What is your most embarassing experience?
I got one then one that had potential.
When I was 16 I was run over by a car on my neighborhood street. I ended up under it. When they started to push the car off of me, I noticed my shorts and draws had melted to the catalytic converter. I attempted to keep them on but it was no go. So out I came in the remnants of a beater... and nothing else. Now at this time it made no difference to me, I was a blood fountain. The ambulance came and any time there are sirens there are spectators so out came all the neighbors. It was only after a friend that was present informed me of my high level of exposure that I thought about it. It made any fund raising for sports quite difficult to do my remaining year in high school. "Hey can you donate/purchase for x sport? It's the least you could do. Consider it a staring at my dong tax."
Next was the following year. Now as everyone knows, high school has one, maybe two "safe" toilets and they are usually the least accessable. Well on this day I had an emergency and had to use one of the worst restrooms, which sucked bad enough in it's own right. So as I had planted my cheeks on the nest and made a commitment to let it loose... The fvcking fire alarm goes off. Seriously, you have got to be fvcking kidding me. At first it was nice, you know, minus the shrill, ear piercing alarm. Once the building was evacuated it was a stress free, again besides my bleeding ears from the alarm, duece, no mf'ers were going to walk in and lob shit over the stalls or anything to that effect. I just figured I would wait it out and hop out of the bathroom as soon as everyone else came back in. Well, this happened to be a real fire one of the lunch ladies caused. So I was in there forever. Not able to stand sitting in a disgusting bathroom any more I decided to make a break for it. So I ninja'ed my way through the building coming within feet of administration and not getting caught. I sneak out one of the doors that open in to a less crowded area. Then five steps from the building, "Why were you in there?" from a teacher just around the bend. Quick on my feet I replied I was just really thirsty and she let it go at that. Mostly this story wasn't too embarassing, but had I been busted during my ninja'ing and they asked what the hell I was doing in the building, I would have no other reply than to boldly say, "Dropping a damn duece."
Most recent embarassing experience
putting some gear in the trunk of a Cadillac Seville
did you know they have some kind of electric closing mechanism?
so when you close the trunk lid it appears to not be latched
and
any normal person would then try to re-open it and slam it harder
but when grabbing the lip to re-open the lid
the closing mechanism sucks the lid closed on fingers of both hands
trapping me there like a idiot
whilst pops stands there laughing hysterically
On top of being sad and horrible this is the most embarrising story of my life.
When I was twenty I moved to Phoenix AZ to go to Universal Technical Institute. After being there 3 weeks, my roomate (which I barely knew), had an allergic reaction to the pesticides they were using in our apartment and died in his sleep. After calling 911 and trying to do CPR, I went outside to wait for the ambulance/cops. Obvioulsy it was a bad situation and somewhat confusing to the cops why a healthy 20 year old would just die like that. I answered a ton of questions about drugs and whether or not we had been mad at eachother or not. About two hours into the investigation I am approached by a hot ass female detective and she says to me "I noticed a bunch of tissuses in the trash can in your room, have you been sick too?" To which I had to reply "No mam, you see I just moved away from my gf of 4 years and that's not snot in those tissues." She certainly was not ready for that answer and I was mortified.
Quote from: metallimonster on July 22, 2008, 07:36:22 AM
"No mam, you see I just moved away from my gf of 4 years and that's not snot in those tissues." She certainly was not ready for that answer and I was mortified.
That's an awesome moment in a really crappy situation!
ever fall down a flight of stairs at a party wearing a mini? :-[
I was a pretty dorky teenager (not like much has changed in the past three decades, but it's important to set this in context) and had a pretty formidable vocabulary. Of course, since it was all from reading I couldn't pronounce half of the fancy words I liked to use and often got the wrong one stuck in my head. Lots of little gaffes, but one stands out. At the final round of a big speech team tournament (I said I was a dork, OK?) I gave a brilliantly researched, incisively-argued and quite thorough five minute extemporaneous speech on the thorny issue of abortion, elucidating the moral, legal and societal impetus to balance the rights of the woman with those of the feces.
So this is one of my most proud moments, followed shortly by one of my most embarrassing.
