The human heart is our set of tires, all born into us for different ways of life. Some are born for sunny days and some are born for rain. Some are born for long steady drives and some are born for racing. No matter how fast we go, what we put it through, that set of tires keeps spinning, pushing us toward some outward goal. Yet we all have a single thing in common: we only have so much traction to give. You may lose some for a bit, drift through a corner, and hell, you might even become a better driver for the scare; but you keep pushing it to the edge, pushing and wearing and always asking it to defy nature; then suddenly, as if out of nowhere, a single piece of tread gives or that seemingly innocent bump or oil slick appears as if out of nowhere and suddenly its done. You've pushed it to the edge and it won't take any more. Its not about learning from the experience, about getting up and back on the road, but this time, its about crashing; about launching into the air and tumbling and falling and destroying everything and hurting. Then the corners are never the same, you simply can't push to the same edge - the focus has changed, the threats are eminent. There are crashes you learn and grow from, and then there are those that simply leave you without traction, without tread, without anything at all to give.
Thoughts?
there are different types of tires for all situations
you choose your set by taking into account environment, geography, or the person who designed the track
no thing
be it love, loss, or a simple encounter can be properly navigated with the same set of shoes
While what you have written is quite eloquent and personally I enjoyed the read though its content is dark...
what you are describing a patch of road, a bump or an oil-slick...not the entire journey though it might seem that way at the moment.
Despair, Bitterness, Rage, and Fear make for piss-poor lifestyles and world-views...they are all forms of self-pity dressed up wearing a lot of make-up and perfume...as temporary reactions they can be comforting...momentarily...but they do not wear well over the long-haul...trust me on that one
The application of "faith" as a human coping mechanism is ultimately the only thing that can get you back on 2 legs and not leave you hopping down life's road on 1 leg pretending you are walking...I do not speak of "faith" in a religious/mythological or parochial sense...
I speak of a profound deep-soul level of faith that compels one to accept the absolute "correctness" of the events in one's life no matter how unfortunate or ugly they are....a faith that can be invoked so they can move beyond them...not resignation but rather the embrace of the pile of random crap and circumstance that accumulates to become our own unique and personal life-stories
the kind of defiant faith that gets one off their ass dusting themselves off and saying "Is that all you have you cosmic make the beast with two backser of chance?"....
a philosophical faith that enables one to metabolize events as so much shit and manure that serves to grow them into a more beautiful soul...
faith in all its forms is all we ultimately have to enable our heart/spirit/soul to be a renewable resource....
if a God works for you well run with it...I gave up on Santa Claus and Zeus a long long time ago
whatever is going on...I wish you a safe passage through it...
and here is a nice piece by William Ernest Henley that kind of explains it all.......for me at least
Invictus
Out of the night that covers me,
Black as the Pit from pole to pole,
I thank whatever gods may be
For my unconquerable soul.
In the fell clutch of circumstance
I have not winced nor cried aloud.
Under the bludgeonings of chance
My head is bloody, but unbowed.
Beyond this place of wrath and tears
Looms but the Horror of the shade,
And yet the menace of the years
Finds, and shall find, me unafraid.
It matters not how strait the gate,
How charged with punishments the scroll.
I am the master of my fate:
I am the captain of my soul.
Rat900, I agree with you. I'm not one to feel sorry for myself. In fact, I really make the beast with two backsing hate those who do, but god damn, break ups suck, and I'll be damned if I indulge in a day or two of self pity or two before I move on because its too wet to ride and what else am I going to do?
I have to admit, I thought the metaphor was a good one. I see so many damn people who seem to be on a good set of tires yet I'm always running slicks through life on a crazy deadly track and I'm damn tired. [bang]
Any set of tires will last longer if the speed is lower.
My experience is that a lower speed, at least on average, helps me experience
whatever goes on outside my bubble, better.
My bubble used to be strong, I was unbeatable and my riding pace was high.
