Ducati Monster Forum

Kitchen Sink => No Moto Content => Topic started by: ducatiz on August 11, 2009, 05:49:42 PM

Title: Statler and Ducpainter are assholes
Post by: ducatiz on August 11, 2009, 05:49:42 PM
MIGHTY FINE ASSHOLES, I MUST SAY!

(http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_sEaTcl6fG3I/SecQEPoRulI/AAAAAAAAA9c/PUnbixBOU_A/s400/beer_toast(1).jpg)
Title: Re: Statler and Ducpainter are assholes
Post by: That Nice Guy Beck! on August 11, 2009, 05:50:54 PM
corny
Title: Re: Statler and Ducpainter are assholes
Post by: Statler on August 11, 2009, 05:51:39 PM
flattery and beer will get you nowhere a fair hearing.


(we still need ot organize a beverage some evening)
Title: Re: Statler and Ducpainter are assholes
Post by: ducatiz on August 11, 2009, 05:52:24 PM
Quote from: Statler on August 11, 2009, 05:51:39 PM
flattery and beer will get you nowhere a fair hearing.


(we still need ot organize a beverage some evening)

i know.  wait until i am not elbow deep in diapers, unless you want to venture further out of the Land of Marys.
Title: Re: Statler and Ducpainter are assholes
Post by: Statler on August 11, 2009, 05:52:59 PM
Quote from: That Nice Guy Beck! on August 11, 2009, 05:50:54 PM
corny

Beck, of all the threads that you know nothing about, please stay out of this one.   You don't know me or Nate and this one is personal.  
Title: Re: Statler and Ducpainter are assholes
Post by: Statler on August 11, 2009, 05:53:54 PM
Quote from: ducatiz on August 11, 2009, 05:52:24 PM
i know.  wait until i am not elbow deep in diapers, unless you want to venture further out of the Land of Marys.

I know that feeling.   I'll travel.   But I won't change your kid's diapers.
Title: Re: Statler and Ducpainter are assholes
Post by: ducatiz on August 11, 2009, 05:54:26 PM
Quote from: Statler on August 11, 2009, 05:53:54 PM
I know that feeling.   I'll travel.   But I won't change your kid's diapers.


how about dishes?  catbox?  anything? 
Title: Re: Statler and Ducpainter are assholes
Post by: Statler on August 11, 2009, 05:56:51 PM
I'll scoop the litter once, but then you're buying rounds one through four.
Title: Re: Statler and Ducpainter are assholes
Post by: ducatiz on August 11, 2009, 05:57:31 PM
Quote from: Statler on August 11, 2009, 05:56:51 PM
I'll scoop the litter once, but then you're buying rounds one through four.

shit, i got cash, i just don't have TIME  :D
Title: Re: Statler and Ducpainter are assholes
Post by: Porsche Monkey on August 11, 2009, 06:09:05 PM
Ducatiz I think your an asshole too. How can I join the club?  Ill buy the first five rounds, that is if you drink tequila.  ;D






















Disclaimer;  don't take me seriously. 
Title: Re: Statler and Ducpainter are assholes
Post by: ducatiz on August 11, 2009, 06:10:50 PM
Quote from: Ducaholic on August 11, 2009, 06:09:05 PM
Ducatiz I think your an asshole too. How can I join the club?  Ill buy the first five rounds, that is if you drink tequila.  ;D

Disclaimer;  don't take me seriously. 

I am Klingon, I have two livers.

Bring it on.  Wepa!

AS LONG AS it's at least Anejo tequila.  I can't drink that unaged crap, it's like drinking cologne.
Title: Re: Statler and Ducpainter are assholes
Post by: Statler on August 11, 2009, 06:15:16 PM
Quote from: ducatiz on August 11, 2009, 06:10:50 PM
I am Klingon, I have two livers.

Bring it on.  Wepa!

AS LONG AS it's at least Anejo tequila.  I can't drink that unaged crap, it's like drinking cologne.

a round of clear cologne here my good man.

oh wait.....five rounds of clear cologne here my good man.   ;D
Title: Re: Statler and Ducpainter are assholes
Post by: ducpainter on August 11, 2009, 06:20:04 PM
No one has any vodka?
Title: Re: Statler and Ducpainter are assholes
Post by: Statler on August 11, 2009, 06:21:03 PM
Quote from: ducpainter on August 11, 2009, 06:20:04 PM
No one has any vodka?

