From The Wilds Of Outer Montana

Good Day;

It's a wild and chaotic time in my life at present. Being an experienced Olde Phart, I'm somewhat used to that state of affairs and usually deal with it by consuming alcohol. Therefore, in an effort to reduce the convoluted to mere confusion, I'll start at the beginning and proceed from there.

Once upon a time, a fairly long time ago, four of us young GI's were wandering through a West German junkyard searching for VW parts when we ran across a motorcycle. We were able to buy it for 100 D-marks, almost exactly $25.00 at the time. It was a 1952 BSA 250cc, single of course, with a sprung hub rear suspension. It wasn't too terribly hard to get it running, and then the fun began. Although four originally bought it, due to rotations and reassignment, two of us bought the others out and used it to further our educations in the roads of Germany. One of the relevant furtherances was riding a sprung hub bike on wet cobblestones. This is why I have hair-trigger reflexes, my adrenal glands grew to be larger than the kidneys they're perched on, and I'm almost universally called "stupid". But it was the first bike I owned, even if only in part, and I wouldn't be alive if the thing had any more than about it's 10 horsepower. There are base rumors that say that I said I loved it once back when, but I'm not sure about that at all.

After I returned to the land of the big PX, I thought I'd buy a bike for myself with my mustering out pay & picked a Hodaka Ace 100. Back in those days, you could demand a test ride and I got one, oh and it was quite a ride. The biggest thrill of all was going off the 13 foot tall cliff when, in the heat of the moment, I stepped on the rear brake and instead of activating it, shifted instead. The Beezer was right foot shift & the Hodie had a left foot shift. Look ma, I'm flying! One broken collar bone, GI Bill school days, and marriage later, I once again decided I needed a motorcycle. Therefore, I bought two, a Kawasaki KE125 for the wife, and a Yamaha IT400 for me. Same dealer that had sold the Hodaka's and no test rides this time, I wonder why? There were some minor adventures with those two, a 1975 Triumph Bonneville was added, and the little Kwacker got sold. Bikes came, bikes went, and then I met a man who introduced me to his brother-in-law Dr. David Kieffer. Kieffer was serious about his roadracing, and I had about decided that my body was getting a little too old to be competing on the Rocky Mountain Enduro Circuit anymore. A Yamaha RD400 was acquired with which to learn about lean angles on pavement. Great bike! It wound up with DG heads, DG pipes, the K-Mart coil conversion, and other arcane fiddlings that all two-stroke tuners were forced to learn in those days of ring-ding bikes and exhaust smoke. What it lacked though was a decent top end.

Enter the 1981 Honda CB900F. Another great bike, but improvements could be made you know. Kieffer was now an AMA expert riding the national circuit & had some very interesting contacts. One of whom was Denny Zickrick of Ft. Collins Colorado. Denny had been working for Udo Geitl at HRC building engines for guys like Mike Baldwin, Steve Wise, and some mush-mouthed kid named Spencer. About the same time as Denny's wife presented him with twin boys and an ultimatum, the AMA changed the superbike engines from 1025cc to 750's. Denny went back to Ft. Collins & Udo back-doored a ton of now-useless-to-Honda in-line four hot rod parts to Denny. And my 900F suddenly got to be a lot faster. Then, once again, "things happened". I caught what I thought was a summer cold, and it might have been, but there was also apparently a nasty little virus attached that attacked my eyes. I found that out when entering turn 1 at the old CDR track at Castle Rock Colorado & started seeing double at about a buck-forty. Good thing I had those reflexes and the giant adrenaline glands! Didn't put it flat-side-down, but that was the end of my road-racing career, such as it was. But at least my number was 46, though Rossi was probably about 10 years old at the time.

Fast-forward a coupla decades & I found an ophthalmologist that could make me a set of specs that compensated enough for the eye condition (paralyzed left medial muscle, left eye) that made riding a bike above about 50 mph a real interesting experience. Having the wind twist your helmet to the left harder as you go faster is not, repeat not, fun. But, with the new specs I could ride again! Which meant a call to Kieffer asking him to intercede with his buddy who sold Ducati's. Therefore, I am now riding a Ducati 848EVO with termi's and and a Microtec 197, 'cause I just can't leave 'em stock ya know. My big problem though is that the dealer is so far away. It's in Willow Grove PA and I'm in the wilds of Outer Montana. Ah well, it keeps life interesting. Just like selling your home in town waay too fast which commits you to moving to the hundred year old ranch house before the construction's even half done. What's worse is that I'm very close to some fine twisty roads, but the bike's in storage in town because the somewhat finished garage is crammed full of the household goods from the sold house. One of these days real soon now I'm gonna move some chit that "other people" don't think should be moved & get the bike up here & under lock & key.

So what's new with you guys?

900F