Of course I pushed my tires too hard and they burst.
Good thing actually - I made my new tires myself and now I know I can trust them.
Lu,
while I know not the details of what hath gotten you down, it matters not. What matters is that you rotate those tires, make sure they are balanced and inflated properly and just run them with the same level of confidence and enthusiasm as you did before your offroad excursion that left you questioning the loss of traction. Living/driving with that which occurred looming in your rearview mirror leads you to not look forward or move with the same level of exuberance you once did. Keeping it filed in your mind as a learning experience is a good thing, but reliving it isn't. The road moves forward as does your vehicle as you should also. We don't drive or move in reverse, and with good reason. The tread isn't meant to roll that way, the drivetrain is less efficient in that way, and we have to crane our way in an unnatural fashion to move in that direction.
Quote from: DesmoLu on December 31, 2010, 03:48:29 AM
Rat900, I agree with you. I'm not one to feel sorry for myself. In fact, I really make the beast with two backsing hate those who do, but god damn, break ups suck, and I'll be damned if I indulge in a day or two of self pity or two before I move on because its too wet to ride and what else am I going to do?
I have to admit, I thought the metaphor was a good one. I see so many damn people who seem to be on a good set of tires yet I'm always running slicks through life on a crazy deadly track and I'm damn tired. [bang]
Lu the metaphor was concise...throw yourself the be-all/end-all pity party and then send all the guests/ghosts on their way...
Some thoughts I had at the time many years ago......
background...my (ex) wife called me at my hotel in Cali while on business to say she would not be there when I got home ...she called again the next day to tell me that my younger sister (who I was put in charge-of since I was 7 and she was 2), had committed suicide and that I might want to come home early...
I recall thinking among 11 billion other thoughts...well this is going to be one mother-make the beast with two backser of a "growth experience" and a long ugly slog through a smelly dismal emotional swamp before I get to the other side....
somehow I knew there would be an "other side"...but there sure weren't any make the beast with two backsing short-cuts to it...the worry was how long a journey it would be
a few weeks later after endless hand-wringing, self-pity, many, MANY gallons of Vodka and whining about loss of wife and kids I had a moment of clarity...an absolutely out-of-context, unexpected gem dropped into my lap...
I realized that if this marriage did not involve "the love of my life"...then I better get over her and get over myself and start looking for the real deal which had to be ahead of me
you will get there...
and maybe someday they will invent the perfect all-weather tire
oh damn, I can't begin to fathom what it would feel feel like to have my sister commit suicide and I'm damned sorry about that. the problem for me is that I did find the love of my life; hell, I was so lucky I found him twice and they both rode Ducs, but I just couldn't bring myself to compromise myself. I'm a picky idealist bastard, I'll be the first to admit it.
but I can't help but wonder, am I just meant for pushing my tires to the edge to the point of inevitable crash?
Quote from: DesmoLu on December 31, 2010, 05:32:31 AM
...........
but I can't help but wonder, am I just meant for pushing my tires to the edge to the point of inevitable crash?
No [thumbsup]
none of us has a map so all we have is luck and a decent sense of direction to lead us to decent roads. Even the best roads have a nasty pothole here and there hidden by leaves. My roads tend to be an the unusual side but generally satisfying, however I've got those plastic PowerWheels tires.
Quote from: DesmoLu on December 31, 2010, 03:48:29 AM
<snip>
I have to admit, I thought the metaphor was a good one. I see so many damn people who seem to be on a good set of tires yet I'm always running slicks through life on a crazy deadly track and I'm damn tired. [bang]
Quote from: stopintime on December 31, 2010, 05:35:23 AM
No [thumbsup]
He's right.
I'd add something I learned a while ago...
'No matter where you go...
there you are'
Look in the mirror...the answer lies deep inside.
Quote from: humorless dp on December 31, 2010, 05:45:02 AM
I'd add something I learned a while ago...
