whores! - And not the good kind.

[junior varsity]

I say have some sense of self-pride. You don't stick around and let it happen over and over, have some self respect. Get ahold of yourself, and all those related movie phrases.

[vwboomer]

In Wisconsin, from experience of others and reading up, it doesn't matter who did what. The woman almost always comes out ahead. That's part of the reason I waited almost 3 years to get divorced the first time. She moved out less than a year after getting married, and couldn't hold a job down etc. No way was I gonna file then and get stuck with some liberal judge telling me I gotta pay.

We met today and agreed in principal on who gets what. I offered to try to give her what the initial cost of the house was, but I don't know if I can follow up on that. I can afford the payment, but the tightening credit market might mean I can't get the loan. Anyway, that way she'd get her initial investment back. I am, however, prepared to put my crap in storage and move if need be.
I've agreed to try to do this amicably. I stand to gain nothing by hiring a $2500 retainer lawyer. She made less than  $1000 more than me last year, and has more bills. I told her I want her to pay for the lawyer (only 1 person needs one if everything is uncontested) but that I will hire a good lawyer if I need to. I've got that money in the bank from my accident so at least that's something goin for me

I believe she is at least slightly remorseful about the whole thing - I hope she's losing sleep but who can tell. ( I've pointed out several times what's with the tears? you were make the beast with two backsing around for a couple months and couldn't have felt that bad.)

However that hasn't stopped her from carrying on with him still. Not surprised.


As for her not living in the house....Since she pays the house payment.........I'm going to push for this to get resolved quickly.

Some hours and days are good, some are pretty bad. Like I told a guy at work: Every day I get up out of bed and leave the guns in the cabinet is a step in the right direction.


And yeah, some sort of revenge on either/both of them would be nice, but I would be dedicating time to that which would be better spent on me.

[T-byrd]

And yeah, some sort of revenge on either/both of them would be nice, but I would be dedicating time to that which would be better spent on me.

That is very good to read.  Live a full and happy life, that's the best form of revenge, IMO. 

Good luck, it will get better.

T

[junior varsity]

+1.  Right attitude.

[DucPete]

That is very good to read.  Live a full and happy life, that's the best form of revenge, IMO. 

Good luck, it will get better.

T

I totally agree with this.   BUT, if you don't properly come to grips with all this you'll just be filing it away for a later date.  I know T-Byrd doesn't mean that you should ignore it.  But I think it should be said that you need to deal with the issues that come from this. Especially since it's the second time.  And I would agree with the other comment about talking to a shrink.  The truth is we could all probably benefit from it.  I know I do. 

[SacDuc]

boomer,

I just wanted you to know that, while it may not happen as often as it should, every once and a while a cheater gets what's coming to them in the most spectacular of ways.

Enjoy:

(audio only, NSFW in the strictest of offices)
http://www.break.com/index/another-cheating-girlfriend-dumped-hard.html


sac

[vwboomer]

lol that's awesome
I have a feeling he'd come home from work to find his stuff all tore up for the stunt tho


As for me I'm trying to get thru to the wife that she should sell me the house for 83k. She doesnt' want to since we owe 69, and her initial payment was 83 when buying it. Add in some home improvement stuff  - I think she paid for 1/4 the windows, tankless waterheater, cabinets, dishwasher, oven, fridge) and she thinks she ought to get more. Fair market value is probably right around 100 (says 94 on the tax rolls). So assume it would actually sell for 100 - and in a timely fashion - and her half of that is....*gasp* about 14k! Something just isn't getting through.
There was a slight breakdown in communications when I called her a piece of shit and said if there is a hell she'll be burning in it.

So there's always that.

I've got some money for the down payment, but not quite 10%. these days who knows. But if it came down to making a necessary downpayment via selling the Duc, I don't think I'd do it. Of course, paying 700 to rent an apartment doesn't appeal to me either and wouldn't allow me to save for a house so I dunno. I could get a van and live down by the river!

[T-byrd]

If you really want the house (and do you really?  Memories and such), then everything else you would have to compromise can be replaced down the road.  If you have to rent a place, remember that it wont be forever.  The market is crap everywhere, you could get a nice place for next to nothing.  And it would be all yours, waiting for new memories to be made.

Sometimes it's worth it to just walk away.  Just some food for thought.  Good luck, you will come out ahead in the long run, regardless of what happens.

T

[somegirl]

Sometimes it's worth it to just walk away.  Just some food for thought.  Good luck, you will come out ahead in the long run, regardless of what happens.

+1