Someone Gave You THAT? Worst Gift Ever?

[LMT]

Fess up. What is the worst gift you ever got?  Birthday, Christmas, etc.

Coal? A flaming bag of poo? An expired coupon?  What was it?

My worst was Christmas 1986.  I got out of the Air Force in April of that year. I moved to a state where I knew one person.  We had a falling apart, and for the first time ever I got nothing for Christmas. Not one card from family, not one gift at all. That was even worse then the year I was sick and missed Christmas altogether.

What say you? 

[SacDuc]

The worst gift at this point is ANY gift. I don't need stuff. I don't want stuff. I don't have room for stuff in my house. And I certainly don't want/need/have room for crappy stuff picked out for me buy someone who feels obligated too consume mindlessly on my behalf. Please just don't. Just tell me how you feel about me. Cards are nice. A shot and a beer and a chuck on the shoulder. Great. A warm smile. Perfect. I'd rather be told to make the beast with two backs off by someone who truly meant it than to have to shuffle a cheap piece of Chinese plastic around my house just long enough so that I don't feel too bad for throwing it away. My wife told her parents a thousand times not to get us anything. They will anyway. Likely in a few months they will subtly remind us that they did by inquiring about the item. Sigh.

If anyone reading this gets me stuff for Christmas I will punch you in the dick.

sac


/unless I can drink it and it contains alcohol and you will partake in it with me 

[duccarlos]

People love me and I only get cool gifts. Sorry.

[Grampa]

note to self.....  send Carl this

[zooom]

last year...my older brother asked me directly what I wanted for X-Mas...I sent him to a link on Ebay for a topcase for my motorcycle...this is 2 weeks before X-Mas...

Xmas afternoon with the 'rents and family and we are all exchanging gifts and I get this little plug in USB Motion activated noise making skull with a clearance price sticker on it for $1.99...obviously a novelty item from the computer store from a guy who makes 6 figures a year and he tells me, "this is your gift until you tell me something you want that isn't moto related, because I will not support your moto-habit, as I do not approve of you riding motorcycles"


needless to say...I am a lil bitter still and am considering sending him some elephant dung from that other thread....

[Bick]

The worst gift at this point is ANY gift. I don't need stuff. I don't want stuff. I don't have room for stuff in my house. And I certainly don't want/need/have room for crappy stuff picked out for me buy someone who feels obligated too consume mindlessly on my behalf. Please just don't. Just tell me how you feel about me. Cards are nice. A shot and a beer and a chuck on the shoulder. Great. A warm smile. Perfect. I'd rather be told to make the beast with two backs off by someone who truly meant it than to have to shuffle a cheap piece of Chinese plastic around my house just long enough so that I don't feel too bad for throwing it away. My wife told her parents a thousand times not to get us anything. They will anyway. Likely in a few months they will subtly remind us that they did by inquiring about the item. Sigh.

If anyone reading this gets me stuff for Christmas I will punch you in the dick.

sac


/unless I can drink it and it contains alcohol and you will partake in it with me 

And I was going to get you a shiney new 1198s.

[MendoDave]

I am soooo glad that I don't celebrate Christmas anymore. No trees, or lights, or spending money to buy people stuff they don't need, or getting stuff I don't need, no stress about it, and my family and I can still have a nice time together.   We cooked a Turkey last night for the reason of eating it and having turkey for the rest of the week, and instead of getting her some gift, we are planning a trip to Portland, Seattle, and Vancouver this April instead.

One of the best things about no Christmas are the lack of family fights and the resulting feuds that go on for years. I don't have to see anymore stuff like my cousin tell my Aunt she is an effin B, or my Grandmother chase my Grandfather around the house with the 22. or any of the other stuff that I could go on about...

