The FBI investigated me

[ducatiz]

ANTI-TERRORIST AND MONITORY CRIMES DIVISION.
FEDERAL BUREAU OF INVESTIGATION.
J. EDGAR. HOOVER BUILDING, WASHINGTON D.C
ATTN: BENEFICIARY.

This is to officially inform you that it has come to our notice and we have thoroughly completed an Investigated with the help of our Intelligence monitoring Network System that you are having an illegal transaction with impostors claiming to be Prof. Charles C. Soludo of the Central Bank Of Nigeria, Mr. Patrick Aziza, none officials of Oceanic Bank, none officials of Zenith Bank and some impostors from other part of the world claiming to be the Federal Bureau Of Investigation agents. During our Investigation, it came to our notice that the reason why you have not received your payment is because you have not fulfilled your Financial Obligation given to you in respect of your Contract/Inheritance Payment.
So therefore, we have contacted the Federal Ministry of Finance on your behalf and they have brought a solution to your problem by coordinating your payment in the total amount of $5,000,000.00 USD which will be deposited into an ATM CARD which you will use to withdraw funds anywhere of the world. You now have the lawful right to claim your funds which have been deposited into the ATM CARD.
Since the Federal Bureau of Investigation has been involved in this transaction, you are now to be rest assured that this transaction is legitimate and completely risk-free as it is our duty to protect and Serve citizens of the United States of America. All you have to do is immediately contact the ATM CARD CENTER via E-mail for instructions on how to procure your Approval Slip which contains details on how to receive and activate your ATM CARD for immediate use to withdraw funds being paid to you. We have confirmed that the amount required to procure the Approval Slip will cost you a total of $196USD which will be paid directly to the ATM CARD CENTER agent via western union money transfer / money gram Money Transfer. Below, you shall find contact details of the Agent whom will process your transaction from Federal Minister of Finance:
CONTACT INFORMATION
FEDERAL MINISTER OF FINANCE.
ATM CARD CENTRE
NAME: MR. JOHN SMITH
OFFICE LINE: +234-16661009
EMAIL: atmfederalministryfinanceee@gmail.com
Immediately contact Mr. John Smith of the ATM Card Centre with the following information:
FULL NAME:
ADDRESS:
CITY:
STATE:
ZIP CODE:
DIRECT PHONE NUMBER:
CURRENT OCCUPATION:
ANNUAL INCOME:
Once you have sent the required information to Mr. John Smith he will contact you with instructions on how to make the payment of $290 USD for the Approval Slip after which he will proceed towards delivery of the ATM CARD without any further delay. You have hereby been authorized/guaranteed by the   Federal Bureau of Investigation to commence towards completing this transaction, as there shall be NO delay once payment for the Approval Slip has been made to the authorized agent.
Once you have completed payment of $290 to the agent in charge of this transaction, immediately contact us back for more investigation for conformation of your ATM card.
Federal Bureau Investigation
Robert S. Mueller Director, FBI
Contact us at:usafbi3@live.com     

[Sinister]

Hmmm...Posing as a Federal officer is quite a major crime.

[ducducgooseme]

it was your avatar....forced them to investigate you 

[ryandalling]

Oh... the Nigerian Banker scam has evolved... how cool of them. This just makes for more things they can be charged with... should anybody actually catch them. Total pain for the elderly who trust this stuff... 

[Bick]

But I already paid my $290 for processing... 

I sent it to someone in Southern Colorado who moved and bought a 1098. 

[vwboomer]

I can't believe that there are people stupid enough to actually fall for these things....but you know they're out there.

[Grampa]

Freaky
Booty
Inspector

[eltristo]

[snippy]
Robert S. Mueller Director, FBI
Contact us at:usafbi3@live.com     

It MUST be legit... it's from the Director himself!  And it's even got a totally official gubmint sounding email address!  Hop to it, you silly vietnamese lesbian! 

[Scottish]

But I already paid my $290 for processing... 

I sent it to someone in Southern Colorado who moved and bought a 1098. 

I didn't move or buy a 1098, I wasted your money on crack and stopped answering the phone. Please stop calling you are waking the missus.  and Ducatizzzzzzz this is sooooooooo legit, send the money NOW get your ATM card in time for Christmas!!! 

[DRKWNG]

Hop to it, you silly vietnamese lesbian! 

Jeesh Tristan, I almost sprayed tea all over my computer when I read that. 

[erkishhorde]

Let's play spot the error!
Who can find the most spelling/ grammatical errors?

[eltristo]

Let's play spot the error!
Who can find the most spelling/ grammatical errors?

I don't know that counting goes that high 

[Drjones]

Hmmm...Posing as a Federal officer is quite a major crime.

Like any of these scammers care.  The whole country of Nigeria is corrupt to the bone and they have oil reserves, so no one is going to say boo to them.

[the_Journeyman]

Something tells me the e-mail address would be from XXXXXX@fbi.gov or something of the like. 

JM

[roy-nexus-6]

I played a Nigerian scammer for THREE months.... that was my goal, 90 days.. and he nearly bailed on me a few times. I still have the emails! good times, good times! 

It was extremely satisfying knowing a scumbag somewhere was literally going crazy with frustration. The funniest example I've ever seen was the p-p-powerbook counter-scam. 

http://www.encyclopediadramatica.com/index.php/P-p-p-powerbook