Ducati Monster Forum

Kitchen Sink => No Moto Content => Topic started by: Johnny OrganDonor on March 16, 2010, 07:40:02 AM

Title: Assholes
Post by: Johnny OrganDonor on March 16, 2010, 07:40:02 AM

I came to the realization a few years ago that I'd arrived at a point in life where I no longer had to deal with assholes and that there were really no assholes (or any difficult people) infecting my life any longer.  By asshole, I'm not necessarily talking about a difficult, abrasive, abusive, demanding, etc individual (aka douchebag.)  I think an asshole is someone who actually enjoys being difficult, abrasive, abusive, demanding, etc (douchebaggy) without invitation, hesitation, or reservation. 

I'd guess that maybe 1 in 20 people are assholes.  Are they born that way or do life experiences just twist them into being assholes?  Is there any excuse for being an asshole?  Do assholes know that they're assholes or do they just think that everyone else is an asshole?  Does acting like an asshole make one an asshole?  Although there are more than 20 members, I'm sure that there are no assholes on the DMF (a statistical anomaly perhaps) but I think there's a great deal of collective wisdom here on dealing with assholes and I'd like to hear opinions and stories.


(http://i327.photobucket.com/albums/k445/majmontana/bombsquad1.jpg)
Title: Re: Assholes
Post by: muskrat on March 16, 2010, 07:42:09 AM
my motto in dealing with them is:  Don't go to bed mad, stay up late and plot your revenge.  [cheeky]
Title: Re: Assholes
Post by: duccarlos on March 16, 2010, 07:47:10 AM
I thought this would be a roll call of assholes.

And to that I can only say "here"!
Title: Re: Assholes
Post by: Speedbag on March 16, 2010, 08:18:54 AM
Quote from: duccarlos on March 16, 2010, 07:47:10 AM
I thought this would be a roll call of assholes.

And to that I can only say "here"!

+1
Title: Re: Assholes
Post by: Popeye the Sailor on March 16, 2010, 08:22:24 AM
Quote from: Speedbag on March 16, 2010, 08:18:54 AM
+1

+2!  ;D
Title: Re: Assholes
Post by: NoisyDante on March 16, 2010, 08:24:05 AM
There were too many assholes to name back when I was in highschool, and in my last months of college my girlfriend dumped me for my supposed best friend, such an asshole.  I've had my share of assholes for a lifetime, but unfortunately in my line of business there's one everywhere you look.  I believe it is a power thing, those who maybe did not have much earlier in life now want to exact it upon others.

The motto I adopted back in highschool is 'living well is the best revenge.'  I'm looking forward to the day that I can give the finger to all those assholes when I'm on stage winning an Oscar.

Not like I'm spiteful now, it's water under the bridge and means nothing in the long scheme of my life, but a little bit of vengeance is fine, imho.
Title: Re: Assholes
Post by: RAT900 on March 16, 2010, 10:53:46 PM
To label an individual an asshole is ostensibly to view them from your own personal perspective, ethics, worldview or value system and to determine if they fall into your personal "allowable behaviors" spectrum or outside of it

For example my ex-wife can give you every assurance that I am an asshole....my current wife will agree that I have many asshole-ish qualities but I am not a complete asshole in the classic sense

However I would offer that there is such a thing as the "Universal Asshole"....it is a near mythical/mystical creature....one who no member of the human species can tolerate....a unifying savior of sorts....one who will unite mankind in complete agreement...we await this creature's arrival....I recall a few High School Gym Teachers who I thought contended for the title...but in retrospect they were mere false prophets

Asshole-ism is a Big Tent....it encompasses the entire Pantheon of lesser and greater assholes....they do group into warring factions under the big tent....there are ones who were natural born genetically-based cretins and dipshits....Asshole-ism also encompasses evolved assholes who would require "Re-enactment Dolls" and trained therapists to chart their evolution

I strive these days to be one less asshole on the face of the earth....their number is legion and their ranks are swelling ever-more daily...and usually I am pretty good at limiting my level of offensive behavior.....

but with that being said....every now and then someone comes along and rubs me the wrong way ...and ....well you know how it goes....