Beck left with it.  sorry.   He'll see you at dimby.   ;D
Title: Re: Statler and Ducpainter are assholes
Post by: Porsche Monkey on August 11, 2009, 06:22:00 PM
How bout a compromise of some that's been well rested?  I can get some nice Titos for the elder arsehole.
Title: Re: Statler and Ducpainter are assholes
Post by: ducatiz on August 11, 2009, 06:23:55 PM
Quote from: ducpainter on August 11, 2009, 06:20:04 PM
No one has any vodka?

the problem with vodka is that you can't age it.  it tastes the same after any amount of time.

i have some windex that might work.
Title: Re: Statler and Ducpainter are assholes
Post by: ducpainter on August 11, 2009, 06:26:03 PM
Quote from: Ducaholic on August 11, 2009, 06:22:00 PM
How bout a compromise of some that's been well rested?  I can get some nice Titos for the elder arsehole.
I'd drink that.
Title: Re: Statler and Ducpainter are assholes
Post by: ducpainter on August 11, 2009, 06:27:04 PM
Quote from: ducatiz on August 11, 2009, 06:23:55 PM
the problem with vodka is that you can't age it.  it tastes the same after any amount of time.

i have some windex that might work.
give me long enough after the vodka is gone and I'll drink that too.
Title: Re: Statler and Ducpainter are assholes
Post by: ducatiz on August 11, 2009, 06:30:47 PM
Quote from: ducpainter on August 11, 2009, 06:27:04 PM
give me long enough after the vodka is gone and I'll drink that too.

that's just so olympia dukakis.
Title: Re: Statler and Ducpainter are assholes
Post by: mstevens on August 11, 2009, 06:32:15 PM
Quote from: ducatiz on August 11, 2009, 06:10:50 PMit's like drinking cologne.

You say that as if it's a bad thing...
Title: Re: Statler and Ducpainter are assholes
Post by: ducatiz on August 11, 2009, 06:33:23 PM
Quote from: mstevens on August 11, 2009, 06:32:15 PM
You say that as if it's a bad thing...

[laugh]
Title: Re: Statler and Ducpainter are assholes
Post by: cyrus buelton on August 11, 2009, 06:38:25 PM
I'll bring you some Colt 45 or Mickeys, 'tizzy.

I can swing the steele reserve, but only on special order.
Title: Re: Statler and Ducpainter are assholes
Post by: Porsche Monkey on August 11, 2009, 06:43:10 PM
Quote from: ducpainter on August 11, 2009, 06:26:03 PM
I'd drink that.


Its a Texas made vodka.  Won some awards. I've had it and would drink it again.
http://www.titos-vodka.com/ (http://www.titos-vodka.com/)
Title: Re: Statler and Ducpainter are assholes
Post by: ducpainter on August 11, 2009, 06:45:35 PM
Quote from: Ducaholic on August 11, 2009, 06:43:10 PM

Its a Texas made vodka.  Won some awards. I've had it and would drink it again.
http://www.titos-vodka.com/ (http://www.titos-vodka.com/)
Already did a quick browse... ;)
Title: Re: Statler and Ducpainter are assholes
Post by: ducatiz on August 11, 2009, 06:52:24 PM
Quote from: Ducaholic on August 11, 2009, 06:43:10 PM

Its a Texas made vodka.  Won some awards. I've had it and would drink it again.
http://www.titos-vodka.com/ (http://www.titos-vodka.com/)

wtf, next there will be tequila from Greenland and gin from China.
Title: Re: Statler and Ducpainter are assholes
Post by: A.duc.H.duc. on August 11, 2009, 06:54:13 PM
Quote from: ducpainter on August 11, 2009, 06:20:04 PM
No one has any vodka?

I'll bring some vodka, but I'm more of a scotch man
Title: Re: Statler and Ducpainter are assholes
Post by: Porsche Monkey on August 11, 2009, 06:58:05 PM
Quote from: ducatiz on August 11, 2009, 06:52:24 PM
wtf, next there will be tequila from Greenland and gin from China.