I was having a little liquor party at my apartment a few years ago, everyone was getting friendly and drunk. After ALMOST all of the guests had left, a few of my lady friends and one of my buddies decided to go have a little romp in my room. One of my lady friends had brought some guy she met on the internet, but he had passed out puking in my bathroom, and we soon forgot about him. Boom boom, bang bang, shake rattle and roll...A little while into the action, without a knock or any warning, a silhouette comes barging into the dark room, and up pop one, two, three, four heads looking toward the doorway. Because of the lighting and the quick running away of our 'guest' no one really saw who it was, and we all laughed our asses off remembering the guy in the bathroom.
Next day...
Another girl I had been sniffing around that lived in the same complex as myself comes over to hang for a bit, but quickly asks rhetorically, "So....what was going on in your room last night". Turns out she had heard about the party a little late, I must have forgot to lock the front door, and she just wandered in, thought she heard someone awake in my room and entered.
Funny now, very embarrassing at the time.
Quote from: DuCaTiNi on July 22, 2008, 09:04:53 AM
ever fall down a flight of stairs at a party wearing a mini? :-[
Yep. :-[
sac
j/k
Quote from: triangleforge on July 22, 2008, 10:01:21 AM
I was a pretty dorky teenager (not like much has changed in the past three decades, but it's important to set this in context) and had a pretty formidable vocabulary. Of course, since it was all from reading I couldn't pronounce half of the fancy words I liked to use and often got the wrong one stuck in my head. Lots of little gaffes, but one stands out. At the final round of a big speech team tournament (I said I was a dork, OK?) I gave a brilliantly researched, incisively-argued and quite thorough five minute extemporaneous speech on the thorny issue of abortion, elucidating the moral, legal and societal impetus to balance the rights of the woman with those of the feces.
now that is funny
When I was 17 some friends and I were on a road trip to see a concert in Vancouver 800km away.
Apparently the strict diet I had been on the for the last week of cheetos and beer upset my bum... violently.
We pull up to a gas station in the middle of nowhere. I am about 10 seconds from shitting my pants.
I run to the men's bathroom. Some guy is in there (only one stall). DAMN [bang]
There is no one else around and I sneak into the ladies room (also only one stall).
Kaboom! I'm thinking to myself - "wow that was a close one"
Then - through the crack in the stall door I see a lady waiting patiently for the stall.
Keep in mind that the aforementioned Kaboom was followed by a disgusting stinking symphony of relief.
Then - through the crack in the stall door I see another lady waiting - then another.. soon a line up of about 6 women had formed.
Hmmm what to do. Should I wash my hands after so that at least they think I am clean?
Nope fack it I'm pulling a runner. I wipe up flush and charge out the door like I'm storming the beaches at Normandy.
I yell "Sorry!" and bolt to the car. Luckily my friends were already in the car and we peel out of there in my brown volvo wagon.
It was hilarious. [laugh]
1) I worked as a boat mechanic/rigger in my late teens. The company was getting boats ready for the Annapolis show, and we were all working late to get everything ready. I had been working on one of the smaller boats, that was on a trailer, and had to get a tool from my box. I jumped over the ide of the boat, and as I did, my jeans cuff caught on the boats cleat leaving me hanging upside down, unable to free myself, no matter what I did. I finally abandoned my dignity completely, and hollered for help. I was eventually freed, but not before everyone in the shop had a good laugh.
2) Soon after my son turned 13, I was in his room one day, when I noticed a greasy tube of Preparation H without a top on the nightstand. I threw it in his trashcan, and moved on. The next day, I walked in, and the tube was back on the nightstand. I asked him if his hemorhoids were bothering him, and he just blushed, and started stammering. That's when it hit me, 13 year old boy, greasy substance, puberty, DUH! I asked him if he was, ahem, "enjoying himself", and he blushed even harder, so I told him "Alex, don't use this, this stuff is supposed to SHRINK swelling."
I bought him an extra large tub of vaseline the next day.
