Ducati Monster Forum

Kitchen Sink => No Moto Content => Topic started by: silentbob on July 07, 2008, 11:48:53 PM

Title: HELP! Chimps ate my nose and my testicles (Warning Graphic)
Post by: silentbob on July 07, 2008, 11:48:53 PM
(http://media.bonnint.net/apimage/c0f8f672-0f34-4f12-8f6a-1edad3abb5f3.jpg)

http://www.wtop.com/?nid=104&sid=1431855 (http://www.wtop.com/?nid=104&sid=1431855)
Title: Re: HELP! Chimps ate my nose and my testicles
Post by: Drunken Monkey on July 08, 2008, 12:06:50 AM
"You mess with the Monkey, you get the OH MY SWEET JESUS! THE HORROR! THE HORROR!"

Uhm.


That's... uhm.


Nasty.


Title: Re: HELP! Chimps ate my nose and my testicles
Post by: Big Troubled Bear on July 08, 2008, 12:13:52 AM
When will they learn to leave the monkey`s in africa [roll]
Title: Re: HELP! Chimps ate my nose and my testicles
Post by: ROBsS4R on July 08, 2008, 12:49:37 AM
QuoteOver the Davises' protests, Moe was taken to an animal sanctuary. But in 2005, when they took a cake to celebrate Moe's birthday with him, the couple was viciously attacked by two other chimpanzees who had escaped their cages.

The chimps nearly killed St. James Davis, chewing off his nose, testicles and foot and biting off chunks of his buttocks and legs, before the sanctuary owner shot the animals to death.

Wait a minute. This happened in 2005 and they still love chimps and are taking care of other ones... WTF  ???

They look heart broken that Moe missing... What about his missing Testicles and Nose. OMG what is wrong with people  :-\
Title: Re: HELP! Chimps ate my nose and my testicles (Warning Graphic)
Post by: Drunken Monkey on July 08, 2008, 12:51:47 AM
<mod hat>

Added a warning. As this really is pretty nasty

</mod hat>
Title: Re: HELP! Chimps ate my nose and my testicles (Warning Graphic)
Post by: NAKID on July 08, 2008, 12:59:34 AM
Well, it's really nothing more than you'd see if you saw him walking down the street...  ???

Title: Re: HELP! Chimps ate my nose and my testicles (Warning Graphic)
Post by: 55Spy on July 08, 2008, 02:22:18 AM

MOE, MOE here boy.  anybody have lunch with a monkey?  he uses a knife and...wait..... no I said he uses a knife not that he has one now...

Tough to get little kids to help you look for a monkey if you look that way I bet.
Title: Re: HELP! Chimps ate my nose and my testicles (Warning Graphic)
Post by: Dana on July 08, 2008, 04:58:14 AM
"He meant the world to us," said St. James Davis. "He was the best man at my wedding."

Ummm...May the best man...err.umm...best "chimp" bring the rings forward...

Gonna be hard as hell to find Moe if he's anything like Lancelot Link, Secret Chimp! 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dlNTKf2yy34


Dana

Title: Re: HELP! Chimps ate my nose and my testicles (Warning Graphic)
Post by: SheMonster on July 08, 2008, 05:44:41 AM
See what happens when you mess with the trunk monkey?!
Title: Re: HELP! Chimps ate my nose and my testicles (Warning Graphic)
Post by: Scooter Montgomery on July 08, 2008, 06:24:03 AM
Maybe it was Bubbles the monkey trying to steal a new nose for Michael Jackson.

Seriously though they taught him how to eat with a knife and fork wtf. He is properly out looking for a sword, for the monkey fights.
Title: Re: HELP! Chimps ate my nose and my testicles (Warning Graphic)
Post by: junior varsity on July 08, 2008, 06:37:54 AM
wtf. wtf. wtf.

next monkey i see, i'm punching in the nose.
Title: Re: HELP! Chimps ate my nose and my testicles (Warning Graphic)
Post by: jswledhed on July 08, 2008, 06:48:34 AM
Quote from: SheMonster on July 08, 2008, 05:44:41 AM
See what happens when you mess with the trunk monkey?!

[laugh]
Title: Re: HELP! Chimps ate my nose and my testicles (Warning Graphic)
Post by: Grampa on July 08, 2008, 07:40:07 AM
hey Moe, hey Moe,....... nyuk nyuk nyuk

Ya suppose that guy snores?
Title: Re: HELP! Chimps ate my nose and my testicles (Warning Graphic)
Post by: zarn02 on July 08, 2008, 08:06:20 AM
holy make the beast with two backsing tits!
Title: Re: HELP! Chimps ate my nose and my testicles (Warning Graphic)
Post by: Mother on July 08, 2008, 08:08:37 AM
Quote from: bobspapa on July 08, 2008, 07:40:07 AM
hey Moe, hey Moe,....... nyuk nyuk nyuk

Ya suppose that guy snores?

