Monster in Denmark. Just one idiot this time.

Started by CETME, June 03, 2009, 05:35:33 PM

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spolic

Why does the girl in the second picture look like she is fixing to cop a squat?
He man, where are all the ads?

duclvr


Bun-bun

"A fanatic is a man who does what he knows God would do, if only god had all the facts of the matter" S.M. Stirling

roy-nexus-6

Quote from: Bun-bun on June 04, 2009, 01:50:16 PM
I go to Denmark every year, I rather enjoy the jungles, mountains and velociraptors, and naturally, Denmark provides all those things.

[clap]

Eagerly awaiting the next instalment.   [thumbsup]

CETME

BANG!

"Not funny" I said, as my uncle laughed.
"just kidding, just start your bike" he replied, holding his belly from heaving out of his body from laughter.

So I thumbed the starter and BOOM!


of course it started!

As cocky as I am with this bike, I have to admit, how on earth did it start? I didn't do ANYTHING to the gas, shouldn't it have turned into Gak (remember that stuff?) by now? Everyone predicted that I would have a huge problem on my hands starting the bike, but it fired up as if I had just ridden it an hour ago. Fantastic! Now I know that all you have to do to "winterize" a bike is to forget what day it is.

I said goodbye to my aunt and uncle and off I went to get some fresh gas in the bike. They had 100 octane gas, so I treated the Ducati to the good stuff.


100 miles down the road, I stop to because I was hungry, and I wanted to complain about it to myself in peace. Here I am checking my pack for the 17th time in case some food just appeared since the last 16 times I checked in there:


I made it home with little issue...... I know! crazy! So I spent the next few days exploring my mom's neighborhood:




Move it sheep!








As I was walking along the beach, this guy swam up to me, got out of the ocean, walked across the beach, onto my path and tried to bite me! Some harsh American language made him think twice. That's right you modern dinosaur, you best recognize...


Well, remember those belts? Not changed in 8yrs? well I brought some with me.....


2001 Monster S4
2004 Aprilia Tuono
1992 Honda Nighthawk 750

IZ

LOL! Can't wait to get home to see these pics!!
2018 Scrambler 800 "Argento"
2010 Monster 1100 "Niro" 
2003 Monster 620 "Scuro"



Quote from: bobspapa on May 29, 2011, 08:09:57 AMThis just in..IZ is not that short..and I am not that tall.


causeofkaos

dude if all of your write-ups are this good im gonna have to do a search for all things CETME
Favorite convo i read on this board
"PICS OR IT DIDNT HAPPEN"
"F**K U IT HAPPENED"

Suzuki Blvd M109R " Sliver " = assassinated by cager
PW 696 " Pearl " = traded in
M1100 " Loki " = Viking God of mischief ( Goddess in this case )
Life is not a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving in a pretty pristine body, but rather to come in sliding sideways all used up screaming F*CK YEAH WHAT A RDIE!!

bluemoco

Your mom's neighborhood looks very nice.   [thumbsup]   Brings back fond memories of my visit to Hornbaek a year ago.
"I'm the guy who does his job. You must be the other guy." - Donnie Wahlberg in "The Departed"

"America is all about speed.  Hot, nasty, badass speed." --Eleanor Roosevelt, 1936

Fox

Quote from: causeofkaos on June 08, 2009, 07:17:24 PM
dude if all of your write-ups are this good im gonna have to do a search for all things CETME

I highly recomend it. Also check ADVrider.com cause there are a couple of classic stories there that did not make it to this board.
2008 KTM Duke 690

Monsterlover

"The Vincent was like a bullet that went straight; the Ducati is like the magic bullet in Dallas that went sideways and hit JFK and the Governor of Texas at the same time."--HST    **"A man who works with his hands is a laborer.  A man who works with his hands and his brain is a craftsman.  A man who works with his hands, brains, and heart is an artist."  -Louis Nizer**

CETME

#26
So I went in my tool bucket to find out what I had with me:


Turns out I had ALREADY BOUGHT BELTS LAST YEAR!  what a moron, who does that? Who forgets that they have already spent $200 (a completely ridiculous amount) on belts?! If there was a crowbar nearby, I would have shoved it up my nose as punishment. Alas, there was none, so I resorted to just verbally abusing myself with compliments.

Nevertheless, I start taking off any bolts I see on the bike, hoping I'll eventually remove the right ones. This is the result:
Out with the old!


In with the new!


I had everything finished in an hour or two. Then I sat and wondered how I would gather the courage to thumb the starter... This again?! wasn't I just here?

I squinted my eyes and frowned my face as I thumbed the starter button. To my surprise and delight it simply started up! I did it right! So now that I had a working bike, what next? None of my friends could come with me this year, which begged the question: What would I do on my own?! Well, there's only one answer to that. Go on a roadtrip.

But a roadtrip to where?! So I sat for three minutes and thought:
I could go south, to France/Spain/Italy where the women are pretty and they wear next to nothing, OR i could go north to Sweden/Norway/Finland, where the women are in fact Reindeer (true story) and they wear absolutely nothing.
2001 Monster S4
2004 Aprilia Tuono
1992 Honda Nighthawk 750

greenohawk69

Quote from: ducatizzzz on June 03, 2009, 06:34:44 PM
not that i really want to know, but how do you specifically know about bear semen?

just curious...did you work in the circus?

...there is a bear joke that ends with the bear saying, "...you're not really here for the hunting are you?"   ;D
"An enlightened people, and an energetic public opinion... will control and enchain the aristocratic spirit of the government." --Thomas Jefferson to Chevalier de Ouis, 1814

There are 4 boxes to be used in the defense of liberty:  Soap, Ballot, Jury and Ammo.  Please use in this order.  -- Ed Howdershelt

CETME

#28
I decided to go visit some friends, and that the question of where i'd go would be answered over a few beers. Little did I know, however, that it would answer itself.

Copenhagen bound:




I think I was probably doing close to 100mph here...


I can't tell you how awesome it is to ride bikes here. The roads are just a series of curves tied into other curves. I don't have any pictures to illustrate this, but imagine trying to swerve piles of puke in the parking lot at a Michael Bolton concert at 50mph.

I was enjoying the ride immensely until I caught up to a giant bus. I quickly grew tired of staring at it's fat ass and dropped two cogs and twisted the throttle. With the 916 exploding the serenity of the Danish countryside, I accelerated to 100mph, rocketing passed the bus. Then all of a sudden:  BANG!
2001 Monster S4
2004 Aprilia Tuono
1992 Honda Nighthawk 750

CETME

Quote from: ducatizzzz on June 03, 2009, 06:34:44 PM
not that i really want to know, but how do you specifically know about bear semen?

just curious...did you work in the circus?

The '90's was the decade of experimentation for a boy like myself.
2001 Monster S4
2004 Aprilia Tuono
1992 Honda Nighthawk 750