Der Struwwelpeter

[RAT900]

This is a charming book of German children's tales my grandmother used to read to us as little kids

She had an old copy of this in German and would translate and probably embellish

I think my cousins and I burned it when we stumbled across it when cleaning out her house after she shit the bed

The make the beast with two backsing story of Little Suck-a-Thumb would give you night terrors

link below:

http://www.fln.vcu.edu/struwwel/daumen_e.html


Here's the link to the main page...check out Pauline and the matches...the poor girl immolates herself

http://www.fln.vcu.edu/struwwel/struwwel.html

[SacDuc]

Egads man! Fairy Tales and old children songs were creepy.

Three blind mice, three blind mice,
See how they run, see how they run,
They all ran after the farmers wife,
She cut off their tails with a carving knife,
Did you ever see such a sight in your life,
As three blind mice.


And then there is that whole ring around the rosy thing. Creepy. But I suppose there's no time soon enough for a child to start contemplating physical violence and their own mortality.

sac

[Betty Rage]

Rock a bye baby, in the tree top
when the wind blows, the cradle will rock
when the bough breaks, the cradle will fall
and down will come baby, cradle and all.

Even as a kid that rhyme seemed twisted to me.

Who the hell puts a baby in a cradle and hangs them in a tree?

[RAT900]

<laughing> no shit!!

this was "GA Children" rated stuff compared to what Grandpa would tell us

he had a lump on his forehead...Grandma always made him tell us it was from a baseball bat as a kid....well not quite...even as kids we knew something didn't add up in that explanation so one day when Grandma was out shopping we asked him again how he got the bump on his head...we were like 7-9 years old my 2 cousins and my 2 brothers

Grandpa had us all gather and sit on the floor in front of his rocking chair...if Norman Rockwell was there he would have been inspired to do one of his paintings of a great American Tradition of generations handing down wisdom and lore

Well it was sort of a handing down of wisdom and lore...the gist of which was "singe a Tijuana whore's pussy and her pimps will kick your ass"

Grandpa...(not known for his kid filters) told us the real story since Grandma was out of the way...

he and a bunch of Navy buddies were on shore leave in San Diego back just before WW1...they wound up in Tijuana in a Cantina/Bordello getting shit-faced....now one of the entertainments was as follows,,,if you put a coin on the corner of the table a whore would come over hike up her skirt and gobble it up with her "snatch" (which may very well be why/where that term for female genitalia originated)

well they got bored and didn't believe they were getting their money's worth...so they (probably Grandpa) decided it might be fun to see what happened if they heated the coin up over the candle on the table and then put it on the corner...so they did just that   over struts the whore, hikes her skirts, big smile, lays her pudenda down on the coin.....well the ensuing howl emanating from the whore was like an air raid siren alerting every pimp within earshot that a money-maker was down...

Grandpa and buddies fought their way back to the border joined in and supported by other sailors on leave down there...but Grandpa did catch a blackjack in the forehead for his efforts before they got away

so yes it was lore and wisdom being handed down...sex-ed, misogyny for entertainment, drunkenness and fighting were fun...needless to say we were always awestruck after hanging out with Grandpa

[Bun-bun]

<laughing> no shit!!

this was "GA Children" rated stuff compared to what Grandpa would tell us

he had a lump on his forehead...Grandma always made him tell us it was from a baseball bat as a kid....well not quite...even as kids we knew something didn't add up in that explanation so one day when Grandma was out shopping we asked him again how he got the bump on his head...we were like 7-9 years old my 2 cousins and my 2 brothers

Grandpa had us all gather and sit on the floor in front of his rocking chair...if Norman Rockwell was there he would have been inspired to do one of his paintings of a great American Tradition of generations handing down wisdom and lore

Well it was sort of a handing down of wisdom and lore...the gist of which was "singe a Tijuana whore's pussy and her pimps will kick your ass"

Grandpa...(not known for his kid filters) told us the real story since Grandma was out of the way...

