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Airport Body Scanners - What would you do?

Started by Monster Dave, May 04, 2011, 08:58:20 AM

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ducatiz

#30
May 04, 2011, 02:00:48 PM
Quote from: akmnstr on May 04, 2011, 01:58:01 PM
The almost being cuffed thing has to do with my temper tantrums and nothing to do with dildos yet.  I'm just a grumpy old fart that annoys everyone.  Based on what you say, that a dildo won't get me cuffed, I may just have to try it. 

I fly a lot for work and have yet to encounter a scanner.  I haven't decided yet what I'll do when I encounter one. 

yeah, they've had people show up with all kinds of prankish behavior.  as long as they complied, they were fine.

i thought about trying to get my wife to wear a strap on to the airport, but she would hit me with a brick for suggesting it .. she's a bit more straightlaced than me.
Check out my oil filter forensics thread!                     Offended? Click here
"Yelling out of cars, turning your speakers out the window to blast your music onto the street, setting off M-80 firecrackers, firing automatic weapons into the airâ€"these are all well and good. But none of them create a merry atmosphere of insouciance and bonhomie quite like a revving motorcycle.

Monster Dave

#31
May 04, 2011, 02:03:53 PM
Quote from: ducatiz on May 04, 2011, 02:00:48 PM
yeah, they've had people show up with all kinds of prankish behavior.  as long as they complied, they were fine.

i thought about trying to get my wife to wear a strap on to the airport, but she would hit me with a brick for suggesting it .. she's a bit more straightlaced than me.

[laugh]

duccarlos

#32
May 04, 2011, 02:04:01 PM
I have little choice in the matter. I need to fly once in a while, but not so much that this dosage of radiation will be a problem. So I will choose the convenient way to get through security. If having a 50 year old dude grab my junk gets me through the line quicker, then go for it.
Quote from: polivo on November 16, 2011, 12:18:55 PM
my keyboard just served me with paternity suit.

ducatiz

#33
May 04, 2011, 02:06:18 PM
Quote from: duccarlos on May 04, 2011, 02:04:01 PM
I have little choice in the matter. I need to fly once in a while, but not so much that this dosage of radiation will be a problem. So I will choose the convenient way to get through security. If having a 50 year old dude grab my junk gets me through the line quicker, then go for it.

what if he's wearing a clown suit and taking pictures of you?
Check out my oil filter forensics thread!                     Offended? Click here
"Yelling out of cars, turning your speakers out the window to blast your music onto the street, setting off M-80 firecrackers, firing automatic weapons into the airâ€"these are all well and good. But none of them create a merry atmosphere of insouciance and bonhomie quite like a revving motorcycle.

lethe

#34
May 04, 2011, 02:13:55 PM
Quote from: ducatiz on May 04, 2011, 02:06:18 PM
what if he's wearing a clown suit and taking pictures of you?
then you just pretend it's your birthday
'05 Monster 620
'86 FZ600
'05 KTM SMC 625

Kopfjager

#35
May 04, 2011, 02:23:28 PM
"Castillo complained about her treatment at the Dallas airport, saying a TSA agent touched her "vagina" four times during a pat-down."


http://today.msnbc.msn.com/id/42877532/
Woohoohoohoo! Two personal records! For breath holding and number of sharks shot in the face.

Speedbag

#36
May 04, 2011, 02:27:08 PM
Quote from: Raux on May 04, 2011, 01:24:12 PM
get a nice raging hardon and then get scanned

This.

Makes for an awkward moment or two with the patdown folks also. Accompanied by a wink or two.
I tend to regard most of humanity as little more than walking talking dilated sphincters. - Rat

akmnstr

#37
May 04, 2011, 02:31:14 PM
Quote from: kopfjäger on May 04, 2011, 02:23:28 PM
"Castillo complained about her treatment at the Dallas airport, saying a TSA agent touched her "vagina" four times during a pat-down."


http://today.msnbc.msn.com/id/42877532/


Quotehow far will the TSA go, asking “Are rectal exams in our future?”

