she is from a different generation, but has the same parents.
She is the greatest little kid and it taught me so much about raising and taking care of little ones. I think it keeps my parents young. Title: Re: unexpected pregnancy Post by: IZ on February 06, 2009, 09:00:36 AM ask her who the father is I'm going to steal that line! Yeah..right! That would NOT be good! :-X No words of help Andy, but my brother was an 'oops' and he was an endless source of joy as we grew up. [thumbsup] [laugh] I'm sure he says the same thing about you DS! CONGRATS P!! Title: Re: unexpected pregnancy Post by: Buckethead on February 06, 2009, 09:05:20 AM Once you both get past the brick-shitting phase, I'm sure you'll be fine. Its nothing you haven't seen before.
Title: Re: unexpected pregnancy Post by: ozmanyyy on February 06, 2009, 09:14:57 AM so Tuesday my wife tells me she's pregnant. This was neither expected or planned. She's 40. I'm 37. We have two daughters 8 and 5. And I'm seriously freaking out. Any words of wisdom, encouragement, whatever from anyone else who has had an "oops" child? thanks Andy Congrats dude, I wouldn't sweat it. Kids are awesome. I have 2 ( 8 and 4 ) and could not imagine life without them. If I started a little younger, I'd have at least one more. Best Title: Re: unexpected pregnancy Post by: Duck-Stew on February 06, 2009, 09:47:59 AM I'm sure he says the same thing about you DS! Yeah, you're right! :D Title: Re: unexpected pregnancy Post by: mitt on February 06, 2009, 01:34:00 PM I was an oops - mom was 44 and dad was 50. That was 35 years ago, when 40+ year old mothers were considered higher risk than today. I kept my parents young, and having a retired dad when I was 14 was pretty cool.
mitt Title: Re: unexpected pregnancy Post by: r_ciao on February 06, 2009, 03:26:06 PM Count your blessings. My bro and his wife are doing their third round of IVF and have spent over $80K on trying to get preggers. BTW, you are still young.
Good luck. Title: Re: unexpected pregnancy Post by: Grampa on February 06, 2009, 05:30:32 PM love it
Title: Re: unexpected pregnancy Post by: sbrguy on February 06, 2009, 06:15:29 PM goodluck and best wishes.
hope you have a good job to pay for what you know is coming. live and learn, you only have yourself to thank. [clap] Title: Re: unexpected pregnancy Post by: Charlief on February 06, 2009, 06:37:05 PM I don't know... congrats if you are happy... thats what counts.
Several friends of mine have had "scares" as they call it. Early 40's and just starting to enjoy life with the kids away at college. They both went out for celebration dinners when they found out they weren't preggo. Actually going away with one of the couples this week on vacation.... wouln't have happened if she was pregnant. Title: Re: unexpected pregnancy Post by: Diesel on February 06, 2009, 07:10:06 PM Ease into it slowly, my oops is 3 years old now :o Perhaps if he had eased into it slowly in the first place he would not have had to start this thread. ;D Title: Re: unexpected pregnancy Post by: Gus Duc on February 06, 2009, 07:24:25 PM Sell the forks...... diapers are expensive :P
On a serious note.... as a father of 3, one unplanned, you'll kick yourself fo feeling this way once you hold him or her. Ask me how I know.... I was an absolute ass to my wife when she came home with the ultrasound..... that little image is now almost 2 & I love her to pieces. Give it some time & look for the positives...... you'll be much better off down the road [thumbsup] Title: Re: unexpected pregnancy Post by: superjohn on February 06, 2009, 07:36:02 PM Well......at least you didn't have 8? Please tell me you have never considered a career as a councilor? ;D Title: Re: unexpected pregnancy Post by: Popeye the Sailor on February 06, 2009, 07:40:11 PM Please tell me you have never considered a career as a councilor? ;D Actually....I was a councilor :P Title: Re: unexpected pregnancy Post by: lauramonster on February 06, 2009, 08:11:50 PM doesn't say a GOOD counselor.....