At the end of the day it really does not matter "why" they are who they are....it is their actions that matter

One final thought...if you walk into a room or bar and don't readily see "The Asshole".....well there's a good chance "you're it"
Title: Re: Assholes
Post by: duc996 on March 16, 2010, 10:58:20 PM
I don't pay much attentions to assholes,they want to be that way i let them...:-) Here's to the rest of the assholes in the world  [beer]
Title: Re: Assholes
Post by: GAAN on March 16, 2010, 11:13:50 PM
rat900

Title: Re: Assholes
Post by: Mojo S2R on March 16, 2010, 11:14:53 PM
Quote from: RAT900 on March 16, 2010, 10:53:46 PM
One final thought...if you walk into a room or bar and don't readily see "The Asshole".....well there's a good chance "you're it"

[laugh]  All well said but loved that last statement.  I myself have sometimes warned people that I can be an asshole, I inform them that it depends on the situation.  I let them know that I won't take any bullshit.  When people do stupid things I become an asshole.  When someone doesn't think (especially an adult) I may become an asshole.  Many times I can let it go or try to explain things if they will listen, but sometimes it gets to a point that you have to hurt their feelings and point out that they are idiots.  Especially if people are performing unsafe acts in a professional environment and the person is an adult and should know better.  Let this be your warning  [evil]  
Title: Re: Assholes
Post by: RAT900 on March 16, 2010, 11:17:42 PM
Quote from: Mother on March 16, 2010, 11:13:50 PM
rat900



<sobbing with joy>  Mother!!!!!!    I am HOME!!!
Title: Re: Assholes
Post by: RAT900 on March 16, 2010, 11:25:31 PM
Quote from: Mojo S2R on March 16, 2010, 11:14:53 PM
[laugh]  All well said but loved that last statement.  I myself have sometimes warned people that I can be an asshole, I inform them that it depends on the situation.  I let them know that I won't take any bullshit.  When people do stupid things I become an asshole.  When someone doesn't think (especially an adult) I may become an asshole.  Many times I can let it go or try to explain things if they will listen, but sometimes it gets to a point that you have to hurt their feelings and point out that they are idiots.  Especially if people are performing unsafe acts in a professional environment and the person is an adult and should know better.  Let this be your warning  [evil]  


The broadest category...."The Circumstantial Asshole".....I am a card-carrying member of this Unitarian category.   Indeed I would again offer the example of my ex-wife....she was as close to being sexually inert as a woman can get......but was otherwise fun to be with....so I satisfied myself at whim elsewhere with bawdy women of loose virtue for a dozen or so years


The ex-wife took grave exception to my behavior...couldn't quite fathom that I did not view marriage as an opportunity to continue wanking in the shower ...hence I am her "asshole"
Title: Re: Assholes
Post by: Speedbag on March 17, 2010, 02:19:45 AM
Hey Rat, long time.....

:)
Title: Re: Assholes
Post by: ducpainter on March 17, 2010, 02:34:14 AM
Quote from: RAT900 on March 16, 2010, 10:53:46 PM
To label an individual an asshole is ostensibly to view them from your own personal perspective, ethics, worldview or value system and to determine if they fall into your personal "allowable behaviors" spectrum or outside of it

For example my ex-wife can give you every assurance that I am an asshole....my current wife will agree that I have many asshole-ish qualities but I am not a complete asshole in the classic sense

However I would offer that there is such a thing as the "Universal Asshole"....it is a near mythical/mystical creature....one who no member of the human species can tolerate....a unifying savior of sorts....one who will unite mankind in complete agreement...we await this creature's arrival....I recall a few High School Gym Teachers who I thought contended for the title...but in retrospect they were mere false prophets

Asshole-ism is a Big Tent....it encompasses the entire Pantheon of lesser and greater assholes....they do group into warring factions under the big tent....there are ones who were natural born genetically-based cretins and dipshits....Asshole-ism also encompasses evolved assholes who would require "Re-enactment Dolls" and trained therapists to chart their evolution

I strive these days to be one less asshole on the face of the earth....their number is legion and their ranks are swelling ever-more daily...and usually I am pretty good at limiting my level of offensive behavior.....

but with that being said....every now and then someone comes along and rubs me the wrong way ...and ....well you know how it goes....