not any more
Title: Re: HELP! Chimps ate my nose and my testicles (Warning Graphic)
Post by: junior varsity on July 08, 2008, 08:15:23 AM
how does one blow their nose now?
Title: Re: HELP! Chimps ate my nose and my testicles (Warning Graphic)
Post by: Grio on July 08, 2008, 08:19:17 AM
There is a lot of that guy missing...jeez.
Funny this should surface.  I actually looked for a follow up story after the original chimp attack.
Title: Re: HELP! Chimps ate my nose and my testicles (Warning Graphic)
Post by: junior varsity on July 08, 2008, 08:20:28 AM
let me get this right:

you were sitting at the computer one day, and thought, "hey, remember that guy who got his balls forcibly removed by a chimpanzee? wonder how he's doing....."
Title: Re: HELP! Chimps ate my nose and my testicles (Warning Graphic)
Post by: Grampa on July 08, 2008, 09:26:00 AM
the monkey has matches


burn monkey burn

(http://majorlycool.com/media/1/snow-monkeys/snow-monkey-by-fire.jpg)
Title: Re: HELP! Chimps ate my nose and my testicles (Warning Graphic)
Post by: Grio on July 08, 2008, 10:01:51 AM
Quote from: ato memphis on July 08, 2008, 08:20:28 AM
let me get this right:

you were sitting at the computer one day, and thought, "hey, remember that guy who got his balls forcibly removed by a chimpanzee? wonder how he's doing....."

Something like that...I was wondering if he survived and all that.  Some stories have their own power.  The media milks as much as they can out of them, and then the story dissapears...no follow up.

Like the woman who had been kept in the basement with her children fathered by her dad.
How is she doing?  I can understand privacy and all, but...
Title: Re: HELP! Chimps ate my nose and my testicles (Warning Graphic)
Post by: factorPlayer on July 08, 2008, 11:58:08 AM
Yeah that one raises a lot of questions...  like how did the chimps get at his make the beast with two backsin' gnads?  You'd assume he was wearing normal clothing or something - did they rip off his pants or just bite right through them? 

There was an incident where a university cop shot an escaped chimp around here not long ago...
http://www.dallasnews.com/sharedcontent/dws/news/texassouthwest/stories/DN-chimp_06tex.ART.State.Edition1.462cd7f.html

at first I thought he was some asshole cop but now I kinda don't blame him.  Wonder if he was thinking about this incident when the chimp came at him. 
Title: Re: HELP! Chimps ate my nose and my testicles (Warning Graphic)
Post by: Grampa on July 08, 2008, 12:09:16 PM
(http://lonestartimes.com/images/2006/12/love_monkey_x.jpg)
Title: Re: HELP! Chimps ate my nose and my testicles (Warning Graphic)
Post by: NuTTs on July 08, 2008, 02:38:35 PM
I wouldn't want to mess with this chimp

(http://waterstone.files.wordpress.com/2007/09/chainsaw-chimp.jpg)

And a nice video to boot..

http://www.metacafe.com/watch/50525/evil_chimps/
Title: Re: HELP! Chimps ate my nose and my testicles (Warning Graphic)
Post by: ducsix on July 08, 2008, 02:49:25 PM
Quote from: Dana on July 08, 2008, 04:58:14 AM
Lancelot Link, Secret Chimp! 

"Lance, Lance!  He stole the missing link!"

(that's the one line I remember from watching that show as a kid)
Title: Re: HELP! Chimps ate my nose and my testicles (Warning Graphic)
Post by: Popeye the Sailor on July 08, 2008, 07:02:02 PM
Bit his testicles off.


Seriously, what guy who's getting his ass kicked does not protect his junk? They'd have to chew my hands and forearms off first to get at my nuts at the very least.
Title: Re: HELP! Chimps ate my nose and my testicles (Warning Graphic)
Post by: silentbob on July 08, 2008, 10:00:51 PM
Quote from: someguy on July 08, 2008, 07:02:02 PM
Bit his testicles off.


Seriously, what guy who's getting his ass kicked does not protect his junk? They'd have to chew my hands and forearms off first to get at my nuts at the very least.

He is missing most of his fingers.
Title: Re: HELP! Chimps ate my nose and my testicles (Warning Graphic)
Post by: BWClark on July 11, 2008, 07:26:07 AM
Quote from: me on July 08, 2008, 10:00:51 PM
He is missing most of his fingers.
That's just proof he wasn't 100% committed to manhood.

Keeping the monkey around after it did that is proof he's not 100% committed to sanity.   [roll]
Title: Re: HELP! Chimps ate my nose and my testicles (Warning Graphic)
Post by: Grampa on July 11, 2008, 07:46:13 AM
(http://liquidangst.com/myspace/bong/Monkey_steals_peach.jpg)

ninja monkeys
Title: Re: HELP! Chimps ate my nose and my testicles (Warning Graphic)
Post by: Speedbag on July 11, 2008, 11:38:55 AM
"Monkey Steals The Peach"

[laugh]