Title: Re: unexpected pregnancy Post by: ducpainter on February 06, 2009, 08:14:24 PM Actually....I was a councilor :P for little girls at a summer camp? ;DTitle: Re: unexpected pregnancy Post by: Popeye the Sailor on February 06, 2009, 08:17:51 PM for little girls at a summer camp? ;D Can't say-it's councilor-client privileges. Title: Re: unexpected pregnancy Post by: ducpainter on February 06, 2009, 08:20:51 PM Can't say-it's councilor-client privileges. You're not one of those....are you? Title: Re: unexpected pregnancy Post by: Gus Duc on February 06, 2009, 08:30:46 PM To the OP........ one way to turn this into a true positive would be to hire BP as your nanny [laugh]
Title: Re: unexpected pregnancy Post by: Privateer on February 07, 2009, 11:28:40 PM thank you for the kind words, advice, and encouragement.
We struggled to have our first two kids, so this one.. well we never expected to conceive without treatment. I'm still trying to get my head around it, but I figure I have 8 months or so to figure it out. Pretty much puts everything on hold for 5 years. New carpet? not until the kids are older. Big vacation? Not until the kids are older. Save $5,000/year on child care? Not until the kids are older. Now to figure out where everyone is going to sleep, we ran out of bedrooms. Andy Title: Re: unexpected pregnancy Post by: rgramjet on February 08, 2009, 06:04:31 AM Everything thats on hold will pale in comparison the first time that little critter falls asleep on your chest.
Bunk beds are your friend! Title: Re: unexpected pregnancy Post by: TiNi on February 08, 2009, 06:07:52 AM ditto on the bunk beds :)
my older brother and i shared a bedroom until my little brother started sleeping through the night, then i got my own room back... Title: Re: unexpected pregnancy Post by: mbalmer on February 08, 2009, 06:22:33 PM My parents had 7 "oops" kids. They had the youngest when the oldest was 22. I was number 5. My mom was 42 when the youngest was born. It's all good! You are going to have a blast. Post the ultrasound picture when you get it.
Title: Re: unexpected pregnancy Post by: LA on February 08, 2009, 07:07:34 PM I was 41 when my little Rachael came along. I did the math real quickly when my wife gave me the news - 64 years old to get out of college. WOW! Had my head spinning. Well it's 15 now, 5'10" and the son I always wanted. She's pushing to trade her 230TT for a 250 Ninja and she's got her eye on the RS and the old Norton.
Look at those eyes. Looking back now, there's no Faustian bargain I wouldn't make to keep her. At 13 and now 15. (http://i463.photobucket.com/albums/qq353/1ajess/Rachael.jpg) (http://i463.photobucket.com/albums/qq353/1ajess/CSC_0611.jpg) Title: Re: unexpected pregnancy Post by: Privateer on February 17, 2009, 09:31:25 PM well she saw the OB last week and he thinks everything will be OK. Did an ultrasound and heartbeat was there, so that's one hurdle. She's about 8 weeks now; due in september. I'm still pretty freaked out about this.. mostly afraid I'll have another girl.. In my immediate family, there are 10 people. Me and my dad are the only men. Be nice to have a boy, but a girl would be fine as well. At this point I'm more concerned with the.. developmental.. problems that children of older mothers have a higher chance of getting.
so healthy is #1. don't get me wrong. I'm fine with whatever comes out. The other two girls are excited about it, and only a little worried about sharing a room. Mostly about whose room do they move into and what color are the walls going to be painted. more details as more develop. Thanks again for he support. Broke the news to the boss today. Hopefully that will subconsciously keep me from getting laid off (which is really where my fear is rooted. Two years ago, i would've just found a new job.. but now...) Andy Title: Re: unexpected pregnancy Post by: DarkStaR on February 17, 2009, 11:33:01 PM I'll still be 32 when my oops graduates high school this year.
