This is a charming book of German children's tales my grandmother used to read to us as little kids
She had an old copy of this in German and would translate and probably embellish
I think my cousins and I burned it when we stumbled across it when cleaning out her house after she shit the bed
The make the beast with two backsing story of Little Suck-a-Thumb would give you night terrors
link below:
http://www.fln.vcu.edu/struwwel/daumen_e.html (http://www.fln.vcu.edu/struwwel/daumen_e.html)
Here's the link to the main page...check out Pauline and the matches...the poor girl immolates herself
http://www.fln.vcu.edu/struwwel/struwwel.html (http://www.fln.vcu.edu/struwwel/struwwel.html)
Egads man! Fairy Tales and old children songs were creepy.
Three blind mice, three blind mice,
See how they run, see how they run,
They all ran after the farmers wife,
She cut off their tails with a carving knife,
Did you ever see such a sight in your life,
As three blind mice.
And then there is that whole ring around the rosy thing. Creepy. But I suppose there's no time soon enough for a child to start contemplating physical violence and their own mortality.
sac
Rock a bye baby, in the tree top
when the wind blows, the cradle will rock
when the bough breaks, the cradle will fall
and down will come baby, cradle and all.
Even as a kid that rhyme seemed twisted to me.
Who the hell puts a baby in a cradle and hangs them in a tree?
<laughing> no shit!!
this was "GA Children" rated stuff compared to what Grandpa would tell us
he had a lump on his forehead...Grandma always made him tell us it was from a baseball bat as a kid....well not quite...even as kids we knew something didn't add up in that explanation so one day when Grandma was out shopping we asked him again how he got the bump on his head...we were like 7-9 years old my 2 cousins and my 2 brothers
Grandpa had us all gather and sit on the floor in front of his rocking chair...if Norman Rockwell was there he would have been inspired to do one of his paintings of a great American Tradition of generations handing down wisdom and lore
Well it was sort of a handing down of wisdom and lore...the gist of which was "singe a Tijuana whore's pussy and her pimps will kick your ass"
Grandpa...(not known for his kid filters) told us the real story since Grandma was out of the way...
he and a bunch of Navy buddies were on shore leave in San Diego back just before WW1...they wound up in Tijuana in a Cantina/Bordello getting shit-faced....now one of the entertainments was as follows,,,if you put a coin on the corner of the table a whore would come over hike up her skirt and gobble it up with her "snatch" (which may very well be why/where that term for female genitalia originated)
well they got bored and didn't believe they were getting their money's worth...so they (probably Grandpa) decided it might be fun to see what happened if they heated the coin up over the candle on the table and then put it on the corner...so they did just that over struts the whore, hikes her skirts, big smile, lays her pudenda down on the coin.....well the ensuing howl emanating from the whore was like an air raid siren alerting every pimp within earshot that a money-maker was down...
Grandpa and buddies fought their way back to the border joined in and supported by other sailors on leave down there...but Grandpa did catch a blackjack in the forehead for his efforts before they got away
so yes it was lore and wisdom being handed down...sex-ed, misogyny for entertainment, drunkenness and fighting were fun...needless to say we were always awestruck after hanging out with Grandpa
Quote from: RAT900 on August 13, 2010, 01:48:58 PM
<laughing> no shit!!
this was "GA Children" rated stuff compared to what Grandpa would tell us
he had a lump on his forehead...Grandma always made him tell us it was from a baseball bat as a kid....well not quite...even as kids we knew something didn't add up in that explanation so one day when Grandma was out shopping we asked him again how he got the bump on his head...we were like 7-9 years old my 2 cousins and my 2 brothers
Grandpa had us all gather and sit on the floor in front of his rocking chair...if Norman Rockwell was there he would have been inspired to do one of his paintings of a great American Tradition of generations handing down wisdom and lore
Well it was sort of a handing down of wisdom and lore...the gist of which was "singe a Tijuana whore's pussy and her pimps will kick your ass"
Grandpa...(not known for his kid filters) told us the real story since Grandma was out of the way...
he and a bunch of Navy buddies were on shore leave in San Diego back just before WW1...they wound up in Tijuana in a Cantina/Bordello getting shit-faced....now one of the entertainments was as follows,,,if you put a coin on the corner of the table a whore would come over hike up her skirt and gobble it up with her "snatch" (which may very well be why/where that term for female genitalia originated)
well they got bored and didn't believe they were getting their money's worth...so they (probably Grandpa) decided it might be fun to see what happened if they heated the coin up over the candle on the table and then put it on the corner...so they did just that over struts the whore, hikes her skirts, big smile, lays her pudenda down on the coin.....well the ensuing howl emanating from the whore was like an air raid siren alerting every pimp within earshot that a money-maker was down...