I kinda thought the same thing when I first tried it but its pretty good.
Title: Re: Statler and Ducpainter are assholes
Post by: ducatiz on August 11, 2009, 07:00:32 PM
Quote from: Ducaholic on August 11, 2009, 06:58:05 PM

I kinda thought the same thing when I first tried it but its pretty good.

yeah yeah yeah.. it's booze, i know..  once you have a few, it could be donkey piss brewed in a stump..
Title: Re: Statler and Ducpainter are assholes
Post by: ducpainter on August 11, 2009, 07:00:44 PM
Quote from: ducatiz on August 11, 2009, 06:52:24 PM
wtf, next there will be tequila from Greenland and gin from China.
No gin...

no way...

no how. [bang]
Title: Re: Statler and Ducpainter are assholes
Post by: ducatiz on August 11, 2009, 07:01:52 PM
Quote from: ducpainter on August 11, 2009, 07:00:44 PM
No gin...

no way...

no how. [bang]

i make the best make the beast with two backsing gin gimlet that you will ever taste.  i make all my mixed drinks from scratch.  get some class, man, drink some gin!
Title: Re: Statler and Ducpainter are assholes
Post by: KnightofNi on August 11, 2009, 07:03:26 PM
i'm just wondering how many assholes one has to sample to become a valid judge of them.

is there an asshole judging school?



;D
Title: Re: Statler and Ducpainter are assholes
Post by: ducpainter on August 11, 2009, 07:04:55 PM
Quote from: ducatiz on August 11, 2009, 07:01:52 PM
i make the best make the beast with two backsing gin gimlet that you will ever taste.  i make all my mixed drinks from scratch.  get some class, man, drink some gin!
I took that gin class a long time ago.

I wretch just smelling it.

It's a really long story. 8)

Quote from: KnightofNi on August 11, 2009, 07:03:26 PM
i'm just wondering how many assholes one has to sample to become a valid judge of them.

is there an asshole judging school?



;D
It kinda takes one to know one.
Title: Re: Statler and Ducpainter are assholes
Post by: Statler on August 11, 2009, 07:06:22 PM
Quote from: ducatiz on August 11, 2009, 07:01:52 PM
i make the best make the beast with two backsing gin gimlet that you will ever taste.  i make all my mixed drinks from scratch.  get some class, man, drink some gin!

I loooove gin.

I'm waiting.
Title: Re: Statler and Ducpainter are assholes
Post by: ducatiz on August 11, 2009, 07:08:29 PM
Quote from: ducpainter on August 11, 2009, 07:04:55 PM
I took that gin class a long time ago.

I wretch just smelling it.

despite my heritage, i nearly poisoned myself on vodka at the tender age of 16 after swigging about a litre of it (with pals, it was one of those jugs of Absolut).  I've never really recovered. 

Quote
It kinda takes one to know one.

>>puffing proudly<<
Title: Re: Statler and Ducpainter are assholes
Post by: KopfjÀger on August 11, 2009, 07:08:54 PM
I googled asshole judges.  ;D

http://www.hobotrashcan.com/2009/03/23/outside-of-the-in-crowd-things-assholes-like-judging-others/ (http://www.hobotrashcan.com/2009/03/23/outside-of-the-in-crowd-things-assholes-like-judging-others/)
Title: Re: Statler and Ducpainter are assholes
Post by: ducatiz on August 11, 2009, 07:11:02 PM
Quote from: Statler on August 11, 2009, 07:06:22 PM
I loooove gin.

I'm waiting.

hmm.  i've never had a request for the izzy gimlet at a party, only my margueritas. 

the trick is to use fresh lime and cane sugar (for both) and reduce with water. 

then...

freeze some of that lime mix into cubes.  the sugar makes it hard to freeze, so you gotta use a smaller amount of sugar for the cube mix.

works.  i want to buy a deep freeze so i can freeze the actual mix.

i am a crafty lush.
Title: Re: Statler and Ducpainter are assholes
Post by: KnightofNi on August 11, 2009, 07:12:38 PM
Quote from: ducpainter on August 11, 2009, 07:04:55 PM

It kinda takes one to know one.

Quote from: ducatiz on August 11, 2009, 07:08:29 PM

>>puffing proudly<<

ohh yeah, i forgot who we were dealing with here.  ;)
Title: Re: Statler and Ducpainter are assholes
Post by: Rev. Millertime on August 11, 2009, 07:40:26 PM
You dare leave the "Professional Asshole" out of this?







<<<<<<   ;D
Title: Re: Statler and Ducpainter are assholes
Post by: Statler on August 11, 2009, 07:41:37 PM
Quote from: Rev. Millertime on August 11, 2009, 07:40:26 PM
You dare leave the "Professional Asshole" out of this?







