Ducati Monster Forum

Kitchen Sink => No Moto Content => Topic started by: badgalbetty on January 24, 2011, 06:18:52 AM

Title: can you guess what caused the scratches
Post by: badgalbetty on January 24, 2011, 06:18:52 AM
 and dings in the hood of my 1992 Honda?

Points are awarded for creativity.......

The sillier your comments the more points you get and please ...........don't keep it work safe................... [laugh]
Title: Re: can you guess what caused the scratches
Post by: sbrguy on January 24, 2011, 06:22:56 AM
got to be a cat.
Title: Re: can you guess what caused the scratches
Post by: Jarvicious on January 24, 2011, 06:25:30 AM
You hit a mime, but he was so good you didn't even notice until you saw the scratches.
Title: Re: can you guess what caused the scratches
Post by: badgalbetty on January 24, 2011, 06:29:13 AM
so far Jarvicious has 3 points..... and sbrguy 1
but neither....
Title: Re: can you guess what caused the scratches
Post by: ryandalling on January 24, 2011, 07:07:23 AM
I have a pic of the dust marks and scratches of two people going at it on a Volvo.... amazing what belt buckles and crazy women can do.
Title: Re: can you guess what caused the scratches
Post by: orangelion03 on January 24, 2011, 07:16:35 AM
Quote from: ryandalling on January 24, 2011, 07:07:23 AM
I have a pic of the dust marks and scratches of two people going at it on a Volvo.... amazing what belt buckles and crazy women can do.

Me too!  My ex and I used to live up the street from a nightclub, a couple blocks from the beach.  One sunday morning I went out to get bagels and I noticed very distinct marks on the fender and hood of our 242...ass cheeks and hands.  Good cars Volvos...no dents ;D
Title: Re: can you guess what caused the scratches
Post by: MendoDave on January 24, 2011, 08:13:15 AM
You hit some zombies and they were scratchin to get back up on the hood so as to eat your brains while you were running them over.
Title: Re: can you guess what caused the scratches
Post by: Oldfisti on January 24, 2011, 08:33:16 AM
Classic result of texting while walking.


Fountain lady strikes again  >:(
Title: Re: can you guess what caused the scratches
Post by: akmnstr on January 24, 2011, 09:34:15 AM
Aliens!
Title: Re: can you guess what caused the scratches
Post by: RAT900 on January 24, 2011, 09:37:46 AM
Squirrels with acorns
Title: Re: can you guess what caused the scratches
Post by: Monster Dave on January 24, 2011, 09:47:58 AM
Did you hit Hugh Jackman while he was in full Wolverine mode?
Title: Re: can you guess what caused the scratches
Post by: The Bacon Junkie on January 24, 2011, 10:04:22 AM
You were driving through a hailstorm, then out of nowhere came a tornado!  The tornado had just tore through Nate's yard, picked up a bunch of cats, and as they were flying past your car, they made lots of scratches on your hood while trying to hang on so they wouldn't be blown away?  Maybe his turkey left some scratches too...  :D




[bacon]
Title: Re: can you guess what caused the scratches
Post by: pennyrobber on January 24, 2011, 10:12:52 AM
My guess would be that your car is having an affair with a wild woman that has a French manicure.
Title: Re: can you guess what caused the scratches
Post by: Oldfisti on January 24, 2011, 10:16:09 AM
Quote from: The Bacon Junkie on January 24, 2011, 10:04:22 AM
You were driving through a hailstorm, then out of nowhere came a tornado!  The tornado had just tore through Nate's yard, picked up a bunch of cats, and as they were flying past your car, they made lots of scratches on your hood while trying to hang on so they wouldn't be blown away?  Maybe his turkey left some scratches too...  :D




[bacon]


Sorry Ryan but tornados don't form in sub-zero arctic air.


I only say this because I'm sure Nate wishes it was warm enough for a tornado right about now...
Title: Re: can you guess what caused the scratches
Post by: ryandalling on January 24, 2011, 10:55:09 AM
Quote from: alfisti on January 24, 2011, 10:16:09 AM

Sorry Ryan but tornados don't form in sub-zero arctic air.


I only say this because I'm sure Nate wishes it was warm enough for a tornado right about now...