Grandpa and buddies fought their way back to the border joined in and supported by other sailors on leave down there...but Grandpa did catch a blackjack in the forehead for his efforts before they got away
so yes it was lore and wisdom being handed down...sex-ed, misogyny for entertainment, drunkenness and fighting were fun...needless to say we were always awestruck after hanging out with Grandpa
You had me rolling on the floor for about 2 minutes with this one.
Trip to Tijuana; $5 (WWI remember)
Hot coin; $0.25
Blackjack to the forehead; priceless
Wasn't there a Donkey evolved as well ?
Dolph :)
Quote from: DoubleEagle on August 13, 2010, 06:15:57 PM
Wasn't there a Donkey evolved as well ?
Dolph :)
No donkey stories from Gramps....but much weirder creepier shit he and his fellow sailors discovered about the Chinese peasants when they were at port in the far east in the early 1900's
(http://i288.photobucket.com/albums/ll161/porschaholic/smileys/munchstretchcouch2-1.gif)
Quote from: RAT900 on August 14, 2010, 12:12:37 AM
No donkey stories from Gramps....but much weirder creepier shit he and his fellow sailors discovered about the Chinese peasants when they were at port in the far east in the early 1900's
Do tell. :)
If they all chipped in enough money they could get the right (?) person at port in China to produce another Chinaman willing to blow his brains out with a revolver in front of them for their amusement...
the premise was that if enough money was gathered for the man that well exceeded his potential earnings for his lifetime he would give the money to his family and check himself out in front of them...different value systems I suppose than what the sailors were accustomed to
Gramps was kind of like the guy with the puzzle-box in the opening scenes of the original Hellraiser
Quote from: RAT900 on August 14, 2010, 09:11:26 AM
If they all chipped in enough money they could get the right (?) person at port in China to produce another Chinaman willing to blow his brains out with a revolver in front of them for their amusement...
<snip>
That was amusing?
Is it still?
Quote from: ducpainter on August 14, 2010, 10:58:40 AM
That was amusing?
Is it still?
humans, being what humans are, the answer is an emphatic "Yes" in many circles
consider the draw of a public execution in the Old West or England or France for centuries
or more recently the cheers and roars of the capacity crowds at the Afghani Soccer Stadium as "adulterous" women were stoned to death under Taliban Rule
or the crowds I witnessed gathering in the sooks of Saudi Arabia as a child in the 1950's to watch a "criminal" get his back cane-whipped to tatters or a hand lopped off
make no mistake we are not in Disneyland...we just like to pretend we are
Quote from: RAT900 on August 14, 2010, 11:26:10 AM
make no mistake we are not in Disneyland...we just like to pretend we are
You mean the cute fury little animals don't love each other? :D
Quote from: kopfjäger on August 14, 2010, 11:41:33 AM
You mean the cute fury little animals don't love each other? :D
no, remember the sow pig will devour her own young if conditions don't meet her standards...this ain't Charlotte's Web
Quote from: RAT900 on August 14, 2010, 11:26:10 AM
humans, being what humans are, the answer is an emphatic "Yes" in many circles
consider the draw of a public execution in the Old West or England or France for centuries
or more recently the cheers and roars of the capacity crowds at the Afghani Soccer Stadium as "adulterous" women were stoned to death under Taliban Rule
or the crowds I witnessed gathering in the sooks of Saudi Arabia as a child in the 1950's to watch a "criminal" get his back cane-whipped to tatters or a hand lopped off
make no mistake we are not in Disneyland...we just like to pretend we are
But we're talking about death just for the make the beast with two backs of it in the example with your grandfather.
All the other examples are punitive legally or religious...and we know how religion loves a scapegoat.
I realize we're not in Kansas anymore, but is that the circle you run in?
Quote from: ducpainter on August 14, 2010, 12:15:13 PM
But we're talking about death just for the make the beast with two backs of it in the example with your grandfather.
All the other examples are punitive legally or religious...and we know how religion loves a scapegoat.