When I was about 19 I had been in a car crash and got hurt. One of the Hurt things was my hand. Because it tried to go through the windshield My right ringfinger Knuckle had been flayed open and then received a few stitches shortly after the crash. So a couple of months later they have me in there for a minor surgery to remove the scar tissue that had built up on the knuckle and that should make it so that I can close my hand all the way you see. Couldn't make a fist.
So doc says were just going to give you a local and do the operation, no problem. Then they get me into one of those gown things you know and then later they have me take it off when the come in to give me a shot in the butt with a "sedative" Tom and Jerry are on the little TV and cat chases mouse, Mouse hits the cat in the head, I cant pay attention to TV anymore because everything is feeling good and my whole body is buzzing.
The Nurses come in to take me to the operation room and say "Hold on to the top sheet while we pull out the bottom sheet" of course I can't hold on to anything very tight bad hand or no on account of the "Sedative" They pulled both sheets off and I think I was sportin a boner. She says something like "I told you to hold on to the top sheet" I'm like, yeah right, whatever...
My main concern after that as they wheeled me into the OR was where's Tom & Jerry?
Shortly after that, it was lights out for about an hour or so.
I just shrugged it off. I think they do that on purpose.
I'm sure I could come up with many, but here's 2. Both moto related of course.
In high school one of the bikes I had was an XT350. After we closed up at work (walmart, back when they DID close) everyone was in the parking lot. I get on and let er rip. Right into one of those parking lot islands going about 30. I contend there was oil there not allowing me to turn around the island. Up and over the island no problem. The landing wasn't so good. Front wheel bucked and tossed me off. I landed with all my weight on my left hand, and my left elbow was smashed into my ribs. So I'm sitting up watching the bike slide away from me in a nice show of sparks and grinding. So what can you do. You jump up and look around (yeah they all saw it) go pick up the bike and baby it the rest of the way home. and piss blood for a week and try never to laugh cuz your ribs are at least fractured if not broken. ouch.
2nd time, on a SecaII. Was over at a friends apartment and when leaving decided to do a burnout cuz the rear tire was toast anyway. They had walked me out so why not? Didn't give it quite enough gas, and the front wheel lofts into a perfectly balanced wheelie. And I can't do wheelies. So I' heading for the road from the parking lot and finally get it put down, just in time to slide it under the rear of a parked Taurus. Luckily the roadway was clear. So that was embarassing. Funny part is, a lady stopped after we had picked up the bike, rolled down her window, and said "oh thank god I thought you might be my son" and drove off.
first day of high school
I'm just hitting 6 foot tall, 135 lbs. sooo skinny , I had to run around the shower to get wet. total dork (just like now)
As I walk across the campus for the first time, I passed a group of older students, mostly cheerleaders, and one of the girls says, "hey, my friend here like you" , trying to embarrass me.
I did that nervous laugh where your mouth is kinda closed...... I blew snot everywhere [laugh]
Quote from: bobspapa on July 22, 2008, 03:31:42 PM
first day of high school
I'm just hitting 6 foot tall, 135 lbs. sooo skinny , I had to run around the shower to get wet. total dork (just like now)
As I walk across the campus for the first time, I passed a group of older students, mostly cheerleaders, and one of the girls says, "hey, my friend here like you" , trying to embarrass me.
I did that nervous laugh where your mouth is kinda closed...... I blew snot everywhere [laugh]
[laugh]
At the same age I accidentally spat in a girls mouth while talking to her.
Quote from: SKOM on July 22, 2008, 03:46:15 PM
[laugh]
At the same age I accidentally spat in a girls mouth while talking to her.
thats called snowballing.
[puke]
[laugh]
"Everything. OK! I'll talk! In third grade, I cheated on my history exam. In fourth grade, I stole my uncle Max's toupee and I glued it on my face when I was Moses in my Hebrew School play. In fifth grade, I knocked my sister Edie down the stairs and I blamed it on the dog... When my mom sent me to the summer camp for fat kids and then they served lunch I got nuts and I pigged out and they kicked me out... But the worst thing I ever done - I mixed a pot of fake puke at home and then I went to this movie theater, hid the puke in my jacket, climbed up to the balcony and then, t-t-then, I made a noise like this: hua-hua-hua-huaaaaaaa - and then I dumped it over the side, all over the people in the audience. And then, this was horrible, all the people started getting sick and throwing up all over each other. I never felt so bad in my entire life."