[exertus]

The worst gift at this point is ANY gift. I don't need stuff. I don't want stuff. I don't have room for stuff in my house. And I certainly don't want/need/have room for crappy stuff picked out for me buy someone who feels obligated too consume mindlessly on my behalf. Please just don't. Just tell me how you feel about me. Cards are nice. A shot and a beer and a chuck on the shoulder. Great. A warm smile. Perfect. I'd rather be told to make the beast with two backs off by someone who truly meant it than to have to shuffle a cheap piece of Chinese plastic around my house just long enough so that I don't feel too bad for throwing it away. My wife told her parents a thousand times not to get us anything. They will anyway. Likely in a few months they will subtly remind us that they did by inquiring about the item. Sigh.

If anyone reading this gets me stuff for Christmas I will punch you in the dick.

sac

That's normally how I feel.  But this year I got a Ducati 1098S die cast Hot Wheels bike.  Best gift I've ever gotten.  First year.  Pearl white. 


/unless I can drink it and it contains alcohol and you will partake in it with me 

[SacDuc]

I am soooo glad that I don't celebrate Christmas anymore. No trees, or lights, or spending money to buy people stuff they don't need, or getting stuff I don't need, no stress about it, and my family and I can still have a nice time together.   We cooked a Turkey last night for the reason of eating it and having turkey for the rest of the week, and instead of getting her some gift, we are planning a trip to Portland, Seattle, and Vancouver this April instead.

One of the best things about no Christmas are the lack of family fights and the resulting feuds that go on for years. I don't have to see anymore stuff like my cousin tell my Aunt she is an effin B, or my Grandmother chase my Grandfather around the house with the 22. or any of the other stuff that I could go on about...

I read the first paragraph and was thinking "good for you man!"

Then I read the second paragraph and thought, "holy hell you can't buy that kind of entertainment! That man should get himself a bottle of Jagermeister and let the family disfunction come rolling on in!" I'd pump those crazy bastards so full of Goldschlager they'd be crapping cufflinks in the morning.

I mean, it beats the hell out of being the only one drinking in the afternoon because its the only way to cope with the fact that you're in for hours of people being passive aggressive and snide in their criticisms of each other's cooking and bathroom cleanliness. Its nauseating. When it devolves into sarcastic over politeness I thank god for the presence of good kids and rational dogs to play with.

sac

[Turf]

My extended family and I don't really talk to each other, We were all forced to go to Christmas at a lodge in the middle of a national park in Illinois, no cell signal, internet, no bike and snowed in. Comes time to exchange presents, I open the box and I've received a gord that has a string of christmas lights in it...



with lights shoved inside.

My mother got pink cotton balls

We don't think they like us much

There has yet to be an explanation

[Grampa]

its a dick in a gord set

[Drunken Monkey]

A friend got me coal once.

But it was from the Titanic, so it was cool coal.

[Buckethead]

One year when we were both in high school, my brother got me a CD (Adam Sandler's They're All Gonna Laugh At You) that I already owned. As soon as I'd unwrapped it, he asked if he could borrow it.

Dick.

[mitt]

Usually every year I get a bad one, and I get frustrated, cause I go out of the way to get them something unique, maybe hand made, etc.

Typical examples
- sweater from department store that when I return it I find out it is on clearance for like 11 dollars
- one size fits all baseball cap that doesn't fit and no return receipt

[fastwin]

One year when we were both in high school, my brother got me a CD (Adam Sandler's They're All Gonna Laugh At You) that I already owned. As soon as I'd unwrapped it, he asked if he could borrow it.

Dick.

My older brother's rule of gift giving is never give someone something that you can't borrow back and use for yourself.

My goofy as shit aunt used to give me finger nail clipper sets when I was a kid and #2 pencils with my name embossed on them. Weak shit.

My God awful make the beast with two backsing pregnant dog of a step mother (my Mom died in '76 and Dad remarried to the piece of shit 11 months later. I was a grown man by then.) gave one of my favorite nieces an empty box for a Christmas present!! No shit. It was a very nicely wrapped box but was empty as hell. The pregnant dog had no real good explanation and mumbled something about "I must have forgotten to put the gift inside". But she never said what the "gift" was nor did she ever produce anything in the way of a gift. The worthless pregnant dog died in 2001 and I drive by her grave every June 9th just to make sure she's still in there!