He knows he's an oops. At least we got to kinda grow up together. [thumbsup] Title: Re: unexpected pregnancy Post by: swampduc on February 18, 2009, 06:28:33 AM Again, congrats, Privateer. I can understand you being worried, but look at it this way: older moms have a higher rate of developmental probs, but overall, it's still a really low rate. Anyway, we'll be thinking about you. Good luck.
Title: Re: unexpected pregnancy Post by: Grampa on February 18, 2009, 07:45:38 AM I see a baby bear in somebodys future. ;D
lm says " congrats! " Title: Re: unexpected pregnancy Post by: Privateer on March 29, 2009, 09:56:29 AM so brief update.
after two sonograms, things seem to be OK. First one showed the nose bones (lack of indicates down's syndrome), 2nd one at the hospital pre-natal diagnostic center showed some fluid space in the neck that was normal thickness. They took some of the wife's blood to test for chromosomal markers (didn't take any from me tho, strangely). We've yet to hear back from those. I'm still getting used to the idea, but I'm not debilitated by the freak-out like I was before. If I can only make it through this calendar year without getting laid off... I'm hoping against hope of a boy. I'd like one more dude around here to even up the odds. thanks again for all the kind words. more news as more develops. andy Title: Re: unexpected pregnancy Post by: Duck-Stew on March 29, 2009, 10:12:29 AM Warm wishes sent from Ventura county Andy... So glad everyone's doing fine...
Take care, and breathe every once in a while... [thumbsup] --Stu Title: Re: unexpected pregnancy Post by: Privateer on August 27, 2009, 09:20:04 PM 36 weeks.
(http://img248.imageshack.us/img248/6321/sonogram1.jpg) (http://img248.imageshack.us/i/sonogram1.jpg/) Definitely a girl. No big deal. Healthy kid is all I ask. Haven't settled on a name yet. We're deciding between Claire Megan or Jillian Megan Title: Re: unexpected pregnancy Post by: Big Troubled Bear on August 27, 2009, 09:30:06 PM Congrats on being the only man in the house, My oops will be 4 in 3 weeks, and at least foe now I am still his hero................
...................when Transformers are not on the telly ;D Title: Re: unexpected pregnancy Post by: mitt on August 28, 2009, 07:31:41 AM looking good already!
mitt Title: Re: unexpected pregnancy Post by: swampduc on August 28, 2009, 08:06:52 AM Both really pretty names. Congrats!
Butterflies any better yet? ;) Title: Re: unexpected pregnancy Post by: Grampa on August 28, 2009, 09:05:09 AM [clap]
Title: Re: unexpected pregnancy Post by: Langanobob on August 28, 2009, 12:24:33 PM dont tell the kid He Man, I think you might have been joking, but...this can be a very serious issue. My brother-in-law was an "ooops" kid and during his childhood his parents never let him forget that he wasn't wanted. He came out sort of OK, but it has to have left a mark. The first four kids were raised very well, it seems like the parents were just completely burned out on kids when the last one came along. I know this doesn't relate to the present case, but just thought I'd put it out here. Title: Re: unexpected pregnancy Post by: Got Duc on August 28, 2009, 01:27:27 PM God bless you!
I wish this would happen for us. We even spent money on the baby process. Enough to have a Desmosedici! I am not trying to make anyone feel bad or feel bad for me but mistake, accident whatever you may call it it is a blessing! Congrats on your unexpected news! [thumbsup] Title: Re: unexpected pregnancy Post by: somegirl on August 28, 2009, 05:13:35 PM Glad to hear all is going well. [thumbsup]
Title: Re: unexpected pregnancy Post by: red baron on August 29, 2009, 06:25:44 AM Congrats [thumbsup]
Title: Re: unexpected pregnancy Post by: Privateer on August 29, 2009, 08:45:21 AM God bless you! I wish this would happen for us. We even spent money on the baby process. Enough to have a Desmosedici! I am not trying to make anyone feel bad or feel bad for me but mistake, accident whatever you may call it it is a blessing! Congrats on your unexpected news! [thumbsup] thanks. We struggled with the first two which is why this one was such a surprise and which is why I was so completely freaked out. I'm over it now and of course I'll love her like my other two. I wish the best for you. You might be surprised about what life has in store for you. I sure was. Title: Re: unexpected pregnancy Post by: killaimdie on August 29, 2009, 02:46:46 PM Hurray for accidental children!