I realize we're not in Kansas anymore, but is that the circle you run in?
hardly and I do not believe I characterized anywhere my belief that this was anything less than "weirder" and "creepier"....
these were people who grew up understanding the value of a Chinaman's life was nil if they expected a paycheck on payday working for the railroad...or their longevity could be measured in hours if they struck gold mining a claim up in the Tehama's or Sierra's...hence the old saying "he didn't have a Chinaman's chance" and so forth
I barely survived my family of origin, I hardly benefitted from it, and they are in fact a long run of pretty evil violent people
Gramps beat a man to death with his bare hands which is why he was in the Navy to begin with...face manslaughter charges or sign up
Gramps father was shot to death outside a saloon in Whiskytown Ca. trying to kill his 22 year-old wife's ex-husband with a pick axe...at age 57 no less
Gramp's maternal grandfather then raised him...taught him how to salt dry-hole gold mines with gold dust packed into muzzleloaders to con eastern investors
he (great-gramps) also had a history of killing folks down in Healdsburg Ca. and was shot in the face by his nephew-in-law and carried the bullet in his skull for life
those are only several of the highlights
Quote from: RAT900 on August 14, 2010, 12:37:40 PM
hardly and I do not believe I characterized anywhere my belief that this was anything less than "weirder" and "creepier"....
these were people who grew up understanding the value of a Chinaman's life was nil if they expected a paycheck on payday working for the railroad...or their longevity could be measured in hours if they struck gold mining a claim up in the Tehama's or Sierra's...hence the old saying "he didn't have a Chinaman's chance" and so forth
I barely survived my family of origin, I hardly benefitted from it, and they are in fact a long run of pretty evil violent people
Gramps beat a man to death with his bare hands which is why he was in the Navy to begin with...face manslaughter charges or sign up
Gramps father was shot to death outside a saloon in Whiskytown Ca. trying to kill his 22 year-old wife's ex-husband with a pick axe...at age 57 no less
Gramp's maternal grandfather then raised him...taught him how to salt dry-hole gold mines with gold dust packed into muzzleloaders to con eastern investors
he (great-gramps) also had a history of killing folks down in Healdsburg Ca. and was shot in the face by his nephew-in-law and carried the bullet in his skull for life
those are only several of the highlights
Sounds like family reunions ended with a paddy wagon ride for many.
Quote from: RAT900 on August 14, 2010, 12:37:40 PM
hardly and I do not believe I characterized anywhere my belief that this was anything less than "weirder" and "creepier"....
these were people who grew up understanding the value of a Chinaman's life was nil if they expected a paycheck on payday working for the railroad...or their longevity could be measured in hours if they struck gold mining a claim up in the Tehama's or Sierra's...hence the old saying "he didn't have a Chinaman's chance" and so forth
I barely survived my family of origin, I hardly benefitted from it, and they are in fact a long run of pretty evil violent people
Gramps beat a man to death with his bare hands which is why he was in the Navy to begin with...face manslaughter charges or sign up
Gramps father was shot to death outside a saloon in Whiskytown Ca. trying to kill his 22 year-old wife's ex-husband with a pick axe...at age 57 no less
Gramp's maternal grandfather then raised him...taught him how to salt dry-hole gold mines with gold dust packed into muzzleloaders to con eastern investors
he (great-gramps) also had a history of killing folks down in Healdsburg Ca. and was shot in the face by his nephew-in-law and carried the bullet in his skull for life
those are only several of the highlights
I'm not looking to fight G...
I'm just thinkin' out loud.
My gramps was a bootlegger.
My dad...I could tell you stories. [evil]
I guess I'm a wuss.
I can cut a turkeys throat, or shoot a pig in the head...to feed myself and family.
I just can't go to the side where it's OK to kill people.
XTC - Scissor Man (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FQSVSZJV1AM#normal)
Quote from: ducpainter on August 14, 2010, 02:34:41 PM
I'm not looking to fight G...
I'm just thinkin' out loud.
My gramps was a bootlegger.
My dad...I could tell you stories. [evil]
I guess I'm a wuss.
I can cut a turkeys throat, or shoot a pig in the head...to feed myself and family.
I just can't go to the side where it's OK to kill people.
....it is not a "circle I run in"...it was the family I was born into...not something you get to choose as near as I can tell
I left my father out of this because the results of his existence, worldview and thinking led to some pretty scary soulless children
and among his offspring I was his favorite pet project...his own personal Manchurian Candidate playground because I was the brightest among them
he failed to physically beat and psychologically bully the humanity completely out of me, as a child I buried it where he couldn't find it
and I unearthed it 4 years after he died when I was in my 30's
when I was fairly certain he wasn't going to dig himself back out of his grave and come looking for it again
prior to that emergence I was something he was probably proud of
I understand my family of origin, it is in my DNA, my childhood exposures and it is within my capacities...
but it is not something/someone I have to be or be part of,
nor someone I choose to be....
I will likely never out-distance the shadow that family tree has cast over my existence
but I do get to watch my children walk outside its reach
in the light ;)
"be good or die."
http://www.phobe.com/struw/ (http://www.phobe.com/struw/)
;D good link...so ummm "teutonic" [clap]