Your best story

[SacDuc]

i was born in feb 1980 -_-

old bastids, keep the stories coming.. seems you older folks have better stories..  

It takes practice. Unless you were raised poorly or are in some way pathological, good stories can be hard to make. There's always that little angel on your shoulder that says, "You souldn't do that." But if you ignore it enough that make the beast with two backsing killjoy gives up after a while. Then the good stories happen. Of course being young, stupid, drunk and reckless helps as well.

sac

[El Matador]

This one here is pretty good:

http://ducatimonsterforum.org/index.php?topic=26965.msg491937#msg491937

[Bun-bun]

wow.....it must be nice to have parents that understand and aren't dicks about that sort of thing.

Just so you don't go nominating me for sainthood or sumthin'. . .
El Matador's story reminded me.
About the same time as the swelling incident, my son started to lie.
Constantly
and badly
We tried what we knew, grounding, removal of privileges, a good smack in the chops, etc., nothing worked for more than a few days. Finally, one day, he came home and told us some bogus story about one of his teachers, which he then admitted was a lie when we made as if to call the school and talk to that teacher.
I had a sudden rush of brains to the head, and grabbed a piece of cardboard and a sharpie, and wrote "I am a liar, and cannot be trusted", took some string, and made him hang it around his neck. We then went out of the house, and walked around the neighborhood, and he got to explain to all of the kids we met why he was wearing a sign.
When we were done, I hung the sign in the living room and told him we would do this every time he lied.
It worked.

[DoubleEagle]

It was in the Summer time. My Brother was still in High School and I think I had just graduated.

My Brother tells me that a bunch of hot chicks from his class are having a slumber party and it's at so and so's house not too far away .

Well we get the idea to check it out.

So about 1 am we sneak out of the house and actually walk to this house .

We scope it out as best we can in the moonlight and we can her the music playing and the girls laughing so my Brother gets the bright idea to go up to the house and he pears into a bedroom window and there are several girls in there.

Well some how he got noticed and identified so we backed off but he said he heard the girls talking about walking up to a Cemetery .

So I thought it would be cool to go hide in the Cemetery and try to scare the pants of the chicks when they got there.

Sure enough , in just a little bit we could hear them coming.

I was hiding behind one of the biggest Tombstones in a not very big Cemetery.
[evil
When the girls got there and started to walk into the Cemetery I heard one say " Wouldn't it be really scary if someone rose up out of one of these Graves " and w, that I climbed up on the Tombstone, then jumped off and and shrieked as loud as I could !

Well they all went running , screaming back towards the house but what my Brother and I didn't know was when he was identified peeking in the bedroom window , one of the girls told her Mother who in turn called and woke up my Parents , who in turn were really pissed off at us and were waiting for us when we tried to sneak back into the house.

We got a good scolding and and lost car privileges for a week.

It was worth it to her those girls squeal and scream.

Dolph        

[Duck-Stew]

Ducati related:

How I snuck 2 Ducati Monsters onto Ducati Island for free for the entire weekend:

June 2006 found me working late nights and early mornings trying hard to finish up the Coup D'etat for a debut on Ducati Island which was the next month.  Through some bad luck, I ended up breaking my L. thumb about 3 weeks before the event. 

Evidence of broken thumb:


Let me go on the record here:  If it were not for the never wavering help of my good friend Gil G (m9hundo here on the board) during those weeks, the bike would never had made it to the island.  No F'n way.  He is an amazing guy and I'll never forget him or his help in my hour of need.

Back to the story:  With the help of other SoCal DMF'ers we got damn, damn close to the bike being finished and ready for Ducati Island.  In fact, by the time we got the bikes on the trailer it was 1 pm on Thursday (IIRC).  I called Gary Eagan on his cell and asked him if I could get my bikes onto the island for display.  He said 'sure!', but you have to be here by 2pm.  Uh, yeah...we're like 6 hours away.  So, an official escorted and welcomed entrance was not going to happen.  We kept rollin'.  Where there's a will....  and damn did we have some will!

