I shouldn't waste money on lottery tickets...

[Timmy Tucker]

Been pondering things after a post I made in the pic thread. It just hit me how much shit I've made it thru unscathed in my life. It's a bit sobering and at the same time kinda humorous sitting here thinking about it. I'm pretty sure I've used up just about all my luck.

Here's what I can remember off hand...


I've never been struck by lightning, but I've been within 50-100 yds about 10 times. Closest was 3 feet away, hit the heat pump outside the window I was looking out of. 30-ish feet away is the closest while outdoors. Felt like a flash bang went off. 

Been in about 10 vehicle wrecks, both as a passenger and a driver. Rolled and endo'ed in a minivan at 65mph once (passenger). Walked away with only a seatbelt rash. About 2 years ago, I fell asleep at the wheel and ran thru a T-intersection, launched across the far side of a divided 4 lane Dukes of Hazzard style and landed in a field. No harm done.

I've been shocked literally hundreds of times, electrocuted to the point of unconsciousness once.

Got caught in a riptide when I was in Dominica. I can't swim.

Been shot at 3 times. The first time was intentional. Thank god he was drunk, all 5 shots missed from 15 feet.

Been thru 4 Tornadoes, 3 hurricanes and 1 flood.

I was never in a gang, but some of my friends were. Inadvertently ended up in the middle of gang shit all the time. Once got cornered in a public restroom by 7-8 rival gang members and was about to get my ass handed to me when a cop just happened to walk in.

Was attacked by a german shepard when I was 9.

Was almost choked to death by a goat.

I've been in an actual cattle stampede.

I had 2 near mid-air collisions in my piloting days, one of them was with a C-130. You have no concept of how big they really are until you see one suddenly cross your flight path 100ft away.

I've made 3 emergency landings. Once due to fuel trailing out of the wing (a la Die Hard 2) and once for a dying engine. 3rd time was due to loss of all electrical power while flying actual IFR. Basically, flew 200 miles in solid clouds with only a compass, an altimeter and a map. Not the end of the world, but things can get out of hand in a skinny minute.

Cancelled a flight one day only to have the next pilot in that plane lose an engine on takeoff and almost crash.
 
I've woken up to 1/3 of the house engulfed in flames.





All that shit, and the worst that's happened to me was a few broken fingers from fights/basketball, 2 dislocated ribs from a mosh pit and a broken tailbone from a MX crash.




I will never, ever win the lottery.

[DoubleEagle]

Dude....you've used up more than 9 lives and done things that most of us won't do in 9 life times.

Thank your lucky ***** !

If I were you I'd keep buying at least 1 Lottery ticket a week.

W, the kind of luck you just described you're a shoe in ...if you live long enough.

The odds of winning are hundreds of millions to 1 ...but so are the odds of what you have done and really not been hurt hardly.

Dolph       

[zarn02]

You lucky sumpregnant dog...

I'd say that God/universe/chance is firmly in your corner, and you shouldn't press your luck with lottery tickets.

When the universe gives you a free pass through the fence, never pause to ask if you can borrow a ten-spot as well.



(I'm not sure that analogy works, but the beer says it does... yeah, I'll work on it.)

[ducpainter]

I agree with Dolph.

The stuff that's happened to you only happens to the same percentage of people that win the lottery.

You're in like Flynn.

[Charlief]

Was almost choked to death by a goat.

This needs to be explained.

[lethe]

This needs to be explained.

+1
was it the singing goat on the Capitol 1 commercial? He seems like he might be pretty badass.

[Monsterlover]

Goats are the debil

With luck like this you really should consider hitting on hot women with huge pissed off looking boyfriends.

[the_Journeyman]

With luck like this you really should consider hitting on hot women with huge pissed off looking boyfriends.

 

As far as the lightening thing, I've had it run on me once and cause me to nearly flip a couch, and on a different occasion, knock me down and damage my camera.

I was wondering about the goat too.

JM

[Oldfisti]

[bulldogs2k]

This needs to be explained.

Beat me to it!

[He Man]

Beat me to it!

Give that another one. Last i rememebr goats wont have thumbs.

[sbrguy]

the whole shot at while drunk from 15 ft with 5 shots and not getting hit is as lucky as you can get.

[fastwin]

Dammit, we need the goat story. Details dude!

I've accidentally cut myself, I've slipped and fallen twice and I once had a headache a long time ago.

[Vindingo]

the whole shot at while drunk from 15 ft with 5 shots and not getting hit is as lucky as you can get.

that beats the goat story by about 14-15x's

[Stella]

This [goat story] needs to be explained.

Exactly.  Everything else I read in your list made me think of my own "luck" with various experiences. 
But this one just begs explanation.

We're waiting....