I saw an elderly man yesterday dressed as follows:
White Patent Leather slip-on shoes with gold buckles
Black knee high dress socks
Denim Shorts with waist cinched at his upper chest and leg-bottoms meeting his sock tops at his knees
Lime Green Tropical Shirt
Wrap-around Sunglasses (geezer wrap-arounds not suave dude wrap-arounds)
He was getting into the driver's seat of his Buick (of course) with Florida plates, so I know he is not blind or suffering severe mental impairment
so I was left marveling at what can only be considered his fashion sense,
he had a wife in tow....she appeared to be reasonably attired...can't she tell him he looks ridiculous?
Is there an age I need to look forward to (with dread) that will have me thinking an ensemble such as this guy's is pleasing or worthy of appearing in publicly?
Can't the State of Florida run public service ads to try to prevent these sorts of fashion disasters?
The Laughing Gods have a strange sense of humor
Sounds like an old person from central casting. Maybe it was a hidden camera tv show?
Dood Maybe he escaped from the retirement home and isn't all there. I had some crazy old broad that literally escaped from the loony house and came to my dealership dressed almost exactly like Raggedy Ann. She bought a used junker Boxster off Craigslist and brought it to us to fix. She loved it so much she had to have another, and another, that same day. So now she had three boxsters and was asking everyone in sight if they would drive one of em down to Mexico to pick up her shipment of weed as it would be a great adventure. Apparently she had enough weed to fill all three cars. She was out of her mind. She kept showing up for a week until her "caretaker" finally caught up with her. I will never forget her attire of choice.
Old people in general dress different.
That is a classic outfit.
My grandpa used to wear rockport shoes, polyester pants, long sleeve shirt with a button up sweater vest that looked more like a suit vest with long sleeves then a gay ass Jim Tressel Sweater Vest (sorry Metallimonster ;D)
I am a firm believer in some people dress their entire life how they did during their late teens/early 20's/college years
My cousin is a perfect example. He is an attorney, so he makes plenty of money, but dresses like shit.
He still wears 1980's style Patagonia "baggy" shorts that are wayyyyyyyyyyyyy too short, with an old t-shirt and of course some white canvas shoes (he had to switch to Van's as Sperry stopped making them, but I believe now they are making them again. Whenever he finds them, he buys out the store in his size to keep on hand).
During winter months he wears old school Levi jeans, no belt, and a sweatshirt that looks like it has been to hell and back.
Of course that old man drives a buick..........once you hit 70.........that's the only car you are allowed to buy.
Quote from: RAT900 on August 05, 2010, 02:32:28 AM
I saw an elderly man yesterday dressed as follows:
White Patent Leather slip-on shoes with gold buckles
Black knee high dress socks
Denim Shorts with waist cinched at his upper chest and leg-bottoms meeting his sock tops at his knees
Lime Green Tropical Shirt
Wrap-around Sunglasses (geezer wrap-arounds not suave dude wrap-arounds)
He was getting into the driver's seat of his Buick (of course) with Florida plates, so I know he is not blind or suffering severe mental impairment
so I was left marveling at what can only be considered his fashion sense,
he had a wife in tow....she appeared to be reasonably attired...can't she tell him he looks ridiculous?
Is there an age I need to look forward to (with dread) that will have me thinking an ensemble such as this guy's is pleasing or worthy of appearing in publicly?
Can't the State of Florida run public service ads to try to prevent these sorts of fashion disasters?
The Laughing Gods have a strange sense of humor
PIMP!
I think there are people that always have an alternative sense of style. He's probably been dressing that way all his life and his wife has probably learned (like you do with a kid), it just isn't worth making a scene about and combine that with this:
QuoteI am a firm believer in some people dress their entire life how they did during their late teens/early 20's/college years
At least it provides hours of entertainment
I just can't figure it out.
My cousin dresses straight out of the 80's!!!!
I realize being trendy is not on everyones list........but at least a little bit should.
By the way..........he wears penny loafers to work.....with a penny in them.