We pressed on despite the obvious challenge that lay ahead.  By the time we got up to Monterey (about 5 miles from Laguna), it was late and dark-ish.  We met up with Jeff H, Michael Moore and Drunken Monkey (IIRC) and got some dinner.  Since we had no lodging, we decided it was a good idea to spend the night in Gil's p/u truck w/the bikes still on the open trailer.  Eh, by this point...it was late so we did it.  Slept for sh*t but anyone who's ever slept in a p/u truck will already know that.

Morning came and the bikes were still on the trailer:


Gil was...um...across the street taking a sunrise photo I think.


Morning came and we got up early and got ready to go to the track w/still NO plan.  We drove up to the track gate to see if we could talk our way in.  That was a no-go (would've been too damned easy anyhow!).    Here's how stupid I am: I have a broken thumb in an arm cast.  So, I think it's a good idea to cut the sleeve of my textile jacket so I can get my cast through it and then RIDE my Cafe-Racer the 4 or so miles down a 15mph heavily enforced military base road to get onto the track.  Yeah.  Sometimes when my thumb cracks a funny way (even today) I just don't even wonder why.  Let's just say I was a-hurtin' sumptin' fierce by the time I got to the track and then had to ride around through the crowds looking for Ducati Island as I'd never been there before. 

Hind-sight?  Stupid as hell.

In the moment?  Great idea! 

Ok, so the CR's on the island.  One down, one to go.  Bear in mind that we never really did finish up the Coup D'etat.  She was a roller, but not a runner at that point.  Ended up talking w/Jeff H who mentioned that his wife had a friend who had a gelato / pasta booth nearby who had a Vendor Pass.  We walked over and I ended up making some kind of ridiculous promise of returning it and he loaned it to me.    

Jeff had something to do 'real quickly'...  Well, that turned into almost an hour before he returned and we got on his M620 w/me on the back again in my cut-up textile jacket and rolled out the 4 miles on the military road to the main drag where Gil was still waiting patiently for my return.  By this point....it was literally almost 2 hours.  Poor guy just waited w/o food or water.  What a trooper!  Jeff dropped me off, and returned onto the island.  Thanks again Jeff!  I had Gil drive to the nearest food location he wanted and immediately bought him lunch and a LARGE soda...  Gil's demise was averted for another day. 

Now the fun part.  Convincing the track officials that we indeed did belong on the island w/a bike that didn't run, a borrowed Vendor Pass and some dumb-dumb luck.  We drove back through the same gate we did earlier and quickly flashed the vendor pass making up some BS about how we were late and this bike absolutely HAD to be on Ducati Island like right now!  Well...it worked and they let us through in the p/u truck and the bike on the trailer.  I began to breath a little easier at this point...

We rolled the truck down to a large dirt turn-around and began to unload it when I hear this loud voice shouting something about how she couldn't have me parked there as there was a bus w/120 tourists on it that needed to unload RIGHT HERE in 2 minutes!!!  My cool and collected reply, "GREAT!.......We'll be out of here in 1."    At that she actually helped us unload the bike right there.    Gil took the pass and the truck to a grassy hill A LONG WAY from anywhere so he could park it w/o the pass in it (we had to return it) and hopefully the security wouldn't go that far up the hill to see if there was a pass or not...

I paddled the Coup D'etat out of the unloading zone to comply w/my 1 minute promise and began removing the duct-tape from the carb so I could hang the air-cleaner on it.  As I was doing this, I felt eyes watching me.  I looked up to see about 8-10 people in a semi-circle just staring slack-jawed.     I smiled and made some smart-ass remark that I don't recall... 

Gil ended up cutting up a piece of newspaper to resemble the Vendor Pass and walking like a MILE or so down to Ducati Island to meet up w/me.  I had dog-paddled the Coup D'etat right next to the CR *RIGHT* at the entrance...


^^That's Gil, BTW...^^

Met Toasty for the first-time!



Well, we had some more adventures that weekend but they paled in comparison to the above...  Damn was that fun!



^^^That, right there....is one tired but happy Mo-Fo. 

[SacDuc]

[Duck-Stew]

Too tired tonight, but the story of how I snuck onto Ducati Island for 2007 was also an epic tale of lies and deceit.  


...oh yeah, and it involves a neon green gift bag too.   

[krolik]

I was one of the people that brought Toasty down to Laguna Seca. I remember meeting you and marveling at the Coup.

