Your best story

[SacDuc]

That's your best story? That?

Seriously. Did you tell that hooligan to stay off of your lawn too? Punk kids nowadays, why I tell ya' . . .

If your next story does not involve a full bottle of guaro we will be very disappointed in you young man.

sac

[DanTheMan]

If your next story does not involve a full bottle of guaro we will be very disappointed in you young man.

sac

And not even one Pura Vida!

[cyrus buelton]

And not even one Pura Vida!

It's funny how they turned their small country way of living into their tourism motto.



Honestly guys, sorry, I don't really have any good stories from CR. We didn't travel too much around to get in any compromising situations. Sure, we saw some 65 year old gringo pick up a prostitute, but that is legal and common there.

I did get it on with my wife in the pool our last night there while a hundred or so people were at the bar, but I am not sure that is much of an accomplishment as that is very busch league and something you do when your 18.

[badgalbetty]

that wasn't your wife that was the pool boy.
damn!wrong thread again, I am sorry I thought this was the "Jud-Me Me Me thread". Really sorry everyone.

[ducatiz]

that wasn't your wife that was the pool boy.
damn!wrong thread again, I am sorry I thought this was the "Jud-Me Me Me thread". Really sorry everyone.

[metallimonster]

that wasn't your wife that was the pool boy.
damn!wrong thread again, I am sorry I thought this was the "Jud-Me Me Me thread". Really sorry everyone.

Kind of funny that you say this.  I've come to realize that you're now the female Cyrus here.  At least with Jud we know what we're getting into.

[DanTheMan]

Can you guys take this to the pissing match thread?

[SacDuc]

Can you guys take this to the pissing match thread?

Thank you Dan. You da' man!   

All thread pissing offenders owe this thread one good story. Let's hear it.


sac

[DanTheMan]

I already posted my good story.

I gave up getting laid to chase after a friend with the Po-Po.

Doesn't get more idiotic then that.

Well then dont post if you dont have a story. 

[cyrus buelton]

Well then dont post if you dont have a story. 

My wife and I got married in Key West on a sailboat in November of 2008.

After the wedding, all of our friends and family left within a few days and we stayed down there for our honeymoon; we rented a condo in the Truman Annex (for those of you familiar with the area).

A family connection got us a free scooter for the week, which was great. I loved that chinese made piece of shit. I think it was a Hyousung or something like that. It was grey in color, along with every other scooter from that rental shop. It was actually pretty fun, but riding two up couldn't get it much over 35, but with one person you could break 42 (according to the speedometer) and also pull a wheelie by just pulling up on the front bars. But I digress.

So we head out on our last night there on the scooter, park it, and start heavily drinking to the point of a total blackout. Not even sure how many bars we went to, but we ended up at one point at the Tiniest Bar or whatever it is called with a bunch of guys from Sweden. They bought us shots, beer, you name it. Well, they wanted to hit one of the finer gentlemens clubs in Key West (I guess they don't have them in Sweden? Or they were from Norway. I don't remember), so my my bride and I decide to go.

We get there, they pay our cover, and we go on in. This is when I started to black out after the first round of shots and beers. I remember my wife showing the guy how to give the stripper a dollar bill. It was fantastic. Well, it was getting late, we had to get up relatively early as we were driving to Miami to spend the night in south beach.

Somehow good judgment prevailed and we decided not to take the scooter home, but I forgot to use the bike lock on it.

Couldn't make the beast with two backsing find the thing. We were both convinced it was parked outside Sloppy Joes, but it certainly wasn't there. We both started freaking out that the scooter had been stolen. make the beast with two backs!

so we take a cab back to our condo and then started getting all worried about the scooter, so we decide to leave again to go find it. Well, we left the Truman Annex and walked by the Green Parrot and across the street was the rental place.

So I get this great idea they re-possessed it from us because it was gifted to us for a week and I think we probably had it longer than that, so I start looking through the fence at the 100+ scooters that looked identical, but one of them sparked my fancy and totally thought it was ours.

So I decide it is a great idea to scale this 12ft fence to go see if the key would fit in the ignition. Well, I about broke my ankle landing on the pavement and from what my wife remembers, I did a few rolls upon landing. I belly crawled to the scooter (evading being seen...?) and the make the beast with two backsing key wouldn't fit. I vaguely remember getting all pissed off. Well, I wasn't going to check all of them, so I decide it probably was hidden inside, so I belly crawled back to the fence, scaled that make the beast with two backsing fence again, but this time I think I landed in some grass, but again rolled and ended up in the street.

We didn't find the scooter that night, stumbled back to our condo, do what newlyweds do, and went to sleep.

We got up in the morning, went to the parking spot and noticed the scooter was missing. We both scratched our heads and then looked at eachother and the night started to come back to us.............

So we went and wrote down what we thought in order so we could somewhat piece together what the make the beast with two backs happened.

We went to the scooter shop and told them the scooter was stolen and where we parked it. They called the police, but nothing had been towed matching that description. He pretty much told us scooter theft was high and we were on the hook to pay for this piece of shit. I am enraged. Told him I'd call him in a little bit as I needed to get to the airport to get our rental car.

Wife goes back and packs us up as I take a cab to the airport to get our car.

We are pissed off at this point driving one last time down duval and Tiff goes, "Jud, let's just make one last past and see if we come across it."

I am like "Babe, it's make the beast with two backsing gone, let's leave."

Just then she starts yelling and screaming "THERE IT IS! THERE IT IS!"

sure as shit..........there it was.........parked out in front of Mr Cheapy's liquor store.

It then came back to us as I went through my wallet and found a credit card receipt from a bar right across the street from there.

So I make the scooter drive of shame back to the rental shop and told the guy "Well, we found the scooter. Whoever stole it must have just moved it......."

the guy smirked, laughed and was like "whatever dude, you got drunk and lost it"

My response: Touche

and we left key west quickly.

We were recently back there in March, but we didn't rent from the same spot as I figured there was a huge picture of "DONT RENT TO THIS ASSHOLE"