Actually for most men, they are.  But not at the airport
"you may all go to hell, and I will go to Texas!!" Davey Crockett & AKmnstr

"An American monkey, after getting drunk on brandy, would never touch it again, and thus is much wiser than most men."
Charles Darwin

"I don't know what people expect when they meet me. They seem to be afraid that I'm going to piss in the potted palm and slap them on the ass." Marlon Brando

ducatiz

#38
May 04, 2011, 02:41:46 PM
Quote from: kopfjäger on May 04, 2011, 02:23:28 PM
"Castillo complained about her treatment at the Dallas airport, saying a TSA agent touched her "vagina" four times during a pat-down."


http://today.msnbc.msn.com/id/42877532/



the article doesn't mention that she's actually 650 lbs and touching her "vagina" is hard to avoid
Check out my oil filter forensics thread!                     Offended? Click here
"Yelling out of cars, turning your speakers out the window to blast your music onto the street, setting off M-80 firecrackers, firing automatic weapons into the airâ€"these are all well and good. But none of them create a merry atmosphere of insouciance and bonhomie quite like a revving motorcycle.

RAT900

#39
May 04, 2011, 02:47:12 PM
Its all a waste of time

as suicide bombers will just get more sophisticated in their delivery systems

a walking human with surgically implanted C4 or whatever new designer plastic explosives are on the market,

a laptop with a good battery in it

and a pair of wire leads coming out of their "pacemaker" can't be that far ahead on the horizon
This is an insult to the Pez community

RAT900

#40
May 04, 2011, 02:52:15 PM
Quote from: ducatiz on May 04, 2011, 02:41:46 PM

the article doesn't mention that she's actually 650 lbs and touching her "vagina" is hard to avoid


her vagine...start to hang loose like sleeve of wizard



This is an insult to the Pez community

lethe

#41
May 04, 2011, 02:53:32 PM
Quote from: RAT900 on May 04, 2011, 02:47:12 PM
Its all a waste of time

as suicide bombers will just get more sophisticated in their delivery systems

a walking human with surgically implanted C4 or whatever new designer plastic explosives are on the market,

a laptop with a good battery in it

and a pair of wire leads coming out of their "pacemaker" can't be that far ahead on the horizon
ever the optimist
Do you have any good uplifting predictions for the weather as well?  [cheeky]
'05 Monster 620
'86 FZ600
'05 KTM SMC 625

Drjones

#42
May 04, 2011, 02:54:29 PM
I'll drive.  I'm also thinking about finally getting my pilots license, so I can use my dad's C172.

Another reason to refuse the "Security Theatre" lines: "Airport passenger screener charged in distributing child pornography"

"Live like no one else now, so that you can live like no one else tomorrow."

"Wealth is more often the result of a lifestyle of hard work, perseverance, planning, and, most of all, self discipline.”

"Helping poor and suffering people is compassion. Voting for our government to use guns to give money to help poor and suffering people is immoral self-righteous bullying laziness."

zarn02

#43
May 04, 2011, 02:56:41 PM
Quote from: kopfjäger on May 04, 2011, 02:23:28 PM
"Castillo complained about her treatment at the Dallas airport, saying a TSA agent touched her "vagina" four times during a pat-down."

Why is vagina in quotes? Are we not sure that's what it really is?
"If it weren't for our gallows humor, we'd have nothing to hang our hopes on."

RAT900

#44
May 04, 2011, 02:59:17 PM
Quote from: lethe on May 04, 2011, 02:53:32 PM
ever the optimist
Do you have any good uplifting predictions for the weather as well?  [cheeky]

Ambrose Bierce, from the Devils Dictionary

OPTIMISM, n.
The doctrine, or belief, that everything is beautiful, including what is ugly, everything good, especially the bad, and everything right that is wrong. It is held with greatest tenacity by those most accustomed to the mischance of falling into adversity, and is most acceptably expounded with the grin that apes a smile. Being a blind faith, it is inaccessible to the light of disproof -- an intellectual disorder, yielding to no treatment but death. It is hereditary, but fortunately not contagious.

CYNIC, n.
A blackguard whose faulty vision sees things as they are, not as they ought to be. Hence the custom among the Scythians of plucking out a cynic's eyes to improve his vision.
This is an insult to the Pez community
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