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[Speedbag]

Heehee....JudDddd went to Chuck E. Cheese....to score. 

[cyrus buelton]

Heehee....JudDddd went to Chuck E. Cheese....to score. 

That wasn't the original plan for the night, but that is what it turned in to.........


but yeah, ok..............I ended up at Chuck e Cheese in an attempt to score, got drunk off cheap beer and talked shit to a 9 year old.


Life doesn't get much more pathetic than that.

[SacDuc]

That wasn't the original plan for the night, but that is what it turned in to.........


but yeah, ok..............I ended up at Chuck e Cheese in an attempt to score, got drunk off cheap beer and talked shit to a 9 year old.


Life doesn't get much more pathetic than that.

All would have been redeemed with sex in the ball crawl, but alas, you fail.

sac


/why are the whack-a-mole and joystick jokes not on the tip of my tongue?
//I'm slipping

[cyrus buelton]

All would have been redeemed with sex in the ball crawl, but alas, you fail.

sac


/why are the whack-a-mole and joystick jokes not on the tip of my tongue?
//I'm slipping

I think the ball crawl's were removed by that point in time. Also, I am sort of a germ a phobe and that ball pit is a breeding ground of fecal material and urine.



bwaaaaaaaaaaa

[ducatiz]

I think the ball crawl's were removed by that point in time. Also, I am sort of a germ a phobe and that ball pit is a breeding ground of fecal material and urine.



bwaaaaaaaaaaa

why?

doesn't everyone like poo on their balls?

[cyrus buelton]

why?

doesn't everyone like poo on their balls?

How did I figure you'd chime in?

I personally don't.

[rgramjet]

How did I figure you'd chime in?

I personally don't.

Whats worse, poo on the balls or breast feeding?

[ducatiz]

How did I figure you'd chime in?

I personally don't.

so i guess you get all mad when you get a cleveland steamer

[Triple J]

but yeah, ok..............I ended up at Chuck e Cheese in an attempt to score, got drunk off cheap beer and talked shit to a 9 year old.

No more giving Randall shit about Wal Mart!! 

[cyrus buelton]

Whats worse, poo on the balls or breast feeding?

Different arguments for both exist.

I'd get into my detail of the two, but it would be completely worthless and most importantly.......boring as all hell.

so i guess you get all mad when you get a cleveland steamer

Yes, you know how I love someone shitting on my stomach.............you should know, you did proposition me once for that.

No more giving Randall shit about Wal Mart!! 

Incorrect good sir.

The girl and I had plans. I knew her. They just got changed.

Randal claims to have picked the chicks up at Walmart.

Henceforth, to make the story the same, I would have gone to Chuck e Cheese alone (creeeepppyyyy) and met some girls.


However, I believe Randall's story was proved to be false based on photo evidence he supplied.

[metallimonster]