<<<<<<   ;D

'sup, Wade.    when are we going shooting?
Title: Re: Statler and Ducpainter are assholes
Post by: ducatiz on August 11, 2009, 07:42:10 PM
Quote from: Rev. Millertime on August 11, 2009, 07:40:26 PM
You dare leave the "Professional Asshole" out of this?

not that i would dare disrespect your profession, but i thought politicians had the market on producing shit, i didn't know there were unelected professional assholes...   [beer]
Title: Re: Statler and Ducpainter are assholes
Post by: ducpainter on August 11, 2009, 07:47:02 PM
Quote from: Rev. Millertime on August 11, 2009, 07:40:26 PM
You dare leave the "Professional Asshole" out of this?







<<<<<<   ;D
Is that different from diamond studded asshole?
Title: Re: Statler and Ducpainter are assholes
Post by: ducatiz on August 11, 2009, 07:49:35 PM
Quote from: ducpainter on August 11, 2009, 07:47:02 PM
Is that different from diamond studded asshole?

i heard that's curable nowadays
Title: Re: Statler and Ducpainter are assholes
Post by: ducpainter on August 11, 2009, 07:53:41 PM
Quote from: ducatiz on August 11, 2009, 07:49:35 PM
i heard that's curable nowadays
Doctors will promise anything...

kinda like lawyers.
Title: Re: Statler and Ducpainter are assholes
Post by: Statler on August 11, 2009, 07:55:27 PM
Quote from: ducpainter on August 11, 2009, 07:53:41 PM
Doctors will promise anything...

kinda like lawyers.

my diamond studded guarantee.   ;D
Title: Re: Statler and Ducpainter are assholes
Post by: ducatiz on August 11, 2009, 07:55:52 PM
Quote from: ducpainter on August 11, 2009, 07:53:41 PM
Doctors will promise anything...

kinda like lawyers.

and painters
Title: Re: Statler and Ducpainter are assholes
Post by: ducpainter on August 11, 2009, 07:57:34 PM
Quote from: ducatiz on August 11, 2009, 07:55:52 PM
and painters
You've obviously been hanging with the wrong ones.
Title: Re: Statler and Ducpainter are assholes
Post by: ducatiz on August 11, 2009, 08:01:31 PM
Quote from: ducpainter on August 11, 2009, 07:57:34 PM
You've obviously been hanging with the wrong ones.

why would i hang with painters, nate?

y'all all smell like mek and bananas
Title: Re: Statler and Ducpainter are assholes
Post by: ducpainter on August 11, 2009, 08:04:44 PM
Quote from: ducatiz on August 11, 2009, 08:01:31 PM
why would i hang with painters, nate?

y'all all smell like mek and bananas
Bananas?

I don't smoke them any more.

And it's Toluene....the universal solvent.

Get it on your skin and it's in your urine within 20 seconds.

How do you expect a painter to smell?
Title: Re: Statler and Ducpainter are assholes
Post by: Rev. Millertime on August 11, 2009, 08:10:25 PM
Quote from: Statler on August 11, 2009, 07:41:37 PM
'sup, Wade.    when are we going shooting?

Any time... currently am in a great location just south of the Black Hills with plenty of open country to throw lead around in.

Quote from: ducatiz on August 11, 2009, 07:42:10 PM
not that i would dare disrespect your profession, but i thought politicians had the market on producing shit, i didn't know there were unelected professional assholes...   [beer]

If only politicians can be considered professional assholes, my ex-box (ex-girlfriend) must think I'm in politics....

A conversation from about 5 years ago in front of a bar in my home town-
Me to girlfriend at the time: Go take a long walk off of a short pier!
Random female:  He's kind of an asshole.
GF:  He's not just an asshole, he's a professional asshole!

Title: Re: Statler and Ducpainter are assholes
Post by: ducatiz on August 11, 2009, 08:11:56 PM
Quote from: ducpainter on August 11, 2009, 08:04:44 PM
Bananas?

I don't smoke them any more.

And it's Toluene....the universal solvent.

Get it on your skin and it's in your urine within 20 seconds.

How do you expect a painter to smell?

bananas:  the scent that almost all VOC-based paint seems to have.. don't know why, it just smells like candy bananas

i always used MEK or DMSO.

