IKEA and Starbucks & No Cigarettes

[RAT900]

Two of the most make the beast with two backsing annoying purchase experiences today

make the beast with two backs you Ikea...If I am here..... it is because I ALREADY know what I want

and because you won't make the beast with two backsing ship it to my kid's door

I do not want to be forced into wandering around

your make the beast with two backsing dim-bulb socialist culture rat-maze of chipboard shit

being forced to view your other junk...hello its called America!!!  home of the express check-out...make the beast with two backs you you make the beast with two backsing make the beast with two backsers

I won't buy any of your other shit just because you forced me to wander around amid it

on your stupid make the beast with two backsing shuffle-along pathways to mundane mediocrity


and make the beast with two backs you Starbucks.....small medium and large...end of make the beast with two backsing subject....

keep it up with the make the beast with two backsing Venti-Grande shit

and you will know what scalding bilious oily too strong coffee feels like down your shirt front

that will take that wired-smile make the beast with two backsing cheesy cheerfulness off your face

the only reason I am even in your toxic caffeine pukehole is because the guy behind the counter at Dunkin Donuts

looks like the last time he washed his hands was when he accidentally pissed on them

make the beast with two backs you make the beast with two backs you make the beast with two backs YOU ALL

[lethe]

so a hot yoga session is out of the question?

[RAT900]

so a hot yoga session is out of the question?

I am probably overdue for a severe beat-down if I keep going at this rate

[lethe]

I am probably overdue for a severe beat-down if I keep going at this rate

the problem is if you enjoy it

[Mother]

make the beast with two backs you Ikea...If I am here..... it is because I ALREADY know what I want

and because you won't make the beast with two backsing ship it to my kid's door

I do not want to be forced into wandering around

your make the beast with two backsing dim-bulb socialist culture rat-maze of chipboard shit

being forced to view your other junk...hello its called America!!!  home of the express check-out...make the beast with two backs you you make the beast with two backsing make the beast with two backsers

I won't buy any of your other shit just because you forced me to wander around amid it

on your stupid make the beast with two backsing shuffle-along pathways to mundane mediocrity

make the beast with two backs you make the beast with two backs you make the beast with two backs YOU ALL

you know that you can go straight to the self service warehouse as soon as you enter the building...right?

[Popeye the Sailor]

you know that you can go straight to the self service warehouse as soon as you enter the building...right?

Next you'll tell him they make appliances that make coffee for you in your home automatically.

[pennyrobber]

There are definitely alternatives to both. That being said, furniture shopping is akin to fondling monkey balls no matter where you go. 

[derby]

you know that you can go straight to the self service warehouse as soon as you enter the building...right?

[Howie]

you know that you can go straight to the self service warehouse as soon as you enter the building...right?

I did that the other day.  The item was not in the correct bin.

[RAT900]

you know that you can go straight to the self service warehouse as soon as you enter the building...right?

no that is news to me...but being in a blind rage about nic and about being at that junk shop to start with didn't help..... 

is there some secret make the beast with two backsing doorway that says this way for swedish meatballs or some euphemism...? (the food not the people)

I swear 3/4's of that chipboard junk will be in landfills within 5 to 7 years

anyway thanks for the tip I'll not use it next time I never make the beast with two backsing go back there

[somegirl]

All 3 times I've been to Ikea, I've ended up pissed off at the store and did not buy anything.  That's not counting the one in Budapest, that was ok.

And if I have to go to Starbucks (only when traveling or because a coworker insists on going) I only ever ask for small or medium.  I also ask for "instant oatmeal" instead of "perfect oatmeal".  Can't stand their pretentious names.

[muskrat]

 
exactly how I feel about Ikea.  Wife and I get into a knock down drag out when she says lets go get school supplies for her classroom.  HELL make the beast with two backsING NO!

[Bick]

Hey Rat, A new IKEA just opened in Denver last week!

Pulled 100's of off their normal beats to direct traffic. 

You weren't one of the 10,000 people that were camping out to be the first rat in the maze?








and



on another note






I feel your pain...











And I want to inflict it on coffee servers that use the term "tall" to describe something IZ_ish.

[AJ]

you know that you can go straight to the self service warehouse as soon as you enter the building...right?

This strategy has worked well for me multiple times. 

...
And I want to inflict it on coffee servers that use the term "tall" to describe something IZ_ish.

 

[ducpainter]

I've never been to an IKEA.

I've only been to Stabucks maybe a half dozen times.

They're on crack.

The coffee isn't worth the price.