It's a long one but worth it.
    The story of how metallimonster blacked out 3 times in one day otherwise known as the craziest day of my life. 
   For those of you who do not know, Athens Ohio is a small college down nestled in the Hocking Hills area of the South East part of the state near WV (close to Double Eagle).  It's a stunningly beautiful campus surrounded by hill covered trees and a small river.  Like many other small college towns there is not much to do but drink and drinking is what Athens does best.  There are 23 bars on two blocks downtown and just about nothing else other than the school and a movie theatre. 
     Every May there is a block party called Palmer Fest known for huge parties and rowdy crowds.  3 years ago I was abruptly woken up from my previous nights drunken slumber by a large pitcher of ice cold water (I was sleeping on a couch outside) and my friends telling me it was time to start Palmer  fest.  Sometimes we get beautiful weather in May in Ohio and this was one of those days.  Sunny and mid 80s so we knew there was going to be some good “sightseeing”.   At 7:30 am we started playing beer pong with cherry bombs instead of beer by 10:30 myself and 5 friends had blacked out and after destroying a desk we found down the street, passed out for a “nap”.  Round one went to Vodka.
     A bunch more of our friends showed up around 1:30, woke us up and we all grilled out while playing cornhole.  I was actually feeling pretty good at this point so we started hitting the cherry bombs again.  Feeling pretty good we decided to head over to Palmer Fest.  As we left the house we noticed the neighbors (including the craziest dude I've ever met who went by Wilson) in a group at different house across the street. Turns out someone dared Wilson to take a shit in the yard which he promptly walked across the street and dropped a HUGE loaf right by the porch.  We couldn't believe what we were seeing and while we were dying laughing the shit lawns occupant (who was a BIG dude) came storming out yelling at Wilson.  Bad idea.  Wilson (sans shorts) wasted no time in repeatedly punching the guy in the face screaming “I'm Wilson I can do whatever the make the beast with two backs I want”.  Seriously crazy dude.  We booked it out of there before the cops came and headed 2 streets over to Palmer.    This is where shit got crazy. 
       We had a friend who lived in a big 2 story house right in the middle of Palmer that was having multiple kegs.  By the time we got there the sidewalks and houses were all packed (for some reason the city doesn't shut down the street) and there were hot girls wearing basically nothing EVERYWHERE.  Athens has to have the hottest girls in Ohio hands down.  As we started pounding keg beer, my buddy surprised us all by pulling a water balloon launcher out of his bookbag.  We proceeded to nail (or try to nail) every hot girl we saw with water balloons off the balcony.  We must have gone through 500 balloons and I can't begin to describe how much fun we had pissing girls (and their boyfriends) off. This also kicked off a street long water gun/balloon fight.  During the middle of the balloon barrage a dude with his family in the car decided to drive down Palmer and was being a dick to people in the street by honking and getting close to hitting them.  My buddy took aim and nailed the c pillar drenching the dude's kids in the back seat.  The guy slammed on the breaks and got out of the car screaming at us (which we thought was even more hilarious) which left him open to about 100 people with squirt guns and a hose.  Needless to say we ruined his day along with a lot of other peoples.  Yeah we were dicks but we were having the time of our lives.  I really don't have the ability to stop drinking when I start so by 6 or so I was blacked out again.  My friend followed me as I went into a bedroom and proceeded to piss out a window which I didn't realize (or probably care) was overtop a huge group of people waiting for kegs.  Luckily for me squirt guns and hoses masked my piss or I would have gotten a beat down.  I then crawled under a futon to pass out.  Round 2 goes to beer
    If you've never blacked out before, the worst part is waking up and not knowing where the make the beast with two backs you are.  I came to around 9 still drunk and managed to stumble back home where half of my friends were passed out again.  I got a little payback with cold water and we ordered pizza.  I should have just went back to sleep but the pizza sobered us up and we decided to hit the bars, specifically the Junction home of the infamous Junction Punch or as we liked to call it black out juice.  Junction Punch is a wonderfully tasty drink in a red plastic cup consisting of 4 types of liquor a splash of grenadine and a squirt of sprite.  At $2.25 a piece, one will get you buzzed,2 drunk, and 3 blacked out.  I'm sure I had more than 3 but can't remember because I once again blacked out around midnight.   While at the Junction I took my shirt off (I'm not the fittest dude), pissed in a corner (see a pattern?), and got in a fight with the juke box.  My friend loves to tell the story of me throwing elbows and knees at it.  Needless to say I got kicked out.  I was off and going before my friends could get to me.  Next thing I know I'm waking up in a graveyard at 4 in the morning- across town.  Round 3 goes to Junction Punch.  My friends were relieved when I stumbled through the door.

     I've had many crazy stories but not one 24 hour period where so much crazy random shit happened. 

[SacDuc]

Thank you for getting this thread back on track.


This is awesome:

  We proceeded to nail (or try to nail) every hot girl we saw . . .

This is an awesome piece of poor (great?) decision making:

  We proceeded to nail (or try to nail) every hot girl we saw with water balloons off the balcony.

Kudos to you sir!   


sac

[metallimonster]

It was awesome.  We had at least 5 guys try and come up the stairs to fight us but they were all talk because we had like 20 dudes on the balcony.   

[cyrus buelton]

 


that's a great story, Jay.



I once had to zip up the back of a dress on a drag queen. I don't think we need to get into the details of how awkward I felt after this. Meanwhile, my wife is just sitting back at the bar laughing her ass off trying to get a picture of it.

I believe the exact words out his mouth were "Hey Honey, can you zip me up, sweetie?"



back on to Jay's story

[SacDuc]