;D
funniest story ever.... on an LA radio show, The Mark and Brian show, they had a caller confess to his g/f that he took a dump in the cat box. She had taken it to the vet thinking there was something wrong with the kitten. [laugh]
Quote from: Pakhan on July 22, 2008, 04:03:48 PM
"Everything. OK! I'll talk! In third grade, I cheated on my history exam. In fourth grade, I stole my uncle Max's toupee and I glued it on my face when I was Moses in my Hebrew School play. In fifth grade, I knocked my sister Edie down the stairs and I blamed it on the dog... When my mom sent me to the summer camp for fat kids and then they served lunch I got nuts and I pigged out and they kicked me out... But the worst thing I ever done - I mixed a pot of fake puke at home and then I went to this movie theater, hid the puke in my jacket, climbed up to the balcony and then, t-t-then, I made a noise like this: hua-hua-hua-huaaaaaaa - and then I dumped it over the side, all over the people in the audience. And then, this was horrible, all the people started getting sick and throwing up all over each other. I never felt so bad in my entire life."
;D
those aren't examples of embarassing experiences :)
they're more like examples of you being a bad boy [evil]
Quote from: Pakhan on July 22, 2008, 04:03:48 PM
"Everything. OK! I'll talk! In third grade, I cheated on my history exam. In fourth grade, I stole my uncle Max's toupee and I glued it on my face when I was Moses in my Hebrew School play. In fifth grade, I knocked my sister Edie down the stairs and I blamed it on the dog... When my mom sent me to the summer camp for fat kids and then they served lunch I got nuts and I pigged out and they kicked me out... But the worst thing I ever done - I mixed a pot of fake puke at home and then I went to this movie theater, hid the puke in my jacket, climbed up to the balcony and then, t-t-then, I made a noise like this: hua-hua-hua-huaaaaaaa - and then I dumped it over the side, all over the people in the audience. And then, this was horrible, all the people started getting sick and throwing up all over each other. I never felt so bad in my entire life."
;D
Quote from: DuCaTiNi on July 22, 2008, 04:14:50 PM
those aren't examples of embarassing experiences :)
they're more like examples of you being a bad boy [evil]
Heeeey, yooouuu guuuuys!!!
First date with new hot girl, it is double date with my best friend and his girl, 4 of us go to Pizza Hut for dinner, take road trip, car breaks down in middle of no-where, and I get projectile diarrhea while waiting for tow truck, so I run out in the corn field and spray while the 2 girls and my best friend laugh :-[
Then I had to ask for a klennex to wipe up :-\
mitt
Stalling and dropping my bike at my very first Ducati Meet up ;D
No damage but just my ego :-\
Freshman year in high school. My dad finds a wallet of a classmate of mine in the parking lot of the gym. He brings it home and I'm given specific instructions not to touch it. So I grab it on my way to the pooper and sit down with it as I do my business. (Side note: bathroom in topic is 5 ft. from the front door.) As I'm flipping through the wallet in the middle of my deposit, DING DONG! I hear some muffled conversation after my parents answer the door and then a KNOCK, KNOCK, "Do you know where the wallet is?" Mind you, the people at the door do not know this room is a bathroom, it's just a door with someone inside. I have no idea how it looked on the outside, but here I am trying to shove the wallet underneath the bathroom door. I didn't want to open it due to the fact that my pants are around my ankles and I'm sitting on the pot. So I'm shoving and shoving and shoving the wallet under the door to no avail. It's not going to work. My mom says, "just open the door and hand it to me!" The parents of the kid who's wallet it was were apparently just standing there confused at to why someone is shoving a wallet under the door instead of just opening it. Finally I give up and open the door and hand off the wallet as fast as I can. I'm not sure if I'm more embarrassed for myself or for my parents who had to be the ones handling it. Either way, I come out of the bathroom to have my parents, my two brothers, and my brother's girlfriend all standing there with WTF faces staring at me. Lesson learned.
Quote from: Mother on July 22, 2008, 04:34:13 PM
Heeeey, yooouuu guuuuys!!!