[NoisyDante]

/did everyone know that they serve beer at Chuck E Cheese?
//and that you don't actually need to have a kid with you to be there?
///and that they don't really seem to have a protocol for dealing with two drunks who won't stop hogging the basketball game?
////and that I love my brother deeply for saying, "Hell yeah!" when I spotted said Chuck E Cheese on the way to the next bar and suggested we stop?

You can also get beer at Disney Animal Kingdom.  I used to date Tinker Bell there.  That was interesting getting blasted and wandering around the park while young strange children recognize my girlfriend as being Tinker Bell (though out of uniform) and then noticing her soused boyfriend.

[RAT900]

You can also get beer at Disney Animal Kingdom.  I used to date Tinker Bell there.  That was interesting getting blasted and wandering around the park while young strange children recognize my girlfriend as being Tinker Bell (though out of uniform) and then noticing her soused boyfriend.

make the beast with two backs the beer stuff!!..........You make the beast with two backsing scored Tinkerbell??....that icon of magical delicate and fragile beauty and innocence??  

you are my make the beast with two backsing Hero!!  Did you boink her "in-costume"?

This is wonderful....

I am here on my other (work) PC trying to write something meaningful about architecting the foundation infrastructure for Unified Communications migration strategies...

and here you are sharing about getting wasted and having Tinkerbell in your hands...guess which one is more important??

oh yes there is a make the beast with two backsing god...please please phots with narrative

[SacDuc]

You can also get beer at Disney Animal Kingdom.  I used to date Tinker Bell there.  That was interesting getting blasted and wandering around the park while young strange children recognize my girlfriend as being Tinker Bell (though out of uniform) and then noticing her soused boyfriend.

Um, dude? This is the story thread. You don't just say you dated Tinker Bell and leave it at that. How make the beast with two backsing dare you! Now make with the story about the first time she brought the costume home.

sac

[The Bacon Junkie]

Too tired tonight, but the story of how I snuck onto Ducati Island for 2007 was also an epic tale of lies and deceit.  


...oh yeah, and it involves a neon green gift bag too.   

Sneaking in for 3 free days at the '09 GP was a whole lotta fun too!   

[Speedbag]

make the beast with two backs the beer stuff!!..........You make the beast with two backsing scored Tinkerbell??....that icon of magical delicate and fragile beauty and innocence??  

you are my make the beast with two backsing Hero!!  Did you boink her "in-costume"?

This is wonderful....

I am here on my other (work) PC trying to write something meaningful about architecting the foundation infrastructure for Unified Communications migration strategies...

and here you are sharing about getting wasted and having Tinkerbell in your hands...guess which one is more important??

oh yes there is a make the beast with two backsing god...please please phots with narrative

+1

Naughty thoughts abound....

[Buckethead]

make the beast with two backs the beer stuff!!..........You make the beast with two backsing scored Tinkerbell??....that icon of magical delicate and fragile beauty and innocence?? 

you are my make the beast with two backsing Hero!!  Did you boink her "in-costume"?

This is wonderful....

I am here on my other (work) PC trying to write something meaningful about architecting the foundation infrastructure for Unified Communications migration strategies...

and here you are sharing about getting wasted and having Tinkerbell in your hands...guess which one is more important??

oh yes there is a make the beast with two backsing god...please please phots with narrative

Clap if you believe.

[cyrus buelton]

/did everyone know that they serve beer at Chuck E Cheese?
//and that you don't actually need to have a kid with you to be there?
///and that they don't really seem to have a protocol for dealing with two drunks who won't stop hogging the basketball game?
////and that I love my brother deeply for saying, "Hell yeah!" when I spotted said Chuck E Cheese on the way to the next bar and suggested we stop?

Yeah, I figured that out when I was home from college one summer. I think I was 19 or 20. My nice NJ License (of course my address on it was a strip club in Newark) worked brilliantly.

I think a pitcher of bud light or miller lite was seriously only 4$. It was great.


I do recall talking shit about skeetball to some little kid, but that is to be expected.

Reason I was there:

was with a girl I was trying to hook up with and she had to babysit last minute.

Needless to say.......I was unsuccessful.