Physician, heal thyself!

[Buckethead]

Can you give me an eyeplant?

I don't look so good.

Classic.

No call sounds like heaven.

His last day at his old firm, after he'd given up hospital privileges, he stopped by Sears on his way home. He bought a bench vise, installed it in his workshop, and crushed his beeper. Slowly.

[ducpainter]

His last day at his old firm, after he'd given up hospital privileges, he stopped by Sears on his way home. He bought a bench vise, installed it in his workshop, and crushed his beeper. Slowly.

Talk about classic....

I think I'd like your dad...

even though he's one of...

them.

[Buckethead]

There was some gallows-humor joking among the kids while he was in the OR/ICU, mostly about who would get his car if he died. I guess he got wind of it and figured he'd turn it to his advantage. I got the following email yesterday.

Subject: Automotive Inheritance.

Loving Children,

In order to avoid  a repeat of the recent unseemly debate over who will inherit the Cadillac or whatever prime or classic motorized assistive mobility device I am using on my death, I have instructed my executor, herewith, to award the vehicle to whichever of my natural issue has the most points as determined by the following formula:

       (A + B) x C*

Where:
    A = Total dollars of educational expenses repaid / Last two digits of the year of repayment ( ie. 2010 payments count twice as much as 2020 payments)

    B = Percentage of total educational debt repaid,

    C = Cumulative post high school GPA.

*Thanks BCS

First place will receive the Cadillac or whatever luxury vehicle I then own.

Second place will receive be the vehicle formerly known as Old Green, aka Old Blue.

Third place will be uncontested title to any full or partial containers of automotive fluids ( gasoline, motor oil, antifreeze, windshield wiper fluid, brake fluid, Rain X, Turtle Wax or other similar substance) in the garage at the time of my death.

This way everyone wins and I can see a potential  increased value to my estate of $ 400,000 to $500,000.




                                                                                            Sig.   John H. Gilbert   

Subscribed and sworn to before me this ______ day of  ________________, ________.


                                                                                            __________________
                                                                                                    Notary Public

I laughed so hard I almost peed myself.

Suffice it to say, he's recovering just fine.

[Monsterlover]

[sisca77]