LOLs for posting pics of hot daughter. Title: Re: unexpected pregnancy Post by: TiNi on August 30, 2009, 05:07:37 AM best wishes sent :)
i like babies :) Title: Re: unexpected pregnancy Post by: hooligan machinist on August 30, 2009, 08:06:42 AM Hell yeah!
Congrats Andy! [thumbsup] Kids are great. We have three also, girl-16, girl-7, boy-5. Sure, i'll be in a wheelchair by the time my son graduates high school, but i wouldn't change a thing. Title: Re: unexpected pregnancy Post by: Betty Rage on August 30, 2009, 09:18:49 AM Congrats! Our little one was a bit of an "oops" as well but he's the best thing that's ever happened to us. My husband was 40 when he was born. Sure, he'll be old when Rowan is in college but I don't think that will make much of a difference. Oh and I LOVE the name Claire. ;)
Title: Re: unexpected pregnancy Post by: rgramjet on August 30, 2009, 03:04:08 PM God bless you! I wish this would happen for us. We even spent money on the baby process. Enough to have a Desmosedici! I am not trying to make anyone feel bad or feel bad for me but mistake, accident whatever you may call it it is a blessing! Congrats on your unexpected news! [thumbsup] Our 3.5 year old twins ended up costing 1098R money to conceive.....funny way of putting it. Good Luck! Title: Re: unexpected pregnancy Post by: mitt on August 30, 2009, 03:46:08 PM Congrats! Our little one was a bit of an "oops" as well but he's the best thing that's ever happened to us. My husband was 40 when he was born. Sure, he'll be old when Rowan is in college but I don't think that will make much of a difference. Oh and I LOVE the name Claire. ;) My dad was 50 when I was born. I kept him young for his age ;D mitt Title: Re: unexpected pregnancy Post by: The Don on August 30, 2009, 06:30:53 PM I was 38 when I had my first and only child, knowing what i know now I wish I had started earlier and had three kids, I am envious of you and wish you luck well done.
Don Title: Re: unexpected pregnancy Post by: Privateer on September 21, 2009, 04:38:53 PM Again thank you everyone for your good thoughts and advice.
Sunday we went into the hospital and today we got this. Claire Megan (http://web.me.com/michaelwking/iWeb/Michael%20King%27s%20web%20home/Baby%20Claire_files/IMG_0716.jpg) 11:30am, 6lbs 11oz, 20 1/2 inches Yes, that is a Ducati Meccanica shirt I'm wearing. Title: Re: unexpected pregnancy Post by: mitt on September 21, 2009, 04:41:30 PM Awesome! What a cutie!
Congrats! [drink] mitt Title: Re: unexpected pregnancy Post by: Grampa on September 21, 2009, 04:46:34 PM somebody needs a bear [cheeky]
Title: Re: unexpected pregnancy Post by: River on September 21, 2009, 05:23:42 PM Congrats! How precious she is...
[clap] Title: Re: unexpected pregnancy Post by: Privateer on September 21, 2009, 05:34:10 PM somebody needs a Three girls? Yes, I need a beer. Title: Re: unexpected pregnancy Post by: Stella on September 21, 2009, 05:45:47 PM Awesome! Many congrats to you, your wife and daughters! It appears that Claire is giving you "that" look already. ;)
Title: Re: unexpected pregnancy Post by: SheMonster on September 21, 2009, 05:53:26 PM That look? It looks like the one that says "Daddy, can I have a pony?" :D Congratulations!