At the end of the day it really does not matter "why" they are who they are....it is their actions that matter

One final thought...if you walk into a room or bar and don't readily see "The Asshole".....well there's a good chance "you're it"
See...

good things can happen when you leave the door open. ;D
Title: Re: Assholes
Post by: Howie on March 17, 2010, 02:44:52 AM
RAT900 :o :o :o :o :o

WELCOME BACK

So, were you been?  Watcha been doing?  How the hell are you?
Title: Re: Assholes
Post by: rgramjet on March 17, 2010, 03:25:26 AM
Quote from: RAT900 on March 16, 2010, 11:25:31 PM

The broadest category...."The Circumstantial Asshole".....I am a card-carrying member of this Unitarian category.   Indeed I would again offer the example of my ex-wife....she was as close to being sexually inert as a woman can get......but was otherwise fun to be with....so I satisfied myself at whim elsewhere with bawdy women of loose virtue for a dozen or so years


The ex-wife took grave exception to my behavior...couldn't quite fathom that I did not view marriage as an opportunity to continue wanking in the shower ...hence I am her "asshole"

Brilliantly Put!   [clap]
Title: Re: Assholes
Post by: Pip on March 17, 2010, 03:56:16 AM
Quote from: RAT900 on March 16, 2010, 11:25:31 PM

The broadest category...."The Circumstantial Asshole".....I am a card-carrying member of this Unitarian category.   Indeed I would again offer the example of my ex-wife....she was as close to being sexually inert as a woman can get......but was otherwise fun to be with....so I satisfied myself at whim elsewhere with bawdy women of loose virtue for a dozen or so years


The ex-wife took grave exception to my behavior...couldn't quite fathom that I did not view marriage as an opportunity to continue wanking in the shower ...hence I am her "asshole"

[laugh] [laugh] [clap] [clap] Exceedingly good return posts.   [thumbsup]
Title: Re: Assholes
Post by: Statler on March 17, 2010, 04:20:03 AM
Quote from: RAT900 on March 16, 2010, 11:25:31 PM


The ex-wife took grave exception to my behavior...couldn't quite fathom that I did not view marriage as an opportunity to continue wanking in the shower ...hence I am her "asshole"

at least by that definition there was frequent anal during the marriage.   ;)
Title: Re: Assholes
Post by: RAT900 on March 17, 2010, 04:27:44 AM
Quote from: Statler on March 17, 2010, 04:20:03 AM
at least by that definition there was frequent anal during the marriage.   ;)

LOL yes...the gift that is always better to give than to receive
Title: Re: Assholes
Post by: RAT900 on March 17, 2010, 04:33:14 AM
Quote from: howie on March 17, 2010, 02:44:52 AM
RAT900 :o :o :o :o :o

WELCOME BACK

So, were you been?  Watcha been doing?  How the hell are you?

Howie!! you were the first name search I did on this board...and it was heart warming to see you active.  I can fill you in on the Introduce Yourself  board as I don't want such an important thread as this to get jacked.
Title: Re: Assholes
Post by: duccarlos on March 17, 2010, 05:13:25 AM
This lovefest should be removed from the asshole thread, assholes.
Title: Re: Assholes
Post by: junior varsity on March 17, 2010, 05:51:50 AM
yeah, i came to report as another asshole, and you guys are ruining it. assholes.
Title: Re: Assholes
Post by: freeclimbmtb on March 17, 2010, 06:47:46 AM
Quote from: ato memphis on March 17, 2010, 05:51:50 AM
yeah, i came to report as another asshole, and you guys are ruining it. assholes.

What an asshole.
Title: Re: Assholes
Post by: DCXCV on March 17, 2010, 07:14:14 AM
Sometimes idiots think I'm an asshole.
Title: Re: Assholes
Post by: teddy037.2 on March 17, 2010, 07:19:10 AM
< denis >

I use public toilets, and I piss on the seat
I walk around in the summertime, saying, "how 'bout this heat?"

I'm an asshoooole...