Dude... haven't you seen any of the end of the world movies... if it happened in a movie... it could totally happen in real life... I could name at least 5 movies with tornados in arctic air scenarios.
Title: Re: can you guess what caused the scratches
Post by: MendoDave on January 24, 2011, 11:08:51 AM
Quote from: The Bacon Junkie on January 24, 2011, 10:04:22 AM
You were driving through a hailstorm, then out of nowhere came a tornado!  The tornado had just tore through Nate's yard, picked up a bunch of cats, and as they were flying past your car, they made lots of scratches on your hood while trying to hang on so they wouldn't be blown away?  Maybe his turkey left some scratches too...  :D




[bacon]

[thumbsup]
Title: Re: can you guess what caused the scratches
Post by: Latinbalar on January 24, 2011, 12:23:28 PM
Some one shot a porn in your office parking lot/garage and while getting the money shot the camera man slipped and fell on the hood of your car?
Title: Re: can you guess what caused the scratches
Post by: Bick on January 24, 2011, 02:05:00 PM
This was the cause...
Meatballs  -  A scary story (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=h73CIif-5n0#normal)
Title: Re: can you guess what caused the scratches
Post by: Goat_Herder on January 24, 2011, 03:34:09 PM
A ninja assassin fell thru the roof and landed on the hood and caused the dent.  All the weaponry landed on the hood and scratched up the paint, as the ninja tried to regain balance and consciousness.
Title: Re: can you guess what caused the scratches
Post by: lethe on January 24, 2011, 05:17:48 PM
You were racing the local punks again and your extreme speed started peeling the paint from your car in strips.
A week more of your deviant behavior and full racing stripes will develop.
Title: Re: can you guess what caused the scratches
Post by: zooom on January 24, 2011, 06:03:45 PM
Guy Fieri was having a Japanese Steakhouse cooking demonstration on the hood of your car and the spatulas caused the scratches and the dents were from the banging of the shakers and various other items....some of these were a bit more excessive as Duff Goldman was there being the comedic relief making Guy laugh harder and Anne Burrell was playing the "straight man" of the three with her spicy commentary....
Title: Re: can you guess what caused the scratches
Post by: du mass on January 24, 2011, 06:10:31 PM
dents from jay cutlers tears and scratches from his purse
Title: Re: can you guess what caused the scratches
Post by: fastwin on January 24, 2011, 06:13:12 PM
Actually tornadoes can form in frigid conditions. ;D

And I'm following the blood trail to Nate's turkey. You know how I have innate (and no, this had nothing to do with Nate! [laugh]) distrust and loathing of turkeys. I'm thinking the rat birds with big tails had something to do with this. Just saying...  [popcorn] [bacon]
Title: Re: can you guess what caused the scratches
Post by: the_Journeyman on January 24, 2011, 06:42:42 PM
Hmmm...  Scratches & dings...

Purely circumstantial, however I do hypothesize a scenario.  It seems you were traveling down a local road taking in the scenery that only a small town can offer.  A bit distracted by the lull of the tires whining on the pavement and the putter of a small engine, you never saw someone step into the edge of the travel lane.  As you snapped back to reality, and made an attempt to dodge the person, you cleared the sandpaper salesman, but managed to hit and split open his briefcase of sandpaper.  In just a thought, the side of your car had sandpaper sliding along it with an eerie "SKKSKSKSKSKSKSK" leaving a rather noticeable set of scratches.  In the panic of regaining control from the near miss and the awful sound of the sandpaper sliding along the car you headed right for another salesman on the sidewalk.  This gentleman, in his haste simply flung his briefcase away and bolted.  As the newly dispatched briefcase flew through the air, the weight of its contents overwhelmed the latches and it burst open.  In an armageddon-like shower from an angry got of metallurgy, ball bearings rained down upon your already battle-scared conveyance.  When all came to rest, all were well.  The worst for wear of the scenario were two, empty-handed and out of breath salesmen, one for sandpaper and one for ball bearings along with a sad car with a newly assaulted fender.

JM
Title: Re: can you guess what caused the scratches
Post by: badgalbetty on January 24, 2011, 08:28:57 PM
Journeyman........damn! You win!  [bow_down] 2 billion points! [beer]
That is exactly what happened!

Actually a goat decided to jump onto my car and perfrom the Riverdance....3 times with a matinee performance at 1.05 in the afternoon.
Title: Re: can you guess what caused the scratches
Post by: Jarvicious on January 25, 2011, 08:57:16 AM
Actually, that was my second guess.  Was Justin Timberlake playing, because that was what caused my last bout of hood scratching.  Well, that and a fifth of Zubrowka  [drink]
Title: Re: can you guess what caused the scratches
Post by: zooom on January 25, 2011, 09:13:54 AM
and my other guess was that the travelocity gnome was holding a Zumba class on your hood and got confused and started breakdancing because he had the wrong shoes on and they scratched and scuffed the hell outta the hood in the process when he was playing off his "oops" moment of realization....
Title: Re: can you guess what caused the scratches
Post by: redxblack on January 27, 2011, 09:17:24 AM
I figured a timberwolf in heat escaped from the local zoo and was hiding on the roof of your car while local stray dogs attempted to hit some wild strange. I know that's how at least two of my cars got damaged. I no longer live near the zoo.