Title: Re: unexpected pregnancy Post by: ducpainter on September 21, 2009, 05:59:41 PM Congratulations....
but you're doomed as doomed can be. ;) Title: Re: unexpected pregnancy Post by: Grampa on September 21, 2009, 06:02:50 PM Congratulations, Andy! She is beautiful!!
~Michelle Title: Re: unexpected pregnancy Post by: swampduc on September 21, 2009, 06:39:26 PM She's lovely! Congrats!
Title: Re: unexpected pregnancy Post by: Betty Rage on September 21, 2009, 06:55:43 PM What a happy day for you!! Congrats!!
Title: Re: unexpected pregnancy Post by: somegirl on September 21, 2009, 07:16:42 PM Congrats! [beer]
Title: Re: unexpected pregnancy Post by: Randimus Maximus on September 21, 2009, 07:26:13 PM Don't have much else to say but, congrats! [thumbsup]
Title: Re: unexpected pregnancy Post by: Big Troubled Bear on September 21, 2009, 10:51:45 PM CONGRATS!!!!!!!!!! Title: Re: unexpected pregnancy Post by: TiNi on September 22, 2009, 12:44:52 AM congratulations! she's beautiful :)
Title: Re: unexpected pregnancy Post by: Gator on September 22, 2009, 04:35:44 AM Way to go.
Did you teach her any tricks yet? Title: Re: unexpected pregnancy Post by: DesmoDiva on September 22, 2009, 04:42:42 AM Congrats to the new parents. [thumbsup] [beer]
Title: Re: unexpected pregnancy Post by: bluemoco on September 22, 2009, 05:49:00 AM [beer]
Congratulations. Glad to hear that mom + new daughter are happy and healthy. [thumbsup] Title: Re: unexpected pregnancy Post by: Howie on September 22, 2009, 06:34:13 AM Congrats!!
Title: Re: unexpected pregnancy Post by: Buckethead on September 22, 2009, 05:30:26 PM You're outnumbered! :o RUUUUUUN!!!!!
Ahem... What I meant to say was: Congrats! [beer] Title: Re: unexpected pregnancy Post by: dolci on September 23, 2009, 08:20:17 AM congratulations - she's beautiful. [clap]
Title: Re: unexpected pregnancy Post by: Duck-Stew on September 23, 2009, 10:02:55 AM Indeed Andy. Beautiful. Many heart-felt congrats! [thumbsup] [beer] [wine] [clap]
Title: Re: unexpected pregnancy Post by: Privateer on September 25, 2009, 12:51:32 PM thanks again, everyone. It always amazes me how a group of strangers can grow to care and know each other so well, even when some of us (myself included) don't always get along well with others. Your warm thoughts and well wishes mean a lot to me, and remind me to be nicer to people here and in RL.
We're slowly adjusting life with an infant and all their assorted accessories. Luckily I'm off work for 2 weeks and the wife is on disability for a while. Donations to college and wedding savings accounts are now being accepted. Monster parts and/or custom work is also accepted in lieu of cash ;) Andy edit: forgot this (http://img199.imageshack.us/img199/554/claireday2.jpg) (http://img199.imageshack.us/i/claireday2.jpg/) Title: Re: unexpected pregnancy Post by: Buckethead on September 25, 2009, 02:22:44 PM She's what, a week old, and she's already practicing "The Wave?!"
Coolest babeh ever. [thumbsup] Title: Re: unexpected pregnancy Post by: Privateer on September 28, 2009, 08:21:47 PM and I sealed the deal tonight...
(http://photos-f.ak.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ak-snc1/hs229.snc1/7634_1236877887295_1389679964_671509_545047_n.jpg) Title: Re: unexpected pregnancy Post by: swampduc on September 29, 2009, 05:29:52 AM Tattoo, huh?
Well, I guess now you've got to keep her ;D |