Title: Re: Statler and Ducpainter are assholes
Post by: DRKWNG on August 11, 2009, 08:36:18 PM
Quote from: Rev. Millertime on August 11, 2009, 08:10:25 PM
Any time... currently am in a great location just south of the Black Hills with plenty of open country to throw lead around in.

I need to go and do some of that.   Need to BZO the aimpoint I just put on the "M4".
Title: Re: Statler and Ducpainter are assholes
Post by: He Man on August 11, 2009, 10:01:15 PM
Quote from: ducpainter on August 11, 2009, 08:04:44 PM
Get it on your skin and it's in your urine within 20 seconds.

So if we mixed it with green dye, i can have green pee?
Title: Re: Statler and Ducpainter are assholes
Post by: somegirl on August 11, 2009, 10:23:44 PM
Quote from: He Man on August 11, 2009, 10:01:15 PM
So if we mixed it with green dye, i can have green pee?

Eat some beets and you can have pink pee.
Title: Re: Statler and Ducpainter are assholes
Post by: Big Troubled Bear on August 11, 2009, 11:18:22 PM
Quote from: ducatiz on August 11, 2009, 08:01:31 PM
why would i hang with painters, nate?

y'all all smell like mek and bananas

So I like bananas WTF [thumbsup]
Title: Re: Statler and Ducpainter are assholes
Post by: TiNi on August 12, 2009, 01:47:00 AM
Quote from: somegirl on August 11, 2009, 10:23:44 PM
Eat some beets and you can have pink pee.

i never noticed that one  [thumbsup] [laugh]
Title: Re: Statler and Ducpainter are assholes
Post by: ducpainter on August 12, 2009, 02:58:49 PM
Quote from: ducatiz on August 11, 2009, 08:11:56 PM
bananas:  the scent that almost all VOC-based paint seems to have.. don't know why, it just smells like candy bananas

i always used MEK or DMSO.


paint just smells like...

paint. ???

You need to take a good huff of the clear I use...

that stuff drives people away. ;)

Title: Re: Statler and Ducpainter are assholes
Post by: Charlief on August 12, 2009, 03:43:23 PM
I have nothing to add to this thread except this.....


(http://i241.photobucket.com/albums/ff27/charlieff/photo-3.jpg)


Nate,

This is always in my house...  You'll get your own bottle very soon. [beer]
Title: Re: Statler and Ducpainter are assholes
Post by: ducpainter on August 12, 2009, 03:46:07 PM
Quote from: Charlief on August 12, 2009, 03:43:23 PM
I have nothing to add to this thread except this.....


(http://i241.photobucket.com/albums/ff27/charlieff/photo-3.jpg)


Nate,

This is always in my house...  You'll get your own bottle very soon. [beer]
dp likes charlief.....

I may have to get my paper work straightened out so I can visit you.... [laugh]

Title: Re: Statler and Ducpainter are assholes
Post by: rockaduc on August 12, 2009, 04:50:29 PM
Quote from: Charlief on August 12, 2009, 03:43:23 PM
I have nothing to add to this thread except this.....


(http://i241.photobucket.com/albums/ff27/charlieff/photo-3.jpg)


Nate,

This is always in my house...  You'll get your own bottle very soon. [beer]
Saw that bottle in the local liquor store this week and was intrigued...until I realised that the vodka was made by some guy named "Tito" and was made in Texas.  I then ran in the other direction.
Title: Re: Statler and Ducpainter are assholes
Post by: ducatiz on August 12, 2009, 05:45:29 PM
Quote from: Big Troubled Bear on August 11, 2009, 11:18:22 PM
So I like bananas WTF [thumbsup]

thats what she said
Title: Re: Statler and Ducpainter are assholes
Post by: zooom on August 14, 2009, 05:29:27 AM
Quote from: He Man on August 11, 2009, 10:01:15 PM
So if we mixed it with green dye, i can have green pee?

Re-Animator fluid ala HP Lovecraft what?

Title: Re: Statler and Ducpainter are assholes
Post by: He Man on August 14, 2009, 05:55:00 AM
im confuxed
Title: Re: Statler and Ducpainter are assholes
Post by: mstevens on August 14, 2009, 07:41:17 AM
Quote from: He Man on August 14, 2009, 05:55:00 AM
im confuxed

Pleased to meet you, confuxed.