Great movie! I even had the Goonies game for Nintendo!
As for the subject of this thread, I've never done anything embarassing in my life... ;)
At least nothing I'll own up to!
I don't have anything too embarassing. I think I must have repressed it all.
Anyway, after learning how to ride on a 1973 Yamaha 125 enduro, my friend and I decide to learn how to do wheelies in his backyard (with the help of a little bump in the grass and dropping the clutch). We get it down pretty well.
Later on with like 20 people over for a cookout, we get the enduro out and proceed to act like idiots (no helmets mind you). I goose it a bit too much and literally stand the bike straight up. I freak and jump off, but somehow manage to walk/run behind the motorcycle hanging onto the bars and set it back down while jumping back on. I think it they hadn't seen the look on my face I could have played it off as me having mad skills, but instead I got laughed at for a while.
Next two are bathroom related, but not really embarassing because I didn't let it get to me. (you can avoid embarassment a lot depending on how you play it off.
Freshman year of college I let loose an unholy dump and there happens to be someone in another stall. All I hear is "holy Sh!t, not that's how its done!" I just say thank you, I've been thinking of turning pro.
The next one was on a first date, and while waiting to eat at outback (classy for college right?). Well, even before we ate my stomach let me know there was something serious about to happen. I excuse myself and head to the men's room. After primary ignition, a couple of rednecks walk in and immediately start going off. "holy sh!t, that just ain't right. You don't do something like that in public you save that for home" They continue for a bit longer and at this point I'm done but just sitting still. I wait until they leave before exiting the stall. I guess that time I would have been embarassed. At least my date was none the wiser, except I wonder what she was thinking with me taking so long. I got a second date at least.
Quote from: Duc Stamp on July 23, 2008, 06:37:08 AM
Next two are bathroom related, but not really embarassing because I didn't let it get to me. (you can avoid embarassment a lot depending on how you play it off.
Freshman year of college I let loose an unholy dump and there happens to be someone in another stall. All I hear is "holy Sh!t, not that's how its done!" I just say thank you, I've been thinking of turning pro.
The next one was on a first date, and while waiting to eat at outback (classy for college right?). Well, even before we ate my stomach let me know there was something serious about to happen. I excuse myself and head to the men's room. After primary ignition, a couple of rednecks walk in and immediately start going off. "holy sh!t, that just ain't right. You don't do something like that in public you save that for home" They continue for a bit longer and at this point I'm done but just sitting still. I wait until they leave before exiting the stall. I guess that time I would have been embarassed. At least my date was none the wiser, except I wonder what she was thinking with me taking so long. I got a second date at least.
Here is a similiar one, from when me and a friend made 1k mile trip to get the bike.
We stopped at a rest stop in WV and I walk up to the pisser and just start lettin' her go. Then I let loose a bowel dropping fart that echoed in the bathroom. Imagine the bottom falling out and then some. I was pretty surprised there was no tracer. So anyways, from out of nowhere, a little kid voice behind the stall goes, "That's disgusting!"
I shouted in a gruff mountain voice, "WELCOME TO AMERICA." Then walked out.
Which brings me to a different point, how big of a pussy was that kid. Me at 5 or whatever age would have laughed my damn ass off. What ever pair of twats is raising that kid really needs to change methods, otherwise that kid is playground meat.
Quote from: fwtcc on July 23, 2008, 07:08:02 AM
Here is a similiar one, from when me and a friend made 1k mile trip to get the bike.
We stopped at a rest stop in WV and I walk up to the pisser and just start lettin' her go. Then I let loose a bowel dropping fart that echoed in the bathroom. Imagine the bottom falling out and then some. I was pretty surprised there was no tracer. So anyways, from out of nowhere, a little kid voice behind the stall goes, "That's disgusting!"
I shouted in a gruff mountain voice, "WELCOME TO AMERICA." Then walked out.
Which brings me to a different point, how big of a pussy was that kid. Me at 5 or whatever age would have laughed my damn ass off. What ever pair of twats is raising that kid really needs to change methods, otherwise that kid is playground meat.
I can't disagree with you. In fact, I'd still think it's funny.