< /denis >
Title: Re: Assholes
Post by: junior varsity on March 17, 2010, 07:28:04 AM
Dennis Leary - As*hole (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JTVpxxzb2Dc#lq-lq2-hq-vhq-hd)
Title: Re: Assholes
Post by: Triple J on March 17, 2010, 07:47:42 AM
Nice to see Rat900 back!!!  [thumbsup]
Title: Re: Assholes
Post by: Speedbag on March 17, 2010, 08:18:44 AM
Yeah, but he's such an.....asshole.
Title: Re: Assholes
Post by: DCXCV on March 17, 2010, 08:38:48 AM
Spaceballs: Keep Firing, Assholes! (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vOWx-8ecTTI#lq-lq2)
Title: Re: Assholes
Post by: SacDuc on March 17, 2010, 09:20:01 AM

Two words:

Deputy Inspector
Title: Re: Assholes
Post by: Grampa on March 17, 2010, 09:20:40 AM
I wanna be an ass
Title: Re: Assholes
Post by: ducpainter on March 17, 2010, 01:02:04 PM
Quote from: bobspapa on March 17, 2010, 09:20:40 AM
I wanna be an ass
You've already gotten your wish. [thumbsup]
Title: Re: Assholes
Post by: Grampa on March 17, 2010, 01:04:31 PM
Quote from: ducpainter on March 17, 2010, 01:02:04 PM
You've already gotten your wish. [thumbsup]

why thank you..... now.... can I be a real boy?





[laugh]
Title: Re: Assholes
Post by: ducpainter on March 17, 2010, 01:05:31 PM
Quote from: bobspapa on March 17, 2010, 01:04:31 PM
why thank you..... now.... can I be a real boy?





[laugh]
If you must
Title: Re: Assholes
Post by: SacDuc on March 17, 2010, 01:06:47 PM
Quote from: ducpainter on March 17, 2010, 01:02:04 PM
You've already gotten your wish. [thumbsup]

Sorry. I gotta call bullshit here. BP is the biggest sweetie. If you can be a stand up guy while bending over backwards for people, he'd be that guy. And you know it. Sorry BP you are more in the snuggle bear category than the asshole category.

sac
Title: Re: Assholes
Post by: Grampa on March 17, 2010, 01:07:54 PM
Quote from: SacDuc on March 17, 2010, 01:06:47 PM
Sorry. I gotta call bullshit here. BP is the biggest sweetie. If you can be a stand up guy while bending over backwards for people, he'd be that guy. And you know it. Sorry BP you are more in the snuggle bear category than the asshole category.

sac


damn it
Title: Re: Assholes
Post by: ducpainter on March 17, 2010, 01:09:20 PM
Quote from: SacDuc on March 17, 2010, 01:06:47 PM
Sorry. I gotta call bullshit here. BP is the biggest sweetie. If you can be a stand up guy while bending over backwards for people, he'd be that guy. And you know it. Sorry BP you are more in the snuggle bear category than the asshole category.

sac
He didn't say ass hole.

Where's Michelle...

she'll fill you in. :P

It's good Joel...

you can be an ass. ;D
Title: Re: Assholes
Post by: Grampa on March 17, 2010, 01:10:33 PM
Quote from: ducpainter on March 17, 2010, 01:09:20 PM
He didn't say ass hole.

Where's Michelle...

she'll fill you in. :P

[laugh]
Title: Re: Assholes
Post by: SacDuc on March 17, 2010, 01:14:03 PM
Quote from: ducpainter on March 17, 2010, 01:09:20 PM
He didn't say ass hole.

Where's Michelle...

she'll fill you in. :P

It's good Joel...

you can be an ass. ;D


I stand corrected.  ;D

sac
Title: Re: Assholes
Post by: Rev. Millertime on March 17, 2010, 07:19:43 PM
HERE!






<<< I even brag about it!
Title: Re: Assholes
Post by: brimo on March 17, 2010, 08:24:39 PM
Quote from: RAT900 on March 16, 2010, 10:53:46 PM<edit>
and their ranks are swelling ever-more daily..<end edit>.


Somehow that put a picture in my mind of a rank of swelling assholes....
Title: Re: Assholes
Post by: Mojo S2R on March 17, 2010, 09:11:15 PM
Quote from: brimo on March 17, 2010, 08:24:39 PM

Somehow that put a picture in my mind of a rank of swelling assholes....

Not a good picture.   [puke]  Get out of my head!  [bang]
Title: Re: Assholes
Post by: RAT900 on March 17, 2010, 10:09:22 PM
Quote from: brimo on March 17, 2010, 08:24:39 PM

Somehow that put a picture in my mind of a rank of swelling assholes....

By any chance were you ever remanded to a Turkish Prison for drug smuggling?...or employed as a Turkish prison guard?