he and a bunch of Navy buddies were on shore leave in San Diego back just before WW1...they wound up in Tijuana in a Cantina/Bordello getting shit-faced....now one of the entertainments was as follows,,,if you put a coin on the corner of the table a whore would come over hike up her skirt and gobble it up with her "snatch" (which may very well be why/where that term for female genitalia originated)

well they got bored and didn't believe they were getting their money's worth...so they (probably Grandpa) decided it might be fun to see what happened if they heated the coin up over the candle on the table and then put it on the corner...so they did just that   over struts the whore, hikes her skirts, big smile, lays her pudenda down on the coin.....well the ensuing howl emanating from the whore was like an air raid siren alerting every pimp within earshot that a money-maker was down...

Grandpa and buddies fought their way back to the border joined in and supported by other sailors on leave down there...but Grandpa did catch a blackjack in the forehead for his efforts before they got away

so yes it was lore and wisdom being handed down...sex-ed, misogyny for entertainment, drunkenness and fighting were fun...needless to say we were always awestruck after hanging out with Grandpa

You had me rolling on the floor for about 2 minutes with this one.

Trip to Tijuana; $5 (WWI remember)

Hot coin; $0.25

Blackjack to the forehead; priceless

[DoubleEagle]

Wasn't there a Donkey evolved as well ?

Dolph     

[RAT900]

Wasn't there a Donkey evolved as well ?

Dolph     

No donkey stories from Gramps....but much weirder creepier shit he and his fellow sailors discovered about the Chinese peasants when they were at port in the far east in the early 1900's

[Porsche Monkey]

[Speedbag]

No donkey stories from Gramps....but much weirder creepier shit he and his fellow sailors discovered about the Chinese peasants when they were at port in the far east in the early 1900's

Do tell. 

[RAT900]

If they all chipped in enough money they could get the right (?) person at port in China to produce another Chinaman willing to blow his brains out with a revolver in front of them for their amusement...

the premise was that if enough money was gathered for the man that well exceeded his potential earnings for his lifetime he would give the money to his family and check himself out in front of them...different value systems I suppose than what the sailors were accustomed to

Gramps was kind of like the guy with the puzzle-box in the opening scenes of the original Hellraiser

[ducpainter]

If they all chipped in enough money they could get the right (?) person at port in China to produce another Chinaman willing to blow his brains out with a revolver in front of them for their amusement...

<snip>

That was amusing?

Is it still?

[RAT900]

That was amusing?

Is it still?

humans, being what humans are, the answer is an emphatic "Yes" in many circles

consider the draw of a public execution in the Old West or England or France for centuries

or more recently the cheers and roars of the capacity crowds at the Afghani Soccer Stadium as "adulterous" women were stoned to death under Taliban Rule

or the crowds I witnessed gathering in the sooks of Saudi Arabia as a child in the 1950's to watch a "criminal" get his back cane-whipped to tatters or a hand lopped off

make no mistake we are not in Disneyland...we just like to pretend we are

[Kopfjager]

make no mistake we are not in Disneyland...we just like to pretend we are

You mean the cute fury little animals don't love each other? 

[RAT900]

You mean the cute fury little animals don't love each other? 

no, remember the sow pig will devour her own young if conditions don't meet her standards...this ain't Charlotte's Web

[ducpainter]

humans, being what humans are, the answer is an emphatic "Yes" in many circles

consider the draw of a public execution in the Old West or England or France for centuries

or more recently the cheers and roars of the capacity crowds at the Afghani Soccer Stadium as "adulterous" women were stoned to death under Taliban Rule

or the crowds I witnessed gathering in the sooks of Saudi Arabia as a child in the 1950's to watch a "criminal" get his back cane-whipped to tatters or a hand lopped off

make no mistake we are not in Disneyland...we just like to pretend we are

But we're talking about death just for the make the beast with two backs of it in the example with your grandfather.

All the other examples are punitive legally or religious...and we know how religion loves a scapegoat.

I realize we're not in Kansas anymore, but is that the circle you run in?