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Lies, and the lying liars that lie about them
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Topic: Lies, and the lying liars that lie about them (Read 12182 times)
Bun-bun
Hero Member
Offline
Posts: 1884
2002 M620 Dark ie
Lies, and the lying liars that lie about them
«
on:
May 22, 2008, 03:45:22 PM »
I had to make my deadbeat phone calls today. You know, "Mrs X, we finished your job 3 months ago, and you owe us $Y. When can we expect a check?"
I do this once every couple of months or so, and today I got hit with the classic "The check is in the mail." line. twice.
So it started me thinking. I know that those checks haven't even been written yet, much less mailed, and the deadbeats have to know that I know.
Anyway, I started compiling a list of the lies everyone hears so often they've become joke taglines.
Here's what I've got so far:
The check's in the mail.
I'm from the government, I'm here to help you.
I'll only put it in a little bit.
I only want a little bite.
The natives are friendly.
And for all the service and ex-service:
Don't worry, it's a cold LZ.
Any help in adding to this list?
Logged
"A fanatic is a man who does what he knows God would do, if only god had all the facts of the matter" S.M. Stirling
zarn02
Hero Member
Offline
Posts: 2642
Re: Lies, and the lying liars that lie about them
«
Reply #1 on:
May 22, 2008, 03:51:40 PM »
"i just want a sip."
"it's not you, it's me."
Logged
"If it weren't for our gallows humor, we'd have nothing to hang our hopes on."
TiNi
Post Whore
Offline
Posts: 15375
'05 620ie
Re: Lies, and the lying liars that lie about them
«
Reply #2 on:
May 22, 2008, 03:53:42 PM »
"It won't hurt, I promise"
Logged
mstevens
Monsterless
Hero Member
Offline
Posts: 1267
No Monster of my own, but my wife has an '09 696
Re: Lies, and the lying liars that lie about them
«
Reply #3 on:
May 22, 2008, 04:15:38 PM »
"I can quit any time I want."
Logged
2010 Ducati Multistrada 1200S Touring (Rosso Anniversary Ducati)
2009 Ducati Monster 696 (Giallo Ducati) - Sold
2005 Ducati Monster 620 (Rosso Anniversary Ducati) - Sold
2005 Vespa LX-150 (Rosso Dragone) - First Bike Ever
Casa Suzana
, vacation rental house in Cozumel, Mexico
desmoquattro
Smacking certain mods who change my profile upside the head with a...
Hero Member
Offline
Posts: 4088
It puts the billet aluminum on the motorcycle...
Re: Lies, and the lying liars that lie about them
«
Reply #4 on:
May 22, 2008, 04:18:36 PM »
"Mission Accomplished"
"You got a real purty mouth"
Logged
My Vices
'09 1198s,
red
, (
Il Diavolo Rosso
)
'09
KTM
690 SMC (Thumpy)
'04 Yamaha FZ1, The
Blue
Cockroach
'01 900SS,
custom yellow
, (The Bumblebee)
'05 MS4R,
blue
desmoquattro
Smacking certain mods who change my profile upside the head with a...
Hero Member
Offline
Posts: 4088
It puts the billet aluminum on the motorcycle...
Re: Lies, and the lying liars that lie about them
«
Reply #5 on:
May 22, 2008, 04:19:52 PM »
...and let's not forget:
"The Ducati Monster List is an online club and resource center for Ducati Monster Owners."
Logged
My Vices
'09 1198s,
red
, (
Il Diavolo Rosso
)
'09
KTM
690 SMC (Thumpy)
'04 Yamaha FZ1, The
Blue
Cockroach
'01 900SS,
custom yellow
, (The Bumblebee)
'05 MS4R,
blue
Bun-bun
Hero Member
Offline
Posts: 1884
2002 M620 Dark ie
Re: Lies, and the lying liars that lie about them
«
Reply #6 on:
May 22, 2008, 04:30:20 PM »
Your bike will be ready next week.
Logged
"A fanatic is a man who does what he knows God would do, if only god had all the facts of the matter" S.M. Stirling
TiAvenger
Guest
Re: Lies, and the lying liars that lie about them
«
Reply #7 on:
May 22, 2008, 04:42:55 PM »
I've never measured...
Logged
Mother
Guest
Re: Lies, and the lying liars that lie about them
«
Reply #8 on:
May 22, 2008, 05:28:51 PM »
I love you
Logged
jdubbs32584
Guest
Re: Lies, and the lying liars that lie about them
«
Reply #9 on:
May 22, 2008, 05:32:34 PM »
Quote from: Mother on May 22, 2008, 05:28:51 PM
I love you
+11tybillion Mom.
Logged
Airborne
Crash n' Burn
Hero Member
Offline
Posts: 611
Monster S2R 800 - ALL BLACK
Re: Lies, and the lying liars that lie about them
«
Reply #10 on:
May 22, 2008, 05:37:07 PM »
Maybe a little game called.....just the tip, only for a second
Logged
2007 Monster S2R, Vespa GTS 300, Vino 125
Max LeanAngle
Full Member
Offline
Posts: 171
Trellis Steel and Sex Appeal
Re: Lies, and the lying liars that lie about them
«
Reply #11 on:
May 22, 2008, 05:49:01 PM »
" Huh, I thought there was a least a 1/4 of a tank of gas in the car"
Logged
"A learning experience is one of those things that says, 'You know that thing you just did? Don't do that.' " Douglas Adams
Buckethead
I have a little tiny cape that fits on my
Hero Member
Offline
Posts: 5989
Re: Lies, and the lying liars that lie about them
«
Reply #12 on:
May 22, 2008, 05:53:10 PM »
"Read my lips: No. New. Taxes."
Logged
Quote from: Jester on April 11, 2013, 06:29:35 AM
I can't wait until Marquez gets on his level and makes Jorge trip on his tampon string.
Ohmic
Sr. Member
Offline
Posts: 266
Re: Lies, and the lying liars that lie about them
«
Reply #13 on:
May 22, 2008, 05:53:57 PM »
"She told be she was 18 your honor..."
"Don't worry... i'm on the pill"
Logged
'It's NOT a Harley... It's a Ducati!'
Bike#1: 2002 Ducati MH900e #1801
Bike#2: 2006 Ducati Monster S2R1000
Bike#3: 2006 Ducati Sport1000
Bike#4: 2008 Ducati HyperMotard 1100
Kaveh
Hero Member
Offline
Posts: 821
Dirka Dirka
Re: Lies, and the lying liars that lie about them
«
Reply #14 on:
May 22, 2008, 05:54:35 PM »
Quote from: HobokenHooligan on May 22, 2008, 05:37:07 PM
Maybe a little game called.....just the tip, only for a second
Checks in the mail-- I've heard that one a few times.
I can start work on your project on XX day -- From sub contractors
Logged
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