Quote from: DaniD on July 23, 2008, 05:20:47 AM
Great movie! I even had the Goonies game for Nintendo!
As for the subject of this thread, I've never done anything embarassing in my life... ;)
At least nothing I'll own up to!
Is it embarrasing that I know the game was actually the Goonies 2? There was no Goonies 1 game for the American NES.
Quote from: vwboomer on July 22, 2008, 03:22:43 PM
2nd time, on a SecaII. Was over at a friends apartment and when leaving decided to do a burnout cuz the rear tire was toast anyway. They had walked me out so why not? Didn't give it quite enough gas, and the front wheel lofts into a perfectly balanced wheelie.
You did a wheelie on a SecaII?? Is that physically possible?
Quote from: DuCaTiNi on July 22, 2008, 09:04:53 AM
ever fall down a flight of stairs at a party wearing a mini? :-[
yes!
Glad some of you got my Goonies reference. ;D
I have had many, but these come to mind.
Having car trouble with my friends car in HS. I was driving and I stop on a hill and tell him I'm gonna check under the hood. I'm looking and ask him to sit in the drivers seat and give it some gas. He does and I immediately realize I forgot to put it in park as this toyota swallows me and I fall into the engine compartment.
I was 10 and fishing on a dock upstate NY. The family wanders off and I toss the rod back to cast out my hook. It got stuck in my back and I was yelling for help until they came back. They took a while since they were 1/4 way around the lake.
I was 12 and was at a family friends house. They had a cinder block wall garage with a hole that led to a wasps nest that they needed to get rid of. I begged them to let me do it and they said ok. So I got a bunch of gasoline, kerosene, 20 M-80's, and a small flare. I shoved about a pint of gas and a pint of kerosene in there with the fire works. I lit the flare and tossed it in waiting about 2 feet from the hole. Lots of smoke and then nothing.
The smoke cleared, so I did my best willie coyote move and put my eye up to this hole to look inside. I don't know to this day what the hell I was hoping to see since the nest was about 4 feet below the hole in a dark hollow of a wall. Well right then it blew up in my face and blinded me with gas, kerosene, M-80's, cinder block, and wasp pieces. I couldn't see and no one was around, but there was a pool nearby so I felt my way over to it to wash my eye. So I washed my eye with heavy chlorinated water, now it hurt more than before and I still couldn't see. I eventually regained my sight when the adults came outside and helped after seeing me do the arms in front blind zombie walk around the back yard. :-[
Quote from: Pakhan on July 23, 2008, 11:34:12 AM
I was 12 and was at a family friends house. They had a cinder block wall garage with a hole that led to a wasps nest that they needed to get rid of. I begged them to let me do it and they said ok. So I got a bunch of gasoline, kerosene, 20 M-80's, and a small flare. I shoved about a pint of gas and a pint of kerosene in there with the fire works. I lit the flare and tossed it in waiting about 2 feet from the hole. Lots of smoke and then nothing.
The smoke cleared, so I did my best willie coyote move and put my eye up to this hole to look inside. I don't know to this day what the hell I was hoping to see since the nest was about 4 feet below the hole in a dark hollow of a wall. Well right then it blew up in my face and blinded me with gas, kerosene, M-80's, cinder block, and wasp pieces. I couldn't see and no one was around, but there was a pool nearby so I felt my way over to it to wash my eye. So I washed my eye with heavy chlorinated water, now it hurt more than before and I still couldn't see. I eventually regained my sight when the adults came outside and helped after seeing me do the arms in front blind zombie walk around the back yard. :-[
Lucky you didn't blow your head off.
Quote from: MikeZ on July 23, 2008, 01:42:52 PM
Lucky you didn't blow your head off.
That all depends who you ask ;D
Quote from: MikeZ on July 23, 2008, 01:42:52 PM
Lucky you didn't blow your head off.
yes, and it explains a few things too.... [laugh] j/k ;D
Quote from: DuCaTiNi on July 23, 2008, 01:50:22 PM
yes, and it explains a few things too.... [laugh] j/k ;D
My crooked nose or bad hair? [laugh]
your bad posture