'No matter where you go...
there you are'
Look in the mirror...the answer lies deep inside.
based on that rule, I seem to be in the bathroom whenever I look
Quote from: lethe on December 31, 2010, 05:47:34 AM
based on that rule, I seem to be in the bathroom whenever I look
There's a whole world outside your bathroom.
Quote from: humorless dp on December 31, 2010, 05:57:28 AM
There's a whole world outside your bathroom.
YEAH, but sometimes...nothing is cozier than a "Calgon-take me awayyyyy..." bubble bath!!!...LOL
Quote from: humorless dp on December 31, 2010, 05:57:28 AM
There's a whole world outside your bathroom.
but mirrors aren't as common on the road so I'm not sure if I'm there. The car and bike mirrors show where I supposedly was. Everywhere I was has backwards letters.
My tires are all mis-matched with varying levels of wear..... ;)
Quote from: Speedbag on December 31, 2010, 06:09:34 AM
My tires are all mis-matched with varying levels of wear..... ;)
one of those deals with a big mud tire on one side and a racing slick on the other?
Yep.
Quote from: lethe on December 31, 2010, 06:13:46 AM
one of those deals with a big mud tire on one side and a racing slick on the other?
Don't leave out the donut spare
Quote from: RAT900 on December 31, 2010, 06:14:30 AM
Don't leave out the donut spare
A few road side plugs and a can of fix-a-flat too ;D
mitt
Quote from: mitt on December 31, 2010, 06:21:52 AM
A few road side plugs and a can of fix-a-flat too ;D
mitt
On the donut tire that is pushing 8K miles...all high speed
So, this thread didn't give me any insight at all on which tires I should put on my 2000 Chevy Impala with the basic stamped steel rims, to give me the best all weather performance.
Having said that, your heart is much tougher than you give it credit for. When I have been in similar situations, what worked for me, is to give myself a day or a week of self pity, but then, start up again. Do something that tires me to the bones. Shovel snow, exercise bike, whatever. Bonus point if it is constructive too Extra bonus points if it helps someone worse off than yourself. Then I eat a meal I like and get some sleep, and do it again. When I find myself down in the dumps for longer than I should be after a setback, I find it is usually because I let that setback knock me out of a healthy routine, and I stop doing what I like to do.
Quote from: 77south on December 31, 2010, 09:17:46 AM
So, this thread didn't give me any insight at all on which tires I should put on my 2000 Chevy Impala with the basic stamped steel rims, to give me the best all weather performance.
go take a looksee at what the Po-Po put on their Impala's and that should be just the ticket!!!
Nate's a retread ;D
While my own break-up of the century (over 10 years ago) was the biggest suck ever, I found that had that not happened, I never would have met the people I did â€" some of whom I have become very very close with, I never would have moved to where I felt most at peace (excluding my dad's porch, swinging with him), I never would have gotten a Duc, never would have experienced so many things because of all that pain...
Like shoes, you need different tire treads for different purposes. You can't run (efficiently) in make the beast with two backs-me shoes and you can't climb rocks in tennis shoes. Knobbies for trails, slicks for track. All seasons don't cut it (for me).
Hugs; good food, wine, friends, sleep and the right treads to you.
[thumbsup] [beer]
Actually, what I really need are a new set of tires, straight up. He literally used up my tread on my front completely (never let an s.o (b) borrow your bike).
But away from the literal, thanks for the words of encouragement. I was trying to be poetic since I hadn't been in such a long time.
Quote from: MrIncredible on December 31, 2010, 02:22:11 PM
Nate's a retread ;D
[laugh] [clap]
Quote from: DesmoLu on January 01, 2011, 06:41:14 PM
Actually, what I really need are a new set of tires, straight up. He literally used up my tread on my front completely (never let an s.o (b) borrow your bike).
This is why my wife checks out her tires when I return her bike. I've done terrible things to the Strada on the rear...
JM