Don't be a hater! I have penny loafers and wear them often. I also have saddle shoes. 2 pair, red and blue and pink and green.
^
Please don't tell me you wear socks with sandals?
Quote from: cyrus buelton on August 05, 2010, 05:23:34 AM
^
Please don't tell me you wear socks with sandals?
They only do that in Ohio [roll]
Quote from: Porsche Monkey on August 05, 2010, 05:25:13 AM
They only do that in Ohio [roll]
I've actually seen it in every US State I've visited as well as in Costa Rica a few weeks ago.
oh yeah.....seen it in France too, but what do you expect?
Quote from: cyrus buelton on August 05, 2010, 05:27:18 AM
I've actually seen it in every US State I've visited as well as in Costa Rica a few weeks ago.
oh yeah.....seen it in France too, but what do you expect?
those were german tourists
Quote from: cyrus buelton on August 05, 2010, 05:23:34 AM
^
Please don't tell me you wear socks with sandals?
No, that would be tacky!
Why do old men pull their pants up to the nipple line?
All Buicks come equiped from the factory with handicap plates. [thumbsup]
Quote from: Little Monkey Toes on August 05, 2010, 05:33:34 AM
No, that would be tacky!
Why do old men pull their pants up to the nipple line?
Its not just the old men.
Quote from: fastwin on August 05, 2010, 05:41:26 AM
All Buicks come equiped from the factory with handicap plates. [thumbsup]
[thumbsup]
I think we are missing the bigger issue here. We have Rat, the standard bearer of eloquence here on the DMF who, with the turn of a phrase, can eviscerate the absurdities and inequities in our society. With only a razor sharp wit he can reduce grown men to silence and tears. With wisdom he can cut to the heart of an argument and dismiss the well worn talking points of the plebeians and sheeple.
And now he is playing fashion police? For shame. And picking on such low hanging fruit as an elderly Floridian. Its like Shaq blocking the shot of a mentally handicapped third grader and then yelling, "In your face TARD!" Its just unnecessary and excessive. Elderly Floridians dress funny. Well knock me over with a feather.
I wonder if we have just witnessed the beginning of Rat's decline. Perhaps his analytical cynicism is giving way to mere grumpiness as the effort "to see things as they actually are" becomes too great. Next up he will be complaining about airline food, long lines and kids these days. The cold and unavailability of a bathroom will be come the day's most pressing issues. In the end he will have only and aluminum lawn chair and a porch. "Get offa' my lawn!" he will yell tritely at the whipper snappers passing by. And the passersby will only shrug at the deranged old man waving his cane, unknowing of the mental prowess he possessed just a few short years ago. When out of ear shot they will ridicule his plaid shorts exposing the knobby knees perched atop black socks cranked all the way up as though no one was looking.
But the decline has just started. Perhaps there is time to get him the help he needs. Who's with me? Should we have a DMF fund raiser for the mental health care of Rat900? I think we owe it to the guy.
;D
sac
You have beaten me down to a level of depression never before felt. I have no hope left... what's the point anymore? The end is near... ;)
Quote from: cyrus buelton on August 05, 2010, 03:59:49 AM
During winter months he wears old school Levi jeans, no belt, and a sweatshirt that looks like it has been to hell and back.
Oh, shit.
I'm a geezer too.
Quote from: Speedbag on August 05, 2010, 08:18:12 AM
Oh, shit.
I'm a geezer too.
Nah, didn't call him a geezer (he is 46) just that his mode of dressing is stuck in 1983
Quote from: Little Monkey Toes on August 05, 2010, 05:33:34 AM
Why do old men pull their pants up to the nipple line?
It's to give extra support to their old man ball sack! [laugh]
Quote from: Little Monkey Toes on August 05, 2010, 05:33:34 AM
Why do old men pull their pants up to the nipple line?
I work with women that aren't old that do that........I haven't figured it out.
Also, why do some women wear bright colored underwear when they have on white, nearly see through pants?
Quote from: Little Monkey Toes on August 05, 2010, 05:33:34 AM
No, that would be tacky!
Why do old men pull their pants up to the nipple line?
When your waist measures larger than your hips you go up one level so your pants don't fall down :P
Saddle shoes and penny loafers are cool. Yes, I own a pair of penny loafers ;D
This reminds me of a story, and it might be urban legend, about an elderly man that went to the doctor for a checkup, and ended up being diagnosed for being orange. Bright orange.
It went something like this: man appears in a doctor's waiting room, looking like he stepped off the surface of the sun or a steamer basket. Man is interviewed. It is determined that to improve his eyesight, he was happily eating all the carrots his wife would feed him. When the wife was asked if she noticed anything strange, like, I dunno, a certain bright orangeness about him. No, she said. And she had been feeding him bushels of carrots a day for years to no apparent negative effect.
I heard this story back in health class in school - the moral at the time was something like, "too much of a good thing" or "gradual processes are nearly imperceptible" or "don't eat so many goddamn carrots that you turn orange." But now, it is a parable about old age.
I don't think any old people wake up one day and think today I will hike my pants up so high I can't feel my balls. It is a gradual process, one that can result in orangeness, or knowing what your waist band tastes like. I doubt too that in any point in a geezer's life up to that point, did he rock a version of that outfit. In short, it is not a gradual process of selection -black socks, sandals- but a gradual loss of self-awareness.
The key to staying young is making fun of old people. All the time. If you weren't so old, you would know this, Methuselah.
My grandfather would dress in all white pretty regularly. He would wear the full on white patent shoes and white silk suit with the white shirt and tie. Topped off woth patent white belt with gold accents to match his gold tie clip. His favourite attire was a caribbean tux (the one with the white jacket). He would often get confused for a waiter :)
Quote from: cyrus buelton on August 05, 2010, 09:07:32 AM
Also, why do some women wear bright colored underwear when they have on white, nearly see through pants?
they want you to look and comment.
go ahead, try it. they love that.
I don't know, I think this dude may have made a conscious choice. Maybe he was a playa' back in his day. Maybe he resents the retiree life of buffets and golf carts he is subjected to now. Maybe he does it specifically to annoy his wife. Maybe he was on his way to visit his old frat brothers who are just going to die laughing when the see him. Maybe he thinks,
"make the beast with two backs it, I'm old and there ain't a god damn soul I have to answer to any more. So I'm just gonna rock this being old and getting to dress goofy as I can. Why? Because make the beast with two backs you that's why!"
I wanna hear the stories this guy has to tell. There's got to be more to it than just bad fashion sense. I bet he's been a make the beast with two backsin' nutter his whole life and has some scars to prove it. I think we tend to forget that old people had young and wild days. That they are all humorless, bitter old sods who look down society as morally corrupt. That is a stereotype. Somebody was banging the football team in 1952. Maybe it was that sweet little old lady down the block. That elderly gentleman in the tweed jacket in front of you in the supermarket check out line? He got herpes from a Thai hooker. His best friend totaled six motorcycles, has seven illegitimate kids and still goes to prostitutes. I'm just saying that grandma hasn't been baking cookies all of her life and grandpa didn't wait for his true love to come along before he got some stinky on his hang down. I'd bet a dollar to a donut this guy's wardrobe is a make the beast with two backs you to the world. He knows that dressing in the punk costume of ripped jeans and leather jacket would be even sadder on an old man than it is on the teenie punk drones. So what the hell do you do if you are 80 and wanna thumb your nose at the world? You take the old man clothes and you crank them up to 11 that's what you do!
I approve! [thumbsup]
sac
50 cent-pimp (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lmQPNHmXQQ0#normal)
Quote from: ducatiz on August 05, 2010, 11:07:29 AM
they want you to look and comment.
go ahead, try it. they love that.
Um, I thought it was universally understood that white pants/shorts meant "I'm not on period and therefore I'm available for sex." No woman leaves the house unaware that you can see her underwear. So wearing bright colors under white pants is basically stating the above but with a bright neon sign.
sac
Quote from: ducatiz on August 05, 2010, 11:07:29 AM
they want you to look and comment.
go ahead, try it. they love that.
I was too busy falling over laughing with my brother and our wives.
She could have at least worn a thong or gone commando
Quote from: SacDuc on August 05, 2010, 11:12:57 AM
Um, I thought it was universally understood that white pants/shorts meant "I'm not on period and therefore I'm available for sex." No woman leaves the house unaware that you can see her underwear. So wearing bright colors under white pants is basically stating the above but with a bright neon sign.
sac
said women were all with husbands (I ring checked)
These were granny panties..........nothing sexy about them.
Quote from: cyrus buelton on August 05, 2010, 11:22:42 AM
said women were all with husbands (I ring checked)
These were granny panties..........nothing sexy about them.
So? My statement still stands.
sac
Quote from: SacDuc on August 05, 2010, 11:25:29 AM
So? My statement still stands.
sac
I am going to have to disagree.
I would think granny panties would be worn during the menstruation time of month.
Quote from: SacDuc on August 05, 2010, 11:09:22 AM
I'm just saying that grandma hasn't been baking cookies all of her life and grandpa didn't wait for his true love to come along before he got some stinky on his hang down.
[laugh] [laugh] [laugh] [laugh] [laugh][laugh]
Quote from: cyrus buelton on August 05, 2010, 11:22:42 AM
These were granny panties..........nothing sexy about them.
you REALLY have no sense of adventure
Quote from: ducatiz on August 05, 2010, 03:44:56 PM
you REALLY have no sense of adventure
I actually do........but granny panties?
come on dude.
Quote from: cyrus buelton on August 05, 2010, 06:09:14 PM
I actually do........but granny panties?
come on dude.
You know those come off, right?
Quote from: cyrus buelton on August 05, 2010, 06:09:14 PM
I actually do........but granny panties?
come on dude.
Which thread was it where you said you don't eat out? Too adventurous for ya?
Quote from: MrIncredible on August 05, 2010, 06:14:55 PM
You know those come off, right?
peel right off. mmmm
and some even have little velcro tabs at the top. easy peasy. don't even have to lift a leg or walker.
Quote from: MrIncredible on August 05, 2010, 06:14:55 PM
You know those come off, right?
Nope, I didn't know that. I thought they were a chastity belt
Quote from: Porsche Monkey on August 05, 2010, 06:19:26 PM
Which thread was it where you said you don't eat out? Too adventurous for ya?
I didn't say I don't eat out, I am just selective on where I eat at.
Quote from: SacDuc on August 05, 2010, 06:51:25 AM
I think we are missing the bigger issue here.
I wonder if we have just witnessed the beginning of Rat's decline. Perhaps his analytical cynicism is giving way to mere grumpiness as the effort "to see things as they actually are" becomes too great. Next up he will be complaining about airline food, long lines and kids these days. The cold and unavailability of a bathroom will be come the day's most pressing issues. In the end he will have only and aluminum lawn chair and a porch. "Get offa' my lawn!" he will yell tritely at the whipper snappers passing by. And the passersby will only shrug at the deranged old man waving his cane, unknowing of the mental prowess he possessed just a few short years ago. When out of ear shot they will ridicule his plaid shorts exposing the knobby knees perched atop black socks cranked all the way up as though no one was looking.
sac
Damn you Sac...
yes I fear the decline...my focus often shifts to the more egregious examples of signs of the aging process...
I dread the idea of waking up someday and deciding that those gold-toe knee highs might be just the right thing to go with my armpit-high cargo shorts and that I really need a pair of white patent leather shoes and matching belt
my good-natured and candid son once described me (to my face) as "
still somewhat manly and rugged but with just the slightest hint of enfeebled-ness encroaching" ...devastating,
to which I could only reply "I changed your diapers son, someday you'll be changing mine"
Sadly I fear there is no fund for this grim reality that greets all of us at some genetically determined drop-off point...
I am totally ok with the dying thing we all face...hell can't be much worse than that first day of school we all endured as kids
I just don't want to become a warning beacon to younger people about how pathetically ugly the final approach to the landing strip can get
sac,
Rat is smarter then you will ever be.
Love,
JudddDDDDD
I believe by virtue of years spent on this rock , RAT may be the wiser ...........but SAC has the corner on clever and wit.
Dolph :)
What age would define a " Geezer ? "
Dolph :)
Quote from: RAT900 on August 05, 2010, 02:32:28 AM
Lime Green Tropical Shirt
Sounds like he'd get along with this dude I snagged a photo of on Wall Street.
(http://www.freaksofwallst.tspcreations.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/09/IMG00005-300x225.jpg)
Quote from: DoubleEagle on August 06, 2010, 08:03:38 PM
What age would define a " Geezer ? "
Dolph :)
Anything over forty ;)
Quote from: DoubleEagle on August 06, 2010, 07:49:40 PM
I believe by virtue of years spent on this rock , RAT may be the wiser ...........but SAC has the corner on clever and wit.
Dolph :)
plus 1
No one makes me laugh harder or choke more coffee onto the keyboard than Sac, at 34 years of age he is hitting his stride and can write excellent razor-sharp manic material...he does have the gift
I am not that fast anymore and it would be graceless to attempt to be at age 59....
so I settle for "wisdom" which is little more than the refuge of people who can no longer turn in the fastest lap times
but we have our place in things...we have lived long enough to realize how incredibly stupid and lucky we were
and can offer experience to the deaf ears of those who rush past us ;D
Quote from: MrIncredible on August 06, 2010, 08:20:34 PM
Anything over forty ;)
You ought to be getting close !
Dolph :)
Quote from: DoubleEagle on August 06, 2010, 08:23:33 PM
You ought to be getting close !
Dolph :)
Nowhere near it.
Quote from: NoisyDante on August 06, 2010, 08:17:33 PM
Sounds like he'd get along with this dude I snagged a photo of on Wall Street.
(http://www.freaksofwallst.tspcreations.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/09/IMG00005-300x225.jpg)
[clap] [clap] [clap]
Wall and Broad...years ago there used to be a guy we called The Reverend Willy...he would park his beat-up old station wagon right around the corner where Broad becomes Nassau
He would get on the roof of his car with a fly-casting pole and preach our awaiting damnation to us at lunch time...all full of fire, brimstone,
if a girl passing by was pretty he would let her have it, both barrels as a fornicating harlot, bedding with the Devil's spawn on Wall Street...on and on about the money-changers in the Temple etc etc....we used to heckle him and he would attempt to use his fishing pole to lash out at us...
He was great fun
Your lime green man looks to be almost in front of George Washington...we got busted one night attempting to epoxy a basketball to the downturned palm of his outstretched hand
we were chased away by NYPD ....in this day and age we probably would have been in cuffs sobering up in the Tombs awaiting terrorism charges
Quote from: howie on August 07, 2010, 02:10:44 AM
>:(
don't worry Howie, such comments ensure that he will be cursed to age faster than normal
Quote from: lethe on August 07, 2010, 02:43:45 AM
don't worry Howie, such comments ensure that he will be cursed to age faster than normal
;D
Quote from: cyrus buelton on August 06, 2010, 07:12:46 PM
sac,
Rat is smarter then you will ever be.
Love,
JudddDDDDD
My you have a strict command of the obvious. Tell me more.
Sac
Quote from: howie on August 07, 2010, 04:46:11 AM
;D
And MrI still looks older than his soon-to-be geezer wife. ;)
Traders Joes today in Scottsdale..old man wearing Ed Hardy shirt with cargo pants and cowboy boots.
I don't know what's worse Rat? Your example or that?! ^^ ???
I'd say in Arizona, New Mex., Tex., & Okla., Cowboy Boots are apprapo